Q4BP, what is your opinion of this r/relationships posts regarding an alpha boyfriend and her greedy girlfriend?

Electra_Cute · 2017-12-27T11:46:14+00:00

That was an awful creative writing exercise.

louplop · 2017-12-27T10:51:23+00:00

First... I think this posts are fake.

Second, what does make you sick ? Those two persons were not compatible in term of what makes her happy. That's why she suffered. Now he seems to have a lot going for him that's why she struggles. Imagine (let's go with stereotype) a perfect 20 yo beauty. You fuck her daily but learn she cheat on you every week-end. I hope for you you'll dump her.

Now, you're alone in your bed with your dick in your hand... and you think "did I fuck up?" you remember her nice tits and her perfect smile and regret.... does it make you entitled ? no... you two would just not be compatible. No matter how amazing she is, if she wants to suck a new dick every week-end, you most likely aren't meant to be together

theambivalentrooster · 2017-12-27T12:19:06+00:00

Well my first thought is why does anyone want to be in a relationship with someone that doesn't actually want a relationship and all that it entails?

I agree with the sentiment here that this story is almost certainly fake and a creative writing exercise to push the TRP agenda. Rich stoic lone wolf alpha male with greedy hysterical hyperagmous female and all.

Besides that, homegirl was free to leave the relationship at any time. If she wanted to bang her head on the door of her cheap emotionally unavailable boyfriend, that's on her.

It's not weird or 'entitled' of her to expect him to want to spend money on her. That's generally what people who like each other do. He's not obligated to, of course. She should have left when she realized he wasn't going to change because she's not getting what she wanted out of the relationship.

SecSlab · 2017-12-27T16:26:21+00:00

Tbh that guy sounds insufferable and entitled himself and I am puzzled why anyone would want to date him for an LTR. It’s not entitled to want a guy to pay for dinner sometimes or feel upset when he gets lavish gifts for other people but doesn’t want to get you a nice gift even though you’re his SO.

You complain about “Western women” but the thing is, that sweet Asian waifs who you dream of comes from a very traditional background where is a STAY AT HOME MOM. She has MARRIAGE and is LEGALLY BOUND to her husband and also he is financially supporting the kids and wife. Would you be willing to do that? If not, you are better off with a “dirty liberal western woman” who doesn’t want marriage herself and just wants you around for sex.

Finally, if the genders were switched, TRP would be calling the woman post wall, insufferable, feminist, etc.

aznphenix · 2017-12-27T17:27:46+00:00

Most of the comments are just saying they’re incompatible which is absolutely true.

(Also oh my god these posts are really funny stuff.

He’s also into fashion; especially some obscure Japanese designers that nobody has ever heard that make these black clothes that make you look like a Vampire or something.

Yup totally real and not the fevered dreams of a human Cheeto.)

SmurfESmurferson · 2017-12-27T16:33:23+00:00

A) It's a fake post

B) They're incompatible, best to break up

C) He's behaving like a selfish douche

aznphenix · 2017-12-27T10:43:04+00:00

Why does that make you sick? From what I've read the bf doesn't care much about her beyond possibly having someone he can occasionally have at (their?) home. It's weird for most people to be in a relationship like that. He's not gonna change probably, she should leave.

buartha · 2017-12-27T13:04:58+00:00

While there were comments on these (clearly fake) posts that attacked Marc, the majority of the most upvoted comments were just telling her to leave him due to the fact that he wouldn't commit to her and didn't love her. This seems pretty accurate from her telling of the story and would be advice that I'd give to anyone whose goals were incompatible with their partner's (obviously the best advice would 'build a time machine and don't try to change his mind for more than 6 months,' but she doesn't seem like the techy type.)

There were even some comments sympathising with him across the 3 posts that garnered some positive attention, so I don't see the response as being as one sided as you seem to think it is.

Bonus inclusion of my favourite quote from the whole thing

Marc told me after we talked about the surgery and the burial that he went to see the vet and the mortician himself to take care of it via a fund that was set up by one of his companies (I apologize that I don’t know specifics since I’m not too familiar with finance) and he said he wanted to use this fund’s assets to cover these matters and asked to stay anonymous

Uhhh

WestsideMoonWalker · 2017-12-27T11:02:00+00:00

Looks fake. Nobody actually sounds like that irl. Someone being that detached as a partner is pretty shitty though. I'd be outta there if the person I was with was that detached. Generally, I'd expect the more wealthy partner (if it's by a fairly significant margin) to at least chip in financially or do nice things for their partner with the money they have, assuming that is their relationship dynamic. In an exclusive long term relationship, generally this is true.

