Are men or women more likely to use sex as a reward/punishment?

Madness20 · 2018-05-27T15:04:50+00:00

Many women inherently see sex as a reward they give to men for being/acting a certain way. Men usually see sex as a reward they want to work for.´ Women don't see sex as a reward because it's not something they feel it's an achievement.

The dynamic is therefore inherently biased from the very source.

Barely-moral · 2018-05-27T16:02:39+00:00

Women use sex/lack of sex as a reward/punishment because women are the gatekeepers of sex.

Men can do the same with commitment.

gmanex · 2018-05-27T15:03:05+00:00

No. Men just WANT sex. Nature programmed them that way. End of story.

TheGreasyPole · 2018-05-27T15:21:44+00:00

Of course women do so, I think it's going to be basically impossible if not incredibly rare for men to do so... because it just doesn't work that way round.

wtknight · 2018-05-27T16:13:42+00:00

Obviously women, because if a man withholds sex from a woman she can just go out and quickly find it with some other man. Most men don't have that option unless they are willing to spend some money for a prostitute, as even Chad has to do some work to find quick sex.

Drippyskippy · 2018-05-27T17:09:03+00:00

Of course women use sex as a reward. Isn't this common knowledge? Its unfortunate, but it is what it is. Sex should be a mutually beneficial activity for 2 loving partners, which sometimes it is. But some women expect you to bend over backwards for them in order to get sex out of it. It isn't how healthy relationships are supposed to work.

Jammerly1 · 2018-05-27T15:48:24+00:00

I mean, in some ways men kind of force you to because they are stubborn and don’t listen well or communicate. If your boyfriend is being an asshole, why would you reward that behavior by contributing to have sex with him? Why would you want to have sex with him? It’s very natural to be a repulsed by a guy who’s not cooperating or getting on your nerves. You have to reinforce the behavior that makes him sexually attractive to you otherwise y’all get lazy and stop trying, leading to deadbedrooms. If men acted largely like adults with good communication skills and took responsibility and initiative in taking care of their wives, women wouldn’t have to.

Mr_Smoogs · 2018-05-27T16:14:49+00:00

If anyone anywhere is using sex as a punishment they are def doing it wrong

shoup88 · 2018-05-27T21:21:42+00:00

I think women are probably more likely to do it. I’m not sure there’s anything wrong with using specific sex acts as a reward, but I do think it’s awful to withhold sex as punishment. It’s so disrespectful to your partner and your relationship.

That’s only if it’s conscious though. If a person is unaware that they are linking good behaviour with sex and bad behaviour with no sex, it could just be that conditions were not met for them to desire or enjoy sex.

Like Jammerly said, if you have to nag after your partner to pick up after themselves you’re not going to want to fuck them. The guy might see this as punishment, but if the woman feels like his mom, she’s going to lose attraction to him.

carefreevermillion · 2018-05-28T20:31:21+00:00

Continual manipulation of your partner through withholding sex is wrong. Whoever the higher sex drive partner is is controlled by their partner's sex drive. This is most often the male that is rewarded through sex, but sometimes it's the female.

kandyapplez · 2018-05-27T16:06:53+00:00

Obviously women because the option simply isn't available for men in the same way. No one views sex with a man as a reward.

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paccount112 · 2018-05-27T15:13:07+00:00

Women would, because no woman would fall for it

Eartherry · 2018-05-27T21:41:08+00:00

Women see sex as neither reward nor punishment. So if she's not having sex it's not a big deal, making not much of a punishment. Men view sex as a reward. He wouldn't be able to punish women by withholding it. And women can't grasp sex as a reward.

So basically men, and men alone, are capable of being rewarded or punished using sex but only because of an unrelated, unintentional mismatch in sex drive.

newName543456 · 2018-05-27T22:21:46+00:00

Women.

Men using it wouldn't even work, because woman could easily get it somewhere else.

gunbusterxl · 2018-05-28T00:35:50+00:00

Not in my experience. In relationships, I’m usually the one holding out on her because I’m just not in the mood. I’ve noticed that I don’t obsess about sex nearly as much as my friends, though.

rainisthelife · 2018-05-27T15:15:19+00:00

Women are the ones more likely.

It is abusive and problematic for me, but I have no say, outside of looking elsewhere if the need is too big.

Title	Are men or women more likely to use sex as a reward/punishment?
Author	Mr_Smoogs
Upvotes	2
Comments	108
Date	May 27, 2018 2:57 PM UTC (8 years ago)
Subreddit	Posted in /r/PurplePillDebate
Original Link	https://old.reddit.com/r/PurplePillDebate/comments/8mi92u/are_men_or_women_more_likely_to_use_sex_as_a/
Archive Link	https://theredarchive.com/r/PurplePillDebate/are-men-or-women-more-likely-to-use-sex-as-a.262213 https://theredarchive.com/post/262213

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