In regards to the value of sexual intercourse, what are your views?

Orange_Paisley · 2019-10-22T16:00:49+00:00

It’s recreational, a bonding mechanism, a stress reliever and a tool to create intimacy all at once. It’s also good for making babies or so I have heard.

[deleted] · 2019-10-22T17:06:44+00:00

My H and I waited a few dates to make sure we were really clicking. (To the dubious folks, I paid my own tab.) I was raised loosely Christian and taught you should save yourself for someone special. At some point I determined I wanted to sleep around when I was a young teenager, because teenagers are often brilliant thinkers. I'm grateful that extreme introversion got in the way of that; in hindsight, it wouldn't have been a smart move for me.

Sex is extremely valuable. It's the closest you can get to another human being physically and, if you allow yourself, emotionally and mentally as well. It can be transcendent. It's a point of intense vulnerability. All of these are reasons I came to balk at the idea of having sex with lots of people. I hated the idea of giving another person power over me when I couldn't divine their end game.

Just my two cents.

yes_i_am_dumb · 2019-10-22T16:24:53+00:00

People like to fuck, its normal and not a huge deal. tbh i would prefer if a future LTR/wife wanted to fuck me on the first date/meeting

I’m 27, if a girl my age said she had been with say 5 guys before me, i would think thats fairly normal (low side if anything) and wouldnt judge at all

If she told me shes legitimately fucked say 3000 guys i would definitely rule her out for a LTR

So there is a limit somewhere there, idk where exactly it is but at a certain point their n count becomes a concern / deal breaker

whibbleymoondanc · 2019-10-22T18:12:00+00:00

Sex is like eating. It can be intimately, spiritual, down and dirty, or in a group. There are so many ways to have sex. I’ve had everything from one night stands and threesomes to intimate love making with my wife and marathon sex sessions lasting hours. It isn’t just one thing and it depends on who you are with when you are doing it. I’ve made love to my wife and I’ve raw fucked my wife. I’ve made her the focus of pleasure and I’ve made me the focus.

SmurfESmurferson · 2019-10-22T17:04:29+00:00

It has whatever weight I give to any particular encounter. The emotional intimacy and expectations will not be the same in a STR and a LTR

geyejoe7 · 2019-10-22T18:07:12+00:00

I'm from a European country (M18), so my views might differ.

The value of sex for ME is very big. I am not religious, so waiting for marriage isn't a thing for me.

However, I do see their point.

While that is, I think sex should be had with a partner in what is planned to be a LTR. Studies have proven that women have the greatest quality of sex, while in a relationship.

This is because when your feelings mix with the physical aspect, you get a wonderful combination.

And for men it's great too, because they want women who are loyal.

I disagree with the claim that sex is purely a physical thing. I think it can be much more then that.

Reisiluu · 2019-10-22T19:54:53+00:00

It's for experiencing and expressing deep romantic feelings with someone you date exclusively and long term.

Atlas_B_Shruggin · 2019-10-22T15:56:16+00:00

in the emancipated SMP this is up to the individuals personal values, theres no overarching societal value

Eastuss · 2019-10-22T15:47:13+00:00

Sounds like SP vs SJ

TrueReligionGenes · 2019-10-22T15:53:03+00:00

Its everything and nothing at the same damn time

RF111164 · 2019-10-22T16:40:59+00:00

Others still will encourage having sex whenever with whoever in order to gain more experience for an eventual long term partner, or simply because “why not?”.

what? lol what?

goneaway2thewind · 2019-10-22T18:24:53+00:00

I physically can't get turned on by someone I didn't feel a deep emotional bond with. When I know she's the one though, I unleash an animal inside that is so primal and passionate that I've been told was the best fuck in their lives.

wtknight · 2019-10-22T18:47:25+00:00

It should be a tool to express love. Exploring sexual compatibility and gaining experience are unimportant reasons to have sex and show that people place way too much importance on sex.

[deleted] · 2019-10-22T19:48:09+00:00

Sex is a huge priority for me. I told my husband when we were dating that a vibrant sexual relationship is one of the most important factors to me. I have a high libido and need frequent sex to feel close and connected in a relationship. We had sex pretty early on. He was also of the mentality that testing for sexual incompatibility was important for determining long term potential because bad sex runs marriages. Of course as we get old things could come up that alter our sexual relationship but we value sex so highly we are committed to working around any potential future roadblocks.

[deleted] · 2019-10-22T22:10:57+00:00

Sex is an act of love and the most intimate way to show that love. It is not for strangers.

[deleted] · 2019-10-22T23:22:17+00:00

I believe sex is an inherently intimate act, it's when you're at your most vulnerable. However in practice I've mainly only had sex just to say I did it, wasn't really a whole lot of intimacy or bonding. I imagine sex is better with people you're emotionally connected to, but I haven't ever experienced that so I can't say for certain.

CosmicBioHazard · 2019-10-23T12:26:02+00:00

in order to gain more experience for an eventual long term partner.

The type of people who make good long-term commitments versus the type of people who would sleep with you right away is such that getting a lot of experience would only really serve to make you resent your long-term partner for being boring.

MuleFool42 · 2019-10-23T17:57:50+00:00

It's way overrated and should not interfere with your goals. Focus on your own individual success and accomplishments. Work on what you want to achieve for yourself.

Sex is fun but it's not the key to happiness, personal growth and individual success is a better predictor.

FabioAbdilla · 2019-10-24T10:37:24+00:00

Personally I can't see sex as something on its own but in relation to the bigger picture. There are correlations, statistics and facts associated with sex.

slavicgypsygirl · 2019-10-24T23:53:18+00:00

"Everything is about sex except sex. Sex is about power"

This is a quote a man from another sub shared with me that I totally agree with

Gravel_Roads · 2019-10-22T15:58:22+00:00

To me, sex is just an intimate social interaction. It comes with plenty of dangers and downfalls for either gender if done carelessly, but it also comes with a lot of pleasure. Most people I enjoy a coffee and conversation with is someone I’d also enjoy shagging. Most people I can’t even enjoy a conversation with is probably someone I also wouldn’t want to put my dick in.

But I’m also bi and walk in really laid back, sex positive circles, so that sort of mentality is common for me. I’ve fucked most of my friends at least once out of curiosity

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disposablepurplepill · 2019-10-23T15:46:59+00:00

It's really valuable to me but at the same time I don't negotiate with terrorists. I'll never "bargain" for physical intimacy. This also means I have to end a relationship if the bargaining comes to the table because threatening to end the relationship can be considered coercion by society.

You bring quid pro quo into the equation you just ended it without realizing it.

I think only one of my relationships ended this way though.

Title	In regards to the value of sexual intercourse, what are your views?
Author	finch2200
Upvotes	5
Comments	62
Date	October 22, 2019 3:41 PM UTC (6 years ago)
Subreddit	Posted in /r/PurplePillDebate
Original Link	https://old.reddit.com/r/PurplePillDebate/comments/dljofd/in_regards_to_the_value_of_sexual_intercourse/
Archive Link	https://theredarchive.com/r/PurplePillDebate/in-regards-to-the-value-of-sexual-intercourse-what.292281 https://theredarchive.com/post/292281

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