Women and men are viscerally attracted to the same things. The hottest best-looking men and women get the attention of everyone. No amount of extra psychopathy or dark triad traits are going to change a woman's no to a yes. If you meet someone's baseline looks standards, they'll give you a chance and you'll barely have to even try.

On the other hand, men are notoriously known for being obsessed with looks while women are the purehearted narrative-based attraction gender. However, I think it's understated how similar men's experience of attraction is in this regard. Men here have all had that high school crush experience where they were shattered when their overwhelming feelings were not reciprocated. Most of the time, that girl that shatters them isn't the hottest girl in the school. It's some normal girl next door type that they felt like they had a reasonable chance with.

Men and women pretty much deal with the same supply and demand problems as well when it comes to dating. Men and women, when they try to shoot too far out of their league, will both run into "assholes". The truth is everyone's an asshole when they think they can do better. Like I said, with people who actually like you, you barely even have to try. This manifests in you not feeling like you need to do much to maintain a relationship, because you don't, and thus being perceived as an asshole.

It's a big loop. The people you think are less than you, you will treat as disposable. The people you think are better than you, will treat you like you're disposable.