What is your perspective on the value of sex

wtknight · 2020-07-16T18:56:41+00:00

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SaBahRub · 2020-07-16T19:15:56+00:00

Sexlessness whining is annoying and inspires no sympathy because there’s so much catering to it already. Entire industries !

You want dates? There’s bars, services, meetups, word of mouth and OLD

You want an enhanced wank? Porn everywhere

Human interaction? Cam girls, only fans, streamers, strippers, social media

A “sexual relationship”? Sugar babies and prostitutes

The only thing you can’t and never will be able to buy is love

TotalTravesty · 2020-07-16T19:39:50+00:00

I haven’t hung around people who hype sex as one of the best things you can experience that’s tied to my personal value since high school.

When I was sexless, it wasn’t so much the sex I missed as much as the other stuff (intimacy, closeness, blah blah blah). If I just wanted to stick my penis in a woman, there are professionals for that. And if I wanted an orgasm, well, I’ve always been in control of that and the imagination is a hell of a thing.

Still, as the years went on, I developed my life and realize there are far more things worthy of my effort—like being a self-sufficient adult. I don’t care how “primal” the urge was, at a certain point it became impossible for me to live JUST for sex. And wouldn’t you know it, that’s when I became more sexually attractive.

Now, sex is great but it’s also messy, requires grooming, you’ve gotta take care of your partner...it’s a whole thing. A whole NICE thing, but sometimes you just want to cum efficiently and sleep.

But I digress. Bottom line: the lack of a partner was what was frustrating, not the lack of the specific act that can be bought or replaced no problem.

NarniaFox · 2020-07-16T19:06:26+00:00

Sex is just a part of life as well as everything else people do day to day. It isn't necessary, it isn't life threatening and it isn't that important to tie to it all your value and motivation.

I get that for a person who can't get it it becomes a holy grail, but they also see the problem of their attitude themselves.

I don't stop people from seeking sex, but I wouldn't like being around guys who are obsessed with it either. I had some experience with a guy who desperately tried to loose his virginity till the school graduation and although he was quite okay before becoming obsessed, he became just intolerable when he was trying to bang at least someone.

wtknight · 2020-07-16T19:21:11+00:00

Men don’t crave for sex. They crave for attraction. Sex can just be had with a prostitute or an escort. So all of the “sex is a need” arguments are BS from the beginning. The real issue is men wanting to feed their egos by being considered attractive by women, and definitely nobody is entitled to that. Women’s minds can’t be controlled to think that men who are unattractive are attractive. This is something that men have to work for. And yeah, it’s unfair that some people are genetically more attractive or taught to be more attractive when they are younger or whatever, but life isn’t fair. Those who are less blessed have to work to make up for it. Attraction has to be earned.

flamingoinghome · 2020-07-16T20:10:18+00:00

Even attractive people who are super-obsessed with racking up casual sex EXP points are creeps. Yes. They are creepy creeps who creep me out. I personally believe sex without affection is gross, and I'm opposed to people pursuing it. For physical contact, there are nonsexual ways of getting that, and for orgasm, there is masturbation.

intersIn · 2020-07-16T19:37:27+00:00

Of course your going to seek it out yet you guys seem to frame sex motivated people as creeps or bad people but, if they are honest why stop them?

The key here is if they are honest why stop them. it's the dishonesty that makes them creeps. Nothing wrong with wanting sex as long as you are upfront about what you want or expect from this person. If said person doesn't want the same thing, lying to them to is shitty. Also means you don't have options, and lying to them is the only way you will ever get sex. If you had options you could just next them and find someone who wants casual sex.

You guys seem almost opposed to someone trying to get more sex despite looks.

It's the unrealistic expectations and fabricated lies that an ugly dude who is a 2 should or is getting an 8, 9, 10. There not. Ugly ppl fuck ugly ppl, attractive ppl fuck attractive ppl. Self improvement will help you go from a 2 to a 4, but you are setting yourself up for failure if you think a 4 should get you an 8,9,10.

Tricksterspider · 2020-07-16T19:44:44+00:00

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akaean · 2020-07-16T20:36:19+00:00

1)as a primal urge I want it and

We all have primal urges. I have primal urges, the women I date have primal urges. The issue here is that sex is a two way street and it requires consent of both people. There is no such thing as a unilateral access to sex. Whenever I have sex it must be with a woman who consents to that sex and vice versa.

There is nothing wrong with feeling a primal urge to have sex. The problem comes when people focus solely on that primal urge and start believing that other people's rights to bodily autonomy are not as important as that urge being filled.

2)sex may not be Everything but, imagine something you've never done before,EVERYONE hypes it up as one of the best things you can experience, and they've ingrained in your head that your value is tied to it.

This is actually a problem with society in general. Shaming surrounding sex is a big part of our culture, and its something that many people believe should actually be changed. Men should never be shamed for having too few sexual partners and likewise women should never be shamed for having too many. Many places, including many left leaning spaces too frequently use incel as an insult.

I saw a /r/politics article speaking about Stephen Miller and one poster said that he "looks like an incel" Stephen Miller is a white supremacist and hatemonger and I have no good to say about him, but accusing him of being an incel is still problematic because it creates an association with bad men with being unsuccessful with women. It is problematic in the same way that I would be wrong to insult Kelly Ann Conway by calling her a slut- there is a lot of problems with Kelly Ann Conway, but how many men she sleeps with is not one of them.