Notice that this isn't gendered. Honestly, if my girlfriend was outearning me by a significant margin (say at least double of what I make), I'd expect her to use a little of that to treat me occasionally. It's only fair and I would do the same. Two people on a similar income should generally split or treat each other equally.

Also, that TRP posts literally makes that shit reek of absolute bs.

Admittedly, my views on money are molded by my family, who has always seen having money as a responsibility to do social good. I am definitely quite generous when I can spare it, and I see financial selfishness as a dealbreaker in a partner. I don't mind someone being thrifty or even cheap, but selfishness is a whole other ballgame. It's indicative of selfishness in other realms of life, and people's attitudes of finances are often extreme relative to the other parts of of their lives.

a_mans_perspective · 2017-12-27T10:54:39+00:00

This is some turbo bullshit dude. No woman goes online and writes "how do I cope with my incredibly wealthy successful boyfriend who socializes expertly, has had millions of adventures yet simultaneously is aloof, independent and puts me in my place????"

These kinds of posts are written by men, in order to prove a point. Observe how closely the fake male lead character resembles TRP. He's a TRP platonic ideal male. If the dude who wrote this is not from TRP, he is at least part of the manosphere, like a PUA or something.

chasingstatues · 2017-12-27T17:07:15+00:00

The dude doesn't want a relationship. He doesn't want marriage or even cohabitation. He never treated her like a partner or first mate or any of that. She's just a plate and she knows it. Of course that's not going to work for her, or any woman, long term. She was probably hoping he would change, invite her more into his life, have more regard for her opinions, etc. If he's just going to keep treating her like she's a prostitute, he can't expect her to stick around when he ain't payin.

pinkgoldrose · 2017-12-27T12:39:35+00:00

He doesn't want kids, why is she with him? She's basically a prostitute who's not getting paid. I don't see the point.

Other than that, I actually relate to the man. When I had boyfriends, I was indifferent if I was not going to see them for months. It didn't change anything for me. I also took faraway exotic trips without them. The reason I did that is that I had niche interests that I knew my boyfriends wouldn't enjoy (shitty third world travel and/or cold weather) and couldn't afford (plane tickets to remote locations and mountaineering costs). Plus we were still young and in the early stages of our relationship, so I didn't think it was up to me to plan their vacation.

It caused problems with my last boyfriend because he wanted me to text him every day, he wanted to know where I was all the time and he wanted me with him all year long. I did not maintain my frame because, well, I'm not domineering at all, and he sort of convinced me that I was in the wrong and he made me feel bad about even going to the gym, and so I ended up cancelling my cool life for him and to fit better in his no-life life. It sucked.

So good on him for keeping his cool life intact, but something's missing. Even when I was independent from my boyfriends, I gave them all the sex they wanted, I took them on cool activities that they wouldn't have been able to afford, I gave them a genuine emotional connexion (making them my number 1 person), I considered them part of my family, and I was willing to have children and share my money with them later in life.

This man is giving her nothing at all. It's fine if he wants to keep his finances separate, but he's not pulling the emotional weight. It should be sex for emotion or kids for kids. She's just his free prostitute.

Princeso_Bubblegum · 2017-12-27T16:38:57+00:00

Bloopers, what is your response to this story?

I can't tell you how little I care.

SpaceWhiskey · 2017-12-27T20:58:13+00:00

Well, it does matter if the story is fake, because if the female OP was specifically created by a man to get a certain reaction from the community’s users and got them, all you’ve “proven” is that under the perfect circumstances, you’ll get those comments.

Let’s assume it’s real though. Why does it make you sick? Why do you describe the woman as “greedy”? The boyfriend sounds like he could use some therapy, it’s a red flag to be that emotionally unavailable, and the elaborate hoops he ends up jumping through to secretly help her family is all just.... something else. That’s not well-adjusted behavior. Both the man and woman sound like characters in a bad romance novel, they’re both way too immature and bad at communicating for the relationship to be healthy.

[deleted] · 2017-12-28T04:43:06+00:00

“You never spend money on me,”

He proceeds to pay for the funeral.

