CMV: Becoming a doctor is not a slam dunk for your dating life

Clipsez · 2018-02-19T16:14:08+00:00

No, they’re also just too picky. Now take age into consideration. 18 plus 4 years of college plus 4 years of med school plus 4 years of residency, then consider the fact that many take a few years to train or do a specialty and you’re looking at a guy in his early 30’s.

If you don’t advertise on your profile that you’re a doctor, then you aren’t using it to “slam dunk” you’re dating life. If you don’t want gold diggers, then you have to accept that as a man in his 30’s, you’re going to attract mostly women in their 30’s. Don’t complain about how you are only getting old women who are “post wall”. A 21 year old girl generally wants other 21 year old men, not 31 year old men, unless they have money.
I knew plenty of handsome guys who got into med school
You have to demonstrate a level of social capability to get into med school and get a residency
See # 1. You can get gold diggers but if you aren’t using the doctor thing to show off to women, then you have to accept that the women you attract are going to be the same level as if you weren’t a doctor. A nice lady who is a teacher in her 30’s may date you instead of the nubile young 18 year old.

Also, you can also date other women who are doctors. Edit but she will also be in her early 30’s and “post wall”. Can you handle that disappointment?

goatismycopilot · 2018-02-19T14:31:13+00:00

A lot of the doctors I work with met their partner in med school. But having said that many of them have horrible communication and social skills.

GridReXX · 2018-02-19T14:56:17+00:00

Almost all of my friends are doctors.

None of them are “nerds.”

Being social and being a doctor isn’t mutually exclusive.

Also a lot of med friends met their mates in school or at the hospital.

Littleknownfacts · 2018-02-19T14:42:41+00:00

It's not a slam dunk. There is no one thing you can do to make yourself irresistible to all women. It's all about trying to cut the biggest portion of the pie for yourself that you can. And becoming a doctor gets you a bigger portion than being some middle management cubicle drone.

1) Gotta worry about gold diggers, some guys don't even put they're doctors in their dating profiles

Get off of online dating. Most of the med school students and graduates I know are dating or married to other equally successful women, usually that they met before hand. Most are fairly attractive.

2) You gotta be a total nerd to get into med school. Nerds are very unattractive.

False, it's a very work hard/part hard crowd. You might not hear from them for months, but after finals they are all raging and doing coke.

3) Social skills and life experience do not develop because you're always studying. These guys literally are graduating from school at age 30 and have personalities/confidence of guys 18-22

False. See above.

4) Money and prestige are a boost but they're not huge. I mean it's nice, but it's not going to compensate for other factors.

Correct, it's just a bigger cut of the pie is all.

reluctantly_red · 2018-02-19T15:02:19+00:00

Well no, they want a cute doctor.

Be attractive, don't be unattractive.

Then be rich

pinkgoldrose · 2018-02-19T14:33:33+00:00

Easy: Med schools have more female students than male students. Male med students are drowning in pussy if they can so much as grab it.

[deleted] · 2018-02-19T14:18:40+00:00

3) Social skills and life experience do not develop because you're always studying. These guys literally are graduating from school at age 30 and have personalities/confidence of guys 18-22

I remember Callie Torres saying the same thing in Grey's Anatomy. I thought it was for the show but this confirms it. Interesting.

That said, I think ALL men behave like college kids until they are given or find a reason to act otherwise. Men grow up when they want a family.

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DaphneDK42 · 2018-02-19T14:20:01+00:00

1) Gotta worry about gold diggers, some guys don't even put they're doctors in their dating profiles

The only thing to worry about gold diggers is not putting yourself in a vulnerable position where the fruit of all your work is stolen from you. Otherwise, bang those chicks.

Besides, an honest gold-digger willing to uphold her side of the bargain is a wonderful thing.

3) Social skills and life experience do not develop because you're always studying. These guys literally are graduating from school at age 30 and have personalities/confidence of guys 18-22

If you are looking for a high quality life partner you have to find a woman who are with you on the deal that she marry a younger man, who is currently poor, but with excellent potential. "If you want the wife of an admiral have to marry a lieutenant." Then you have the added benefit of going through the tougher twenties together. If you are 30 before you start to date, you kinda missed the boat on this. One of the pitfalls of a guy who wants to pursue this avenue, is if he sells himself too short. His rmv is not the current student, but the future doctor. I bet a lot of starter-wife scenarios comes from this. He marries a less attractive girl when he was a poor student, and after his career gets flying, he sees he sold himself short, and become resentful and looking to trade up.

