My extremely liberal female coworker says you can't be sexist towards men

OttabMike · 2015-07-21T18:49:46+00:00

Sexism or gender discrimination is prejudice or discrimination based on a person's sex or gender.

So if she presumes negative traits in people based on their gender then it is unquestionably Sexism. Any convoluted argument to deny this is a transparent attempt to avoid responsibility.

DavidByron2 · 2015-07-21T19:15:36+00:00

She's a bigot and definitely not liberal.

cranktheguy · 2015-07-21T19:10:43+00:00

She claims that you can only be prejudice towards men, just like you can't be racist towards white people.

If these were her exact words, she is getting her definition wrong. According to modern Sociological theory, you can be prejudiced against anyone but institutional racism is only prejudice plus power (which doesn't really happen to white people in the . They drop the "institutional" part in common discourse. This has lead to people like your coworker using the definition wrong.

RunawayGrain · 2015-07-21T20:15:50+00:00

I think stop talking to her.

pnw_diver · 2015-07-21T19:11:01+00:00

Start complaining to HR. She is creating a hostile, sexist workplace for you and injecting her personal political views into the workplace inappropriately. She should be reprimanded.

Roguta · 2015-07-21T18:50:58+00:00

That very idea is, of course, fundamentallly sexist itself. But more importantly - stupid.

Lethn · 2015-07-21T18:58:36+00:00

Basically what these people are doing is marginlising people who had nothing to do with what their ancestors did and are using it as an excuse to act like total cunts.

People like your coworker are just looking for a reason that lets them be as racist and sexist as they like to a certain group. Anyone else and they'd be outraged at that kind of treatment.

Really is completely backwards and brainwashed thinking.

cymrich · 2015-07-23T02:50:02+00:00

I think people trying to redefine sexism and racism just so that their sexist and/or racist attitude doesn't fit it is bullshit...

freedomfreighter · 2015-07-21T19:55:44+00:00

This is a classic example of how these people will literally lie to you and themselves, bold face (or maybe just legitimate stupidity), and try to sell you a definition that has never existed and has no place in a world of equality.

What she's saying, is that she is a sexist and a racist, she just needs to justify it.

yummyluckycharms · 2015-07-21T18:50:07+00:00

Just tell her that women cant be victims of sexism because they are privileged and the dominant class in the existing matriarchy.

check mate

ezetemp · 2015-07-21T21:46:46+00:00

[permanently deleted]

Wargame4life · 2015-07-21T19:34:45+00:00

i think you must work somewhere with very low entry requirements

blueoak9 · 2015-07-21T19:51:53+00:00

[permanently deleted]

Hungerwolf · 2015-07-21T20:04:34+00:00

You can't win. I have tried the "so, you are saying that I am different due to the color of my skin?" approach. It doesnt work, they dodge it, call you a racist or misogynist, and/or try to silence you.

Edit- if you do call her on it, ask her the following- But what is the argument being made? Does she believe that men are inferior and dont deserve to be considered victims, or does she believe that men are inherently superior and therefore can't be both superior and victimized at the same time?

apullin · 2015-07-21T20:25:53+00:00

There is a Slate Star Codex post about exactly this.

You can't argue with people's definitions.

augustfell · 2015-07-21T20:32:47+00:00

Because:

sexism + power = prejudice + power

oh wait--

Captaincastle · 2015-07-21T20:35:55+00:00

She sounds like she's very confused, and i hope she realizes she's tacitly supporting a hate movement.

GenderNeutralLanguag · 2015-07-21T21:35:09+00:00

"Historically dominant" is BULL SHIT. By "Historically dominant" she means "Within living memory"

In the 1950's there was a massive social change that pulled the rug out from under traditional female gender roles. This trivialization of "Women's Work" with household appliances like vacuum cleaners and Washing Machines is the "Hatred of women" that feminists rally against.

Similarly with race. "White" where the primary slave race from 400BC to 800 AD. That is 1,200 years. The tans-Atlantic slave trade only lasted about 100. "Whites" didn't become the dominant race until 1492 when Spain managed to take the last occupied city from the Moors. "Whites" have been dominant for at best 500 years. This is a pittance compared to the 6,000ish years of civilization and the 200,000 years of humans as a species.

Hypersapien · 2015-07-21T21:53:19+00:00

A demographic doesn't have feelings or rights that can be violated. Only individuals do. Racism and sexism happen between individuals, and their effect is not mitigated by the standing of other members of the victim's sex and race.

garglemesh42 · 2015-07-21T22:58:43+00:00

She's one of those idiots that believes sexism is prejudice + power, which means she's either a moron or incredibly misinformed. Possibly both.

