online dating...

Sage_Planter · 2020-11-22T15:33:05+00:00

I want a man who knows the difference between "being sarcastic" and "being an asshole."

dollymyfolly · 2020-11-22T15:43:11+00:00

“I want a woman who understands sarcasm” = I’m gonna gaslight you

atuan · 2020-11-22T15:22:27+00:00

All the requirements for a partner for men on OLD profiles are projections of their own irritating behavior. They’re not actually looking for someone who understands sarcasm, they’re literally already defending and blaming you for what they know is abrasive behavior. Literally before even meeting anyone.

They don’t think about what they want in a woman. What they want in a woman is someone who mirrors themselves. They want a nobody and their list of qualities is just about accepting their own qualities.

Fresh-Presentation76 · 2020-11-22T16:30:32+00:00

When something "isn't misogynistic but feels misogynistic" it's probably because your subconscious has picked up on a pattern of men who do that thing being misogynist. Please trust your instinct.

BlueberriesandCream5 · 2020-11-22T15:22:09+00:00

I’ve seen this in OLD as well as in person meetups. Heck, I’ve seen this in some male colleagues, classmates, and just men in general.

Being well versed in sarcasm myself, I never actually have to tell people that I am. I just...well..AM lol. Thing is, I only display this trait after careful vetting of the person, because not everyone is into that kind of humor, and that’s OK. A person with a high EI understands that. Most women tend to have a higher EI compared to men. We have a better understanding of the concepts of personal space, boundaries, etc.

Almost everyone that appreciates my humor are women. I receive actual displays of positive responses.

Many men have responded by actually just calling me sarcastic, almost as if it’s their synonym for “b*tch”. It’s seen as intimidating. They don’t “get it”. And when they do, it’s not “funny”.

Honestly, I’m not even 30 yet, and I’ve come to the conclusion that a lot of guys are just...well...insecure. They want a woman who will laugh at EVERY joke they have because they’ve been told all their lives that women like to laugh or whatever. Or that make a woman laugh is a way for her to fall for you.

Pathetic, ewww

UshiiMoe · 2020-11-22T16:25:00+00:00

Yes an immediate red flag for me. Basically comes off as an excuse to be disrespectful

No_Energy7768 · 2020-11-22T15:41:33+00:00

Is online dating even worth it ? I am 18 and honestly could not date online. I feel like at this point, it will be a disaster. Plus the emotional drain from texting multiple guys kinda discourages me.

I never online dated or opened a dating account but I feel like it isn't worth it.

Delilahh12345 · 2020-11-22T21:46:44+00:00

I also hate guys who say they are looking for a woman who is "open-minded". That just means they want a woman who will let them perform degrading sex acts on them.

Solivagant-C · 2020-11-22T14:53:10+00:00

They are basically searching for a woman who’d laugh at their misogyny

yesmme · 2020-11-22T21:07:04+00:00

“Oh I understand sarcasm. I just don’t think you’re funny.” I’ve said this a few times to men

saraswati_beans · 2020-11-23T02:12:18+00:00

Related red flags on OLD profiles:

1) They write that they’re looking for “someone who can laugh at herself.” They will be negging you and then gaslighting you by trying to pass it off as it as humor/“sarcasm”

2) They answer the “we’ll get along if” prompt with “you don’t take yourself too seriously.” This is just a thinly veiled warning against having any standards or boundaries

3) They answer the “you should NOT go out with me if” prompt with “you are easily offended” or “you can’t take a joke.” Basically, this just means he is going to be a dick

Along with the references to being sarcastic/ wanting someone who “understands sarcasm” I see these 3 answers (or variations of them) CONSTANTLY on Hinge. Or saw them— I finally deactivated my OLD profiles today after months of fruitless dumpster diving.

Surprise-Turbulent · 2020-11-22T15:28:22+00:00

Oml I want to be her friend

Adawritesrules · 2020-11-22T16:58:45+00:00

They should all just write “I want a partner who is ok with my limp dick, and is happy with wiping my shit stained ass because I’m mentally ill while I jerk off to fantasies of children, incest, photoshopped body parts of women, and gay porn - but I am straight”

That about sums up men in the dating pool right now...

Novemberinthechair · 2020-11-22T22:33:30+00:00

Code for eat shit or I'll gaslight you.

Flightlessbirbz · 2020-11-23T00:59:34+00:00

Translation: “I want plausible deniability if I say something that offends you.”

2020-11-22T18:36:46+00:00

ah yes...what makes or breaks a marriage...understanding sarcasm.

OpenCelebration3 · 2020-11-23T06:18:34+00:00

Yeah, I understand sarcasm Brian. But, You’re just a fucking asshole.

2020-11-22T16:21:46+00:00

She’s gorgeous ☺️

Title	online dating...
Author	onthedown88
Upvotes	669
Comments	43
Date	November 22, 2020 2:33 PM UTC (5 years ago)
Subreddit	Posted in /r/FemaleDatingStrategy
Original Link	https://old.reddit.com/r/FemaleDatingStrategy/comments/jywjw5/online_dating/
Archive Link	https://theredarchive.com/r/FemaleDatingStrategy/online-dating.726919 https://theredarchive.com/post/726919

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