So I am one week out from the divorce decree finalized. My wife weren’t a fast track out of this marriage quick fast and in a hurry. She moved on pretty damn quick. She was on bumble within three months of asking for a divorce and within six months was full on boofing some new dude. I had to do a speed run on emotional detangling and feeling pretty good about it now at a year out. Been working out, taking care of myself, laying down some boundaries in our coparenting relationship, and overall rebuilding my life. Started doing the online dating thing and I’ve gotten a fair number of matches, but nothing that has gone beyond a first meeting date, which I always make low pressure and low stakes. Usually just midday coffees or lunches. I try to be an active listener and not trying to suck up all the oxygen in the room. Just not clicking with any of the ones I’ve matched with so far I met. Some of them have been worth a second date and kept me curious, but they just don’t go anywhere. I haven’t had a click with anyone I’ve met so far and I don’t think that they have either hence why we never get past first meets. Part of me thinks it’s that I was a late bloomer to the parenting game. I am a 55 year-old with two kids age 15 and 12. Women in their 50s that I’ve matched with are empty nesters and I feel they are not particularly in the same place I am at. I’m finding that the ones I match with who do have younger kids seem to still have a lot of entangled issues with exes that make them not particularly emotionally available. Case in point. My most recent lunch date was actually a very nice conversation, close to my age with 13 year old twins. It flowed well and we had a decent back-and-forth. The big red flag for me was that her ex and her were still only separated and this has been going on for four years. She said they’ve just been lazy getting it done but my red flag went up with me thinking laziness doesn’t explain the fact that you two live around the corner from each other and drop in on each other without notice. I clocked that as she’s still not in the headspace to meet another man and see where it goes. But it was still a nice conversation and I liked her enough t9 be curious if chemistry would develop so after getting her number I texted her with an invite to dinner next week. She completely ghosted me. It’s tough out there fellas.