ThePigmanAgain · 2015-07-21T23:57:46+00:00

She's a moron. Ask her if a Klan chapter in Nigeria is not racist because they are in a country where it is blacks who are the dominant people.

bitchessuck · 2015-07-21T18:39:49+00:00

It's bullshit, of course. It is a ridiculous proposition to say that white people used to be a "dominant race" in the past or men used to be the "dominant gender". It makes even less sense to conclude from that people of these groups cannot be discriminated against because of that. But even if we let that slide, you simply have to look at this on an individual level. You cannot make general sweeping statements for a whole group of people that is very diverse.

MRSPArchiver · 2015-07-21T18:32:01+00:00

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jo939 · 2015-07-21T20:07:36+00:00

Your coworker is being an idiot. Tell them that sexism is by definition, prejudice against a sexual orientation.

gprime · 2015-07-21T20:21:33+00:00

She's parroting the language of sociology, which is more of a political ideology than an academic discipline. When encountering such nonsense, my response tends to be something along the lines of, "if you want to split hairs like that fine, we'll call it discrimination...surely you don't mean to suggest that discrimination is acceptable?" Of course you might get some bullshit response about the "right of the oppressed" to gate their oppressor, but you can always invert their rhetorical nonsense to undermine their position.

shinarit · 2015-07-21T20:54:01+00:00

It doesn't matter how you call it. Sexist, prejudiced, whatever: it's being an asshole. It's called arguing over shit, or if done in an argument as a defense it's simple derailing.

ghebert001 · 2015-07-21T21:15:58+00:00

Look through this sub as well as /r/mrref and show her all the ways in which women are in power. If it's based on who has the power then by her logic you can't be sexist towards women.

Tmomp · 2015-07-21T23:04:37+00:00

You might point out that her privilege blinds her to seeing the privilege she has the suffering of people with less privilege than her. And that only when she acknowledges her privilege does she have a chance at transcending it.

Black_caped_man · 2015-07-22T00:15:44+00:00

I suggest you buy her a dictionary and put a bookmark on the page containing the definition of sexism and racism. I also suggest you highlight the important area of text to be certain that she notices it.

chocoboat · 2015-07-22T03:48:58+00:00

I'd ask her if she thinks it's possible for a woman to dislike anyone who happens to be male. Unless she's insane, she'll answer yes.

Then I'd ask her what she calls it. It doesn't matter what she calls it, the point is that you both agree that hate and prejudice towards a group is happening, and that this is just an argument over semantics.

Finally I'd show her multiple dictionary definitions of sexism, showing that the hatred/prejudice of men qualifies.

Once her argument is boiled down to "the dictionary is wrong", you can say "maybe that's your opinion on what it SHOULD mean, but you can't be surprised when most of the world is using the dictionary definition."

Revoran · 2015-07-22T04:21:21+00:00

She's just trying to redefine words to suit her toxic ideology.

Sexism is discriminated based on sex: it doesn't matter whether you're a male or a female doing it to a male or a female.

2015-07-22T05:02:44+00:00

She's a cunt who's too stupid to come up with her own bullshit is what I think.

AloysiusC · 2015-07-22T06:26:16+00:00

There are two huge mistakes in there:

1) She presumes from the outset that every man is in a position of power because he's a man which is demonstrably false.

2) She changed the meaning of the word "sexism" to include power imbalance.

Ironically her statement itself is sexist even by her own standards because she has more power to assert it since people are more inclined to believe women are weaker than men. This is still the case even if her assumption that women are always weaker, is true. Because, if they are always weaker, then they'd also be weaker at getting sexism against them recognized and acknowledged.

2015-07-22T13:23:22+00:00

I love the irony of this statement. That sentence is literally sexist toward men.

Demonspawn · 2015-07-21T20:22:37+00:00

Ahh, the old "Sexism = prejudice + power" definition.

Explain to her that women control 55% of suffrage, therefore women are in power. Ergo, it's men who can't be sexist.

Title	My extremely liberal female coworker says you can't be sexist towards men
Author	TheWierdAsianKid
Upvotes	48
Comments	72
Date	July 21, 2015 6:31 PM UTC (11 years ago)
Subreddit	Posted in /r/MensRights
Original Link	https://old.reddit.com/r/MensRights/comments/3e3nj0/my_extremely_liberal_female_coworker_says_you/
Archive Link	https://theredarchive.com/r/MensRights/my-extremely-liberal-female-coworker-says-you-cant.974929 https://theredarchive.com/post/974929

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