Seperated, soon to be ex wife is pregnant with another mans child. How to proceed in court so I don't have to pay child support or spousal support?

OchoZeroCinco · 2025-06-06T23:47:16+00:00

Draw up a MSA, lawyer check, noterize, submit to court in the process

biscuts99 · 2025-06-06T19:25:52+00:00

In your discovery documents they should ask who and when she has been having sex with. They asked my ex that for the specific reason of if they show up pregnant you can show its not yours.

atomicnugget202 · 2025-06-05T00:05:12+00:00

Get a lawyer! I hate to be that blunt but that's the only way.

OchoZeroCinco · 2025-06-04T03:13:13+00:00

How many years have you been married?

engineered-chemistry · 2025-06-03T23:18:56+00:00

Stop posting on reddit and get a fucking attorney bro. One misstep in CA could get you cooked for 18 years

NC_Gato · 2025-06-03T16:33:13+00:00

Unless she can prove the child is your's then you don't have to pay child support for that baby. If you have other children get a DNA done. If they are yours get lawyer and make sure your payment goes through the courts. The reason for that is so she can't say you never paid her. Alimony if you can prove the infidelity then she gets zero. If you live in a state that has an Alienation of affection law you can sue the crap out her lover.

OctinoxateAndZinc · 2025-06-03T14:18:49+00:00

How do I get around this with both the baby and spousal support? This is the worst. Im in california.

Just divorcing in CA alone means you should get an attorney.

Do you want to pay a few grand to a lawyer now or that same amount (or more), yearly, for the next two decades?

GET. A. LAWYER.

jimsmythee · 2025-06-03T13:38:57+00:00

This is lawyer territory. First of all get your lawyer to file a “non paternity event” as part of the divorce paperwork. To dis-establish paternity. Otherwise the court won’t care that the kid isn’t yours and assign you child support.

Pro-IDGAF · 2025-06-03T12:44:35+00:00

you have a complicated life brother. 25 years old and this shit! wtf with is wrong with girls these days!?! in all fairness, when i was about your age and married my wife cheated on me in the 2nd year but i had no hard proof and was too young and dump to jump ship.

i see you have a girlfriend already as well, is that right? best to keep that condom on with sex with her too.

at any rate, listen to these guys here, don’t let your wife drive this ship. get a dna test, divorce her and move on.

warwww · 2025-06-03T12:21:30+00:00

Oh my, you are a better man than most here. To lay in a bed with a woman that’s carrying another man’s child. 😶‍🌫️

I’d rather sleep on the head of a needle.

You need to motion to the courts that you are not this child’s father, I’d be camped in front of the court house or a lawyers office. She’s already shown you how little she thinks of you, you want this in greater doses? If you don’t have any kids with her you need to never speak another word to her again as long as God gives you breath.

Please have some self respect and dignity and don’t allow yourself to be treated this way.

Im all for saving families and honoring vows but this is an untenable situation. You’d have to be a zombie to not act swiftly to get off the tracks of this locomotive that’s headed for you.

Analisandopessoas · 2025-06-03T11:44:41+00:00

You urgently need a lawyer

guy_n_cognito_tu · 2025-06-03T11:14:54+00:00

It sounds like you’re working without an attorney against a woman that’s trying to manipulate you. You desperately need an attorney.

Pleasant-Mechanic-49 · 2025-06-03T11:01:40+00:00

California Family Code §§7540-7541 says that any child u got while the mother is married is presumed to be YOURS. So if you dont do anything, you will be his father :D

BUT, You can defeat that by Filing a motion within 2 years of birth: asking the judge to order genetic testing under §7541:

The notice of motion for blood tests.... may be filed NOT later than two years

If DNA testing shows you are NOT the father, you will have no child-support obligation .

So DONT sign the birth certificate ,DONT EVEN hold the child (to avoid Paternity by estoppel ie the courts assume that as your are involved in the child’s life than u are his father**)**, and DONT agree to any stipulated judgment that says you are the father.

In short, dont be a victim of 🐦Cuckoo bird

+ The “agreement for judgment” she mailed you . Do not shred it—keep it as evidence just in case, & ignore her request.

Attorney or not? technically, you can handle the case without one aka "PRO SE" (self-represented ) but bc of such stakes (child dna..) in a contested divorce , most will tell you to avoid such risky path, IE lawyer UP Yesterday

FUMoney · 2025-06-03T09:18:48+00:00

and wants me to agree to an agreement for judgement that gives the court jurisdiction to award spousal support in an amount of her choosing.

Never, ever, ever, ever, ever, ever ever agree to this. This is one of the dumbest fucking things I've ever read here, and we see a lot of stupid shit.

How to proceed? Get a good lawyer. Be very careful about anything and everything with your ex. Agree to absolutely nothing unless and until your counsel has reviewed it, thought about it, and you both have discussed it at length.

As to child support, you'll never owe child support if you are not a biological parent. That will be solely the responsibility of your ex wife and the child's biological father -- as long as you don't fuck up and agree to something, or do something blindingly stupid like sign a birth certificate or execute an acknowledgment of paternity. Only a blithering moron would sign this if they are not the biological father.

The very best thing you can do, I think, is be very militant. Very firm positions, agreeing to almost nothing, and going to trial if necessary if her demands are even mildly unreasonable. You have a strong hand and position here.

dober88 · 2025-06-03T08:14:04+00:00

Don’t sign anything. Paternity test. Lawyer up.

Title	Seperated, soon to be ex wife is pregnant with another mans child. How to proceed in court so I don't have to pay child support or spousal support?
Author	Working-Narwhal2114
Upvotes	27
Comments	37
Date	June 3, 2025 8:09 AM UTC (1 year ago)
Subreddit	Posted in /r/Divorce_Men
Original Link	https://old.reddit.com/r/Divorce_Men/comments/1l26cll/seperated_soon_to_be_ex_wife_is_pregnant_with/
Archive Link	https://theredarchive.com/r/Divorce_Men/seperated-soon-to-be-ex-wife-is-pregnant-with.1553802 https://theredarchive.com/post/1553802

Comments

GET. A. LAWYER.