Hey, Ladies. I recently had an interesting conversation with a male companion on the subject of engagement etiquette. I'm interested to know what you all think. His perspective was that, if he were to buy a woman a nice ring, he should receive some sort of engagement gift (from the woman) of relatively equal value in return. When I asked what sort of gift he thought would be appropriate, he said "something the man is interested in." For example, an expensive new rifle if he is into hunting. Something along those lines.
For some reason, this rubbed me the wrong way. Maybe I'm overthinking it, but this feels like a round about way of basically getting the woman to pay for her own ring. While I don't think it would be totally inappropriate for the woman to give some sort of gift, I feel like expecting a proposal to result in an equitable exchange of goods is off-putting. I told him as much.
He then asked "Well, if she gets a ring, what do I get?" And, I responded - her hand in marriage, her promise to love and support you through sickness and in health, to carry and help rear your children, to help you manage your household, etc.
I feel that if a man truly loves and is invested in spending the rest of his life with a woman, he should be able to purchase a ring without expecting an expensive toy in return as an expression of her gratitude. It just seems to cheapen the gesture.
I'm interested to hear some other women's thoughts on this. If a man proposed to you, and you accepted, would you feel inclined to respond with an "engagement gift"?
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