How many of you ladies are childfree?

NurseBubbleGum · 2020-08-14T00:07:52+00:00

I have 1 child. His dad is low value. I put up with him for 7 years. I woke up one morning realizing he never cared about me, I was just his meal ticket, and I hated my life.The moment I dropped his ass, I sought after career opportunities that I had previously never felt good enough for, and now I make six figures, tripling his income 😎. Turns out, you can reach higher when you drop the dead weight. Currently teaching my son what it is to be a high value man and how to respect women. I love my life now. Thank God for that literal wake up.

Dating is okay, not the best, but have met some decent candidates while being a single mom. We ultimately had different wants, but decent men. There are also A LOT of men who think I'm good enough to try to screw, but don't want to be a "dad" as if any of them could even take care of themselves.

randomgirlimok · 2020-08-13T23:37:38+00:00

I think many women who do want kids put up with LVM because they really want a family and end up settling. So they are not on this sub.

supremelyparanoid · 2020-08-13T23:26:11+00:00

[deleted]

LadyGrimes · 2020-08-14T00:46:06+00:00

I'm infertile and would have liked to have a kid with my late husband. But my kids are my pets.

herbstzeit · 2020-08-14T02:33:41+00:00

I (early 20s) used to want children really bad, like 3+ children, but now I'm undecided and angling towards not wanting kids ever unless I find a man who would share responsibilities well and be an actual partner. Which seems... very unlikely. I honestly have given up on men for now lol. I started dating after 18 and realized that a lot of men want kids, but do not want to contribute at all. They're just concerned about "muh legacy" or having a son.

I wanted kids until I saw multiple women in my life -- friends, relatives-- end up with NVM and go from vibrant, driven people to shells of themselves because they have screaming child(ren) and/or a manchild attached to them driving them into the ground. I saw women have kids and then be cheated on, abused by NVMs and their pickme female relatives, and financially destroyed too. It just does not seem worth it.

night_glitter · 2020-08-13T23:54:04+00:00

Yeah, I’ve known I was childfree for over a decade. It did make dating more challenging, being in the South where some of my contemporaries were grandmas before they turn 40. I think it’s more popular now to be CF, and I’m towards the end of a gal’s best fertility years anyway, so I assume most men around my age will already have children if they want them, or they’ll want them ASAP. I’m fixed anyway, so there’s no “you still have time” anymore arguing.

lvioletsnow · 2020-08-13T23:14:40+00:00

[deleted]

chateauduchat · 2020-08-14T01:39:12+00:00

Oh my goodness I’m surprised but I’m happy to see a large number of us are childfree. I’m not looking into dating for a long time and I know I’ll be discouraged to date because I feel like the rare childfree men that are out there who also want commitment are almost nonexistent.

judyfoody · 2020-08-13T23:13:03+00:00

How has it been dating childfree? I'm childfree but I'm not currently dating and I have the same worry

trettles · 2020-08-14T05:55:55+00:00

I’m a childfree and just got sterilised! Pregnancy and childbirth make a woman incredibly vulnerable physically, emotionally, and financially. I refuse to get caught up in any of that. Besides, the world is fucked and too dangerous to bring children into it.

throwaway23004345 · 2020-08-14T02:08:51+00:00

I might sponsor or adopt a kid when I’m older but I will never give birth. No man is worth going through labor pains, carrying a baby and bleeding for a month after. No thanks

hikurangi2019 · 2020-08-14T04:54:34+00:00

My last boyfriend wanted kids but he can’t even clean up or cook a proper meal. I would like a family with the white picket fence but I don’t wanna end up like all those poor women having to look after kids by herself and a man child.

tellmesomething11 · 2020-08-13T23:40:40+00:00

I am not child free but I had planned to be. I got very sick when I was 29 and my insurance covered IVF (a lot of companies do it nowadays but ten years ago it was really unheard of) so I felt pressured to do it. I ended up with twins. My ex husband tried his hardest to make me have more kids but I refused.