Haha

goatismycopilot · 2017-12-27T11:26:19+00:00

It does matter if it is fake because there are a lot of fake posts on the relationships sub used to illustrate a moral of the story. I mean the guy told her he does not want to get married, have kids, and everything is 50/50 even if he makes 8 million bucks a year and she makes 40K so the answer is non fake GF should end it with non fake millionaire guy.

AutoModerator · 2017-12-27T10:29:23+00:00

Attention!

You can post off topic/jokes/puns as a comment to this Automoderator message.
For "CMV" and "Question for X" Threads: Parent comments that aren't from the target group will be removed, along with their child replies.
If you want to agree with OP instead of challenging their view or if the question is not targeted at you, post it as an answer to this comment.
OP you can choose your own flair according to these guidelines., just press Flair under your post!

Thanks for your cooperation and enjoy the discussion!

I am a bot, and this action was performed automatically. Please contact the moderators of this subreddit if you have any questions or concerns.

Xholica · 2017-12-27T12:40:56+00:00

It sounds fake. If I had a boyfriend and I always made sure to let him know my availability (I'll be busy for the next fortnight) I'd be pretty upset if he booked a monthlong holiday without telling me. And she couldn't be grateful for money he spent on her family when he didn't tell her.

On the flipside she got into a relationship that was very different to her idea of one. He treated her more like a FWB than a girlfriend in some ways after telling her he could imagine an exclusive relationship with her and they were incompatible from the get go. She agreed to terms that she kept expecting to change and was constantly surprised when they didn't. While he talked in terms of keeping things separate she sounds like she was more desperate for a typical relationship. It's easy to resent someone when you're struggling, they tell you they care about you and they could help you with it costing them very little relatively speaking.

I'm not going to call golddigger, she did stick around for 2+ years, but I do think that she was equating money with affection. It sounds like it bothered her a bit from the beginning. However when he paid for his sister's holiday, it switched from him not spending money on others which was semi-okay, to her feeling like he didn't care enough about her to spend money on her which was less okay with her.

wtknight · 2017-12-27T14:54:01+00:00

Assuming that this story is true, she should obviously make a decision whether she agrees with his terms for the relationship and is happy with them or whether she dislikes the manner in which this guy expresses his desire for a connection (or lack of connection) with her, and then proceed to next the guy. Posting about her situation on a Reddit sub and emphasizing this guy's money while wanting advice from others seems strange and lends credence to the idea that these are troll posts.

SkookumTree · 2017-12-28T02:57:26+00:00

This is bullshit, these two are not compatible at all and the guy seems too solitary for her. She doesn't want money, she wants companionship, and this dude's not giving it. He needs to either live the bachelor life or get with a woman that's solitary and intense as fuck like him. And has some money.

justhanging92 · 2017-12-29T05:30:40+00:00

Reagardless if the story is fake or not, this makes me wonder the validity of alpha game and what maintaining frame means for the longevity of the relationship. Sure she was super attached to the guy but she just sounds miserable because of 5he lack of beta, it’s kinda no wonder a lot of bloops would call the red pill abusive.

Plopolok · 2017-12-27T12:01:56+00:00

I'm not BP, but I find it a little bit jerky to want a LTR that won't lead to marriage or children. At least he was open about it and she agreed, but still, where's the love? How long did he plan to keep this going? She had to leave at some point, I can sympathize with her. Of course she's not entitled to get the man of her dreams, but it's never easy when someone you like doesn't like you enough.

Also, as others said, it's very probably a fake.

[deleted] · 2017-12-27T14:55:15+00:00

This dude dodged a bullet there maintaining his frame, I know a girl that was dating a similar man, she was cheating with a coworker a month after they got married.

Title	Q4BP, what is your opinion of this r/relationships posts regarding an alpha boyfriend and her greedy girlfriend?
Author	throwawaynuke91
Upvotes	18
Comments	151
Date	December 27, 2017 10:29 AM UTC (8 years ago)
Subreddit	Posted in /r/PurplePillDebate
Original Link	https://old.reddit.com/r/PurplePillDebate/comments/7meagv/q4bp_what_is_your_opinion_of_this_rrelationships/
Archive Link	https://theredarchive.com/r/PurplePillDebate/q4bp-what-is-your-opinion-of-this-rrelationships.264345 https://theredarchive.com/post/264345

Comments