Lately, my focus has been on mastering the concept of treating my wife like a child or, at most, a responsible teenager.

I took her to the bank and restructured our finances. Now, instead of having a joint checking and savings, she had a checking and savings and I manage everything else. This way, her whole paycheck, minus her allowance, is immediately taken away from her and in my sole control. Is my wife a big spender? Nope, she’s great with money. Had my wife been doing a bad job at managing the finances? Nope, she had actually set up a workflow for automatic bill pay and budgeting that maximized our budget and use of credit card rewards. Does that mean she should manage the finances? No, because children don’t manage finances.

When I told her why were going to the bank (while we were en route to the bank) she asked me if she had done something wrong. I told her no, but I was going to manage everything going forward. I laughed at her when she responded that I was making an illogical decision, because she’d work so hard to set up our system. She’s still annoyed, claiming that it was something she enjoyed doing together. At this point I don’t think she’s spent a penny of her allowance because she knows it’s all she has.

I’ve decided it’s time to trade in her car, because I’m sick of driving her to work when it snows. We paid for the car before we were married, so unfortunately her name is on the title. Thankfully, it is an “or” title, so I don’t need her around to sell it off.

I considering asking her for input as she will be the main driver of the vehicle, but I’m not sure if it will cause more pushback related to my financial takeover. This will be different from when we purchased her current car where she took the lead and researched what she wanted and negotiated the deal. I did say no to an AWD, which I’m obviously regretting now.

Is this a mistake? If I do allow input, what is the best way to go about it? How can I set the expectation that I’ll consider what she has to say, but she will not be involved in the decision making and purchasing of the new car?