Most of us know that good photos are the most important factor for success on dating apps. Great, but… what actually makes a good photo?
At Dreamlens, we help a lot of our users generate dating app photos, so I figured I’d share what (some counterintuitive) kinds of pictures we’ve seen work well across the 1,000+ matches that our users have gotten. I’m not super conventionally attractive and I used these same pictures to take my dating apps from ghost town to being able to consistently line up multiple dates a week.
The Dos
DO show off your physique: despite women saying that it’s cringe, showing off muscles works exceptionally well, but only if done without seeming cringe and try-hard. What women hate is the dirty mirror shirtless bathroom selfie. Ideally, you show off your body in a natural setting: gym selfies with a tank top tucked into sweatpants, wearing a shirt unbuttoned so your abs show through, or biceps filling out a shirt sleeve. If you only add one photo from this guide, make it this one because just adding this can double your matches.
DO showcase your domestic side: surprising, but photos where you’re cooking or doing household chores like washing the dishes are the second most popular type of picture. It makes you seem competent and warm, both very attractive qualities.
DO include animals: not surprising, but pics where you’re playing with a dog or cat always rank among the most popular.
DO wear cool clothes: you should absolutely show that you have taste and style. Quite frankly, most guys dress terribly, so being perceived as stylish is a big deal. I’ve seen guys with cardboard personalities get jumped on because their outfits were cool.
DO cool things: this is basically a brochure for what it’d be like to date you. Travel, music, cooking, parties, are all good candidates. Think from the opposite perspective what would pique your interest if you saw that picture on a profile.
DO wear a suit: if women have the little black dress, men have the suit. Enough said.
DO be in high-value settings: being seen in impressive locations subconsciously conveys success and status: nice hotels, cool restaurants/cafes, interesting travel spots, or upscale parties. While not everyone has access to these, take the opportunity to snap some pics when you do, or when you’re traveling cheaper places.
DO have an amazing first picture: you’ll have milliseconds when she sees your first picture before she decides to swipe left. If the first picture isn’t good, the rest of your profile doesn’t matter. This should be well-lit, headshot, smiling, eye contact with the camera. Get it taken professionally if you must.
The Don'ts
DON’T be unattractive: you'll be judged by your worst picture. This overrides all the other tips. Even if it features a great setting, cool activity, don’t use it if you don’t look good. It’ll just tank what might’ve otherwise been a match.
DON’T smile too much: this again goes against common wisdom to smile, but smiling too much can make you come off as a nice guy, not someone she wants to sleep with. You should aim for a mix of warm and brooding. Check IG or Pinterest for how hot guys pose: it’s often mysterious, looking off to the side.
DON’T be too goofy: according to both data and direct feedback from attractive women, goofy pictures rarely enhance a profile. A subtle hint of humor is fine as long as it doesn’t contradict rule #1, but what you may think is cute and quirky is just taking away your sex appeal. James Bond is not hitting silly poses.
DON’T use inconsistent photos: a lot of guys don’t have a lot of good pictures. I used to be the same, so I get it. Unfortunately this results in using old photos from 10 years ago and those pictures are often unrecognizable. Women will notice, and they’ll just swipe left because they don’t know what you actually look like.
In conclusion, it's crazy the difference better pictures make. I changed nothing besides my pictures and I was getting at least double the number of matches. Plus, I was getting ghosted way less often, with some girls even double texting me when I didn't reply. It goes without saying that setting up dates got significantly easier as well. That's why getting better photos is the highest leverage improvement you can make for dating app success.
Let me know what you think. Does this match your experience? Happy to answer any questions I can as well.
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