Electra_Cute · 2018-02-19T14:20:07+00:00

It probably does not hurt men's chances, why would it?

Scatre · 2018-02-19T14:51:44+00:00

Who cares you are rich

[deleted] · 2018-02-19T15:42:14+00:00

Wealth/status do not carry the same weight they used to. Women are able to support themselves, which is why they're focusing more on raw sexual attraction these days. This trend will only intensify over the coming years.

Jammerly1 · 2018-02-19T15:53:56+00:00

Yeah that kind of lifestyle is not for everyone. I would try and find ambitious upwardly mobile women in the corporate world, like consultants, Finance, Marketing, etc instead of in STEM jobs. They will be impressed by your credentials and decently attractive. If you aren’t obviously weird you have a good shot, because a lot of their peers in Corp are equally as nerdy as doctors, just a lot less money. They will also be smart and polished enough to accompny you into your educated social circle and blend in.

EsauTheRed · 2018-02-19T18:23:07+00:00

If you make money but don't want to use it to attract women, and also aren't particularly attractive, exactly what do you have to show women that you are high quality, what exactly are you doing to attract women?

exit_sandman · 2018-02-19T19:20:26+00:00

Well, nothing is a slam dunk for your dating life unless you got a good "dating personality", except maybe being ridiculously handsome.

jumpjumponitit · 2018-02-19T20:23:46+00:00

This isnt remotely true. Med students party hard and are fitter than the average population. They're not really stereotypically nerdy either. I know this because I'm actually in med school and know a ton of med students at other med schools. Everywhere else here is just hypothesizing.

SkookumTree · 2018-02-19T21:02:58+00:00

Well no shit. It's a multiplier, not an automatic GODMODE ACTIVATED cheat code. And medical school does select for social skills, but inhibited nerdy types are no doubt overrepresented there.

AstuteBlackMan · 2018-02-19T21:42:01+00:00

Did you become a doctor just for pussy?

Dude.

soupladlelad · 2018-02-22T00:56:18+00:00

Even as a medical student, if I mention it it is always seen as a plus. While women may want a man with money and status, it is only because those are indicators of ability. Women want men with ability and physical attraction (largely determined by physical strength and jaw distinction). It also makes you interesting because 1) you do cool shit and 2) social skill development is a huge part of the training

I know numerous doctors now (I'm in my 30s) that have mediocre dating lives.

Are they married? in a relationship? I promise you they are busy as hell with their own lives so they might not prioritize dating.

1) Gotta worry about gold diggers, some guys don't even put they're doctors in their dating profiles

Totally valid point but those guys are looking for a relationship not a lay. They are screening out gold diggers on purpose. When they tell them on date 7 it's gonna give them the power to choose the relationship or not because she will not leave him (less likely at least).

2) You gotta be a total nerd to get into med school. Nerds are very unattractive.

There is some truth to this. The average IQ in med school is 130 and the biggest predictor of success in med school if the big five personality trait of conscientousness. However, emotional intellegence and social skills are massively important for success as a doctor and receiving ever increasing emphasis.

3) Social skills and life experience do not develop because you're always studying. These guys literally are graduating from school at age 30 and have personalities/confidence of guys 18-22

This I can't deny and it fits my experience accurately. However, that ability to study means an ability to rapidly develop skills including social skills.

4) Money and prestige are a boost but they're not huge. I mean it's nice, but it's not going to compensate for other factors.

Well yeah bro but if you have a cool job that pays fat cash all you have to do is lift (like every guy), dress well (like every guy, and easier with that wallet) and you are golden. This has been my experience. I am in a slow part of med school now as I wait for my next training assignment. I have been paying more attention to my social skills, style, and fitness. I've been doing well with female attention but I don't date because I'm still too busy for that shit.

Title	CMV: Becoming a doctor is not a slam dunk for your dating life
Author	zenplus
Upvotes	1
Comments	104
Date	February 19, 2018 2:15 PM UTC (8 years ago)
Subreddit	Posted in /r/PurplePillDebate
Original Link	https://old.reddit.com/r/PurplePillDebate/comments/7ymwr7/cmv_becoming_a_doctor_is_not_a_slam_dunk_for_your/
Archive Link	https://theredarchive.com/r/PurplePillDebate/cmv-becoming-a-doctor-is-not-a-slam-dunk-for-your.263535 https://theredarchive.com/post/263535

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