Married Dude Here

westnblue · 2019-09-27T02:08:35+00:00

What percentage of the time is good and bad?

seabeeaj · 2019-09-27T05:11:34+00:00

For you guys who want to know why, there are no words to describe the horror, YES... horror of being married. I'm a retired veteran and would rather do a tour in Vietnam again than to get married. At least in war you know you may die, but that tour comes to an end. You survived. In marriage you sleep with the enemy and fight to survive till you die.

Edit: in Vietnam I at least knew where I stood, in a marriage you don't...

softbeats · 2019-09-27T02:02:15+00:00

Done and done.

Original_Username7 · 2019-09-27T05:35:16+00:00

Divorced dude here. I agree. She was a perfect, sexy angel when we were dating, and became a withholding nagging demon after kids and marriage. I am way happier being on my own again, especially after the hell she put me (and the kid) through with the divorce and multiple custody battles. I was societally brainwashed and learned the hard way, you shouldn't be.

dogsrule2019 · 2019-09-27T03:08:33+00:00

[deleted]

striving2bgr8 · 2019-09-27T02:12:15+00:00

C'mon man...

Go ahead and tell us how you really feel

MrMagtow · 2019-09-27T03:30:13+00:00

Agreed. Marriage is a contract between you, your wife, and the government. Even if you break the agreement between you and your wife, the agreement between you and the government is never broken.

What this means is the government can force you to pay money to it, which it then transfers to your ex-wife (alimony). Even these days, we're seeing men who were divorced more than 5 years ago being taken back to court for increased alimony.

Manidos · 2019-09-27T04:03:55+00:00

Before two of my buddies got married they used to complain about their jobs, tough working environment, asshole bosses and such, now all I hear from them "Can you imagine? My fucking wife did this/that ..." And the sad/funny part is that they are only a couple of years into marriage.

JMD173 · 2019-09-27T03:01:00+00:00

Thank you for your honesty, most married men play the "misery loves company" role