Hahane · 2020-08-14T11:56:39+00:00

I feel I can have a child only with a HVM. If there isn't one, then no children.

sadocapitalist · 2020-08-14T12:03:07+00:00

I don't do things I can't walk away from if needed. Kids are a big no for me.

passionatevirtuoso · 2020-08-14T05:00:10+00:00

Childfree here.

99% of men who say they are childfree mean they are either 1) 'Childfree' right NOW and expect you to change your mind... 2) 'Childfree' because they don't want to get married/have a long-term relationship... 3) 'Childfree' because they have very difficult mental or physical problems or 4) 'Childfree' because they have kids but they don't take care of them.

It freaking sucks. :(

FDSxMuffinVSrat · 2020-08-14T06:38:08+00:00

I think there's sampling bias here. I think more childfree women are going to be interested in answering this question.

2020-08-14T11:50:51+00:00

I have an 8 year old son, I’ve been on my own with him for seven years, largely through my own choice. It is possible to be a single parent and be happy and have a great life, it’s really not all struggle and hardship. Having a child has also been the most levelling up experience for me, all my energy and patience goes to my child, I do not have any for a LVM. There simply is no space in my life now for a man that doesn’t bring something special to the table.

wondertarget · 2020-08-14T03:03:21+00:00

Child-free. I'm open to having ONE kid, but if it doesn't happen, it doesn't happen. I am perfectly fine with being the bougie rich Aunt who travels and brings her godchildren back tons of gifts from abroad.

supremelyparanoid · 2020-08-14T05:28:46+00:00

So many more childfree women on this sub than I originally thought

Summerisle7 · 2020-08-14T15:25:30+00:00

I have one child and she's legit the best thing that ever happened to me, I can't imagine life without her. She was unplanned and her father was very LV and he put both of us through hell. Sometimes I wish I'd had a child with someone else instead but then it wouldn't be the exact same child, lol. What I do wish is that I'd dumped him years earlier than I did. Being a single mom was pretty great, we were safe and happy and our home was all ours.

eloiselmao · 2020-08-14T16:46:23+00:00

I haven’t ever been maternal myself but I also really don’t want children due to the fear of instability later on in a relationship with a man. Children naturally challenge even the most stable of relationships and I would be worried to become a single mum because the dad walks out. I just don’t want to put myself in that scenario I guess. Also would be very satisfied with a good career and travelling- perhaps a HVM aha

2020-08-14T20:08:50+00:00

I did want children when I was younger. But I’ve come to change my mind over the years. One of my reasons is I don’t think I can handle the responsibility of a child by myself right along with my job and career. I would need a competent HV partner. But I’m starting to learn that I’d have better luck finding unicorns in the wild. Having a child with a LVM is a big NO for me. I have considered that maybe when I’m older, more established and financially well off, I might adopt one.

The second reason has to do with global warming and climate change. I’m concerned about the future of this planet and am not comfortable leaving an offspring behind who would have to face the consequences of all the damage done.

2020-08-14T03:12:33+00:00

I don't want bio kids but I am not against the idea of adoption. I don't believe there are men with the same kind of mindset for non-creepy reasons out there though, so I'll probably end up alone.

2020-08-14T06:10:01+00:00

I’m 27 and really want kids. My dad passed before I turned 18 and I badly want my children to have a dad who was as great as mine but I feel like I want to settle down soon and am not even close to finding that. Sigh.

Title	How many of you ladies are childfree?
Author	skelly5515
Upvotes	51
Comments	46
Date	August 13, 2020 11:07 PM UTC (5 years ago)
Subreddit	Posted in /r/FemaleDatingStrategy
Original Link	https://old.reddit.com/r/FemaleDatingStrategy/comments/i9ahte/how_many_of_you_ladies_are_childfree/
Archive Link	https://theredarchive.com/r/FemaleDatingStrategy/how-many-of-you-ladies-are-childfree.66691 https://theredarchive.com/post/66691

Comments