Fed up with a man child!

UpbeatIncubator · 2020-04-26T14:12:16+00:00

Passive men are not HVM. If it's a regular occurrence, imagine having that dynamic in a more serious relationship. NOOOO. Past behavior is the best indicator of future behaviour.

Dump.

alexis_le_trotteur · 2020-04-26T17:48:09+00:00

Let's just play the game and say he's scared, ok? Do you really want to start a relationship with a guy who is fucking SCARED to ask you out? What will he be afraid of later? To call you his girlfriend? To live with you? There is a risk here that you'll always need to move the relationship foward because he wont, I wouldn't take that chance.

jayda92 · 2020-04-26T13:49:17+00:00

I personally wouldn't trust a therapist like that anymore... I want a therapist to be brutally honest: this sounds like advice I can get from my PickMe friends. They don't charge... 🧐

pickmieshaexorcist · 2020-04-26T13:36:20+00:00

Definitely dump him! He sounds like the type of guy that you’ll never hear from again once you stop doing all the work. Good riddance, who needs that?

Your therapist bought into the “shy guy” lie! I actually wouldn’t fire her for this, because this lie is so very prevalent in society. I used to believe it too. If she demonstrates more toxic pickme thinking, like urging a woman to stand by her abusive man, then yeah fire her. But I would most certainly tell her my thoughts on it and keep my eyed peeled for more dangerous pickme beliefs.

bengthread · 2020-04-26T17:26:38+00:00

"Scared" doesn't matter. You deserve a man who is sure about you and is clear about his intentions. Good on you for dumping him, and for valuing your time by not letting a guy play games.

dodobo18 · 2020-04-26T13:59:15+00:00

I was in similar shoes a couple of months ago. He was very nice and kind but never initiated contact. Once I stopped texting he never texted. I think that was a waste of my time and I would never do that again. Be strong, you are doing the right thing!

circescircus · 2020-04-26T14:45:35+00:00

There are a lot of shit therapists out there and yours sounds like one of them. Definitely find a new therapist, someone who is not a total quack. There are some really good therapists out there, but a lot more bad ones. Shop around until you find one that you can respect.

Present_Pumpkin · 2020-04-26T15:17:38+00:00

He'd be hard work throughout if you built any relationship with him. I would move on.

quaintlyspoken · 2020-04-26T15:09:45+00:00

Past time to dump him and the therapist. Tell her why too. She should be helping her clients not making life harder for them by manipulating you to accept LVMs.

Kekekeke7777 · 2020-04-26T14:57:21+00:00

I’ve been debating about mine lately too. I really like her and she’s helped me a ton. But I’ve been getting more extreme lately in my beliefs about men after reading Why Does He Do That. WDHDT turned my world upside down in an earth-shattering/empowering way. Yet when I told her about it she was skeptical and doubted its credibility which made go oof. She Also encouraged me to know that “there are good men out there.” Which felt like a more well-meaning “not all men.” So idk what to do either.

FluffandRainclouds · 2020-04-26T16:28:47+00:00

men who don't ask for what they want (e.g. super passive, don't share their opinions, at worst get passive-aggressive expecting you to read their minds) are sooo unattractive. I support both things. Not every therapist is a fit. You can, of course, voice concern to the therapist if you think that relationship is salvageable (clients IMO should be able to give feedback)

mightbethrowawayyy · 2020-04-26T14:10:29+00:00

He sounds very lazy. And if he says yes to everything but never initiates, I’m thinking he has a gf/wife and is cheating on her. When his wife finds out, he’s gonna be like “oh we’re just friends! We’ve never done anything, and look, she’s the one kept asking me out!”

the_cucumber · 2020-04-26T14:43:57+00:00

[deleted]

honeybeeroll · 2020-04-26T21:38:31+00:00

My thoughts are get a new therapist, or just don't talk to this one about dating lol. And good for you girl! Something good friends and this sub taught me is like, listen to your gut. Does it bother you that he does certain things or doesn't do certain things? If yes, don't worry about what you think you "should" do, don't think about "oh maybe he's shy, maybe he's this, maybe he's that." Just get rid of him and move onto the next one. Life is too short to settle! And settling is dangerous too, as we see time and time again :/

Whateverbabe2 · 2020-04-27T00:14:01+00:00

I no longer trust therapists that don't have doctorates. If you wanna mess with my head you better know what you're doing.

ShieldMaidenLagertha · 2020-04-26T15:16:29+00:00

Ugh. I feel like a lot of men have hormone imbalances. That’s not normal for him to be that passive.

Brad_Bury · 2020-04-26T22:48:33+00:00

Dump Him... And of course fire your therapist...

yaaasss123 · 2020-04-27T00:01:15+00:00

Dump him and the therapist, you deserve better.

Title	Fed up with a man child!
Author	S3ra-phina
Upvotes	207
Comments	37
Date	April 26, 2020 1:28 PM UTC (6 years ago)
Subreddit	Posted in /r/FemaleDatingStrategy
Original Link	https://old.reddit.com/r/FemaleDatingStrategy/comments/g8ecoj/fed_up_with_a_man_child/
Archive Link	https://theredarchive.com/r/FemaleDatingStrategy/fed-up-with-a-man-child.722319 https://theredarchive.com/post/722319

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