My wife was pretty disgusting in this category. She actually internally believed she wasn’t wrong, or perhaps more appropriately couldn’t handle when she was wrong so then she looked to deflect or twist it to focus on something that I was wrong with, that may or may not be related to the current argument. Do they actually truly believe they are right, even when it’s absurd, or are they so egotistical they refuse to be wrong. My marriage would have survived if my wife actually, and genuinely, knew how to apologize and admit when she was wrong. I’m not talking about the stupid stuff, im talking about apologizing for being nasty comments she would say during a fight. For asking and even demanding for my opinion and then tearing me down when it didn’t align with hers.

If any wives (ex-wives) are reading this, I hope you can be big enough to apologize when you are wrong. Because even if your husband doesn’t say anything to you when you are ruthless, it kills his connection with you. Some guys put up boundaries and walk away (best option) but others, like myself, tried to brush it off as no big deal but, at the end of the day, it is a big deal. I lost trust in my wife, I stopped sharing vulnerable details with her, and I genuinely didn’t want to be around her anymore. And then she doubles down her ruthless ways thinking that if normal ruthless isn’t bad enough, let’s be twice as ruthless to “fix him”. If your mind works like this, then you are not healthy enough to be in a relationship (at least in a healthy one).

I would have given my wife everything. I tried, and then it became expectation. And even when it was expectation I was still simp enough to be ok with that. But when it became ruthless, over stupid trivial things, and you were never wrong, I was done.

I’m sure I’m not alone in my thinking. I became so strong from my failed marriage that I will double down on my success going forward.