While I cannot speak for every person on the blue pill, I think many of us would emphasize that sex being as hyped up as it is... is really part of the problem.

Of course your going to seek it out yet you guys seem to frame sex motivated people as creeps or bad people but, if they are honest why stop them?

It isn't about whether or not they are trying to seek out sex, but how they are trying to seek out sex. It is possible to work on improving yourself and have more success with women and also not being a misogynistic creep. The Red Pill is not the only way to have relationships with women. If you believe that it is, you have been lied to.

As to your question of why stop them? The point here is that when people are espousing problematic or misogynistic views, they should be called out on that. Maybe they don't know what they are saying is harmful. Maybe someone else can learn why a certain belief is toxic or not supported by the evidence. Maybe we can actually have an honest dialogue about the misogyny inherent to the red pill without being accused of "trying to frame sex motivated people as creeps"

You guys seem almost opposed to someone trying to get more sex despite looks. P.s. as a little side note the way people here see relationships seems really selfish for some reason maybe I'm being naive.

Careful. PPD has a no incel rule. So be careful with generalizations that rely on incel theories like lookism if you want to post here.

CuriousIncel2 · 2020-07-16T19:00:48+00:00

Sex (and women by extension) is like money.

something you've never done before,EVERYONE hypes it up as one of the best things you can experience, and they've ingrained in your head that your value is tied to it

Then you get it and realize it's not the answer. And you're not "happy" like you thought you would be.

Hopefully, at this point you look inwards to take responsibility and not outward to lay blame.

Slyfer_Seven · 2020-07-16T19:31:44+00:00

Sex is very important, but not something that should be pursued to the detriment of yourself. Sex motivated people (who often sound desperate when the actions taken are described) and the lengths they'll go, at expense of their self respect is cringey, even if they're honest.

That said, I don't think anyone is actively trying to stop them, just no one (on the "blue" side) is encouraging them or helping them out.

gopher_glitz · 2020-07-17T04:20:30+00:00

Sex is like air, it's only a big deal if you're not getting any.

spacechicken1990 · 2020-07-17T05:10:28+00:00

It's something I learned from dating an asexual, I used to tie my self worth/confidence to my partner wanting to fuck me/sex. What I realised is I can find validation for confidence in other ways and someone wanting to fuck me or not is not an indicator of my value.

Now I'm a sexual person so a relationship without sex is pretty dismal in some ways, but that isnt so much the lack if sex more the lack of intimacy. Bodily/sexual intimacy is what differentiates a romantic relationships from a platonic one.

CrossfadeAMV · 2020-07-17T05:56:30+00:00

Sex is fun. But overselled.

Bench pressing, eating pizza or chilling in a park is also fun.

I believe people who do not get sex mystify this experience. Which is understandable.

xFallacyx69 · 2020-07-16T18:59:42+00:00

I’ve said “sex isn’t all that” and it’s kind of the same as “money doesn’t buy happiness”... it’s impossible to see that perspective without experiencing it.

No one is entitled to sex is a great sentiment... and toxic women love to throw that phrase around, but I’d love to see how they would react after being in a committed relationship for 5-10 years and the guy says “I love you, I’m just not in love with you. You’re not entitled to a marriage just because we’ve been together for so long!” They’d absolutely flip their shit and with good reason... and those women go on FDS and bemoan men as a whole.

The fact of the matter is it’s easy for women to play high and mighty about sex when guys will pork anything with a pulse... and it’s easy for guys to act all high and mighty about marriage when they have a woman or group of women that would drop everything for the chance.

Edit to add: women who have had YEARS wasted by a guy that was never going to commit are way less likely to lead a guy on with the “assumed” reward of sex. They’ve experienced the female version which is MUCH worse and wastes WAY more time. Go for these women. They respect themselves and therefore you.

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wtknight · 2020-07-16T21:42:27+00:00

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glo0mysky · 2020-07-17T01:31:55+00:00

Person who has sex often: “Nobody is entitled to sex!”

Dongune · 2020-07-17T03:04:54+00:00

People overvalue it.

SherbertBacon · 2020-07-17T06:33:31+00:00

Sex is awesome. It's recreational, and in the right context it's a way to grow deeper with someone. I don't really get what you're asking from that paragraph either. Nobody is entitled to sex—that's a very specific message to people who, for some bizarre reason, think otherwise. If you don't think you're entitled to it, we're not talking about you.

A different set of people get sex and want more—that's fine. Personally I think it should be done ethically (which is where that comment comes from), because there's great personal and external value in being a man of character and integrity. But that's an entirely different subject than incels not getting laid.

Serend1p1ty · 2020-07-17T17:16:32+00:00

Sex is like food and water. If you have a lack of it in your life, then it will occupy your mind.

Once you have abundance, you stop caring about it so much. It's still important, but you can focus on other things. I am confident there is food in my fridge, so its not the top of my worries at the moment.

Title	What is your perspective on the value of sex
Author	Tricksterspider
Upvotes	9
Comments	118
Date	July 16, 2020 6:36 PM UTC (6 years ago)
Subreddit	Posted in /r/PurplePillDebate
Original Link	https://old.reddit.com/r/PurplePillDebate/comments/hsfe1h/what_is_your_perspective_on_the_value_of_sex/
Archive Link	https://theredarchive.com/r/PurplePillDebate/what-is-your-perspective-on-the-value-of-sex.715184 https://theredarchive.com/post/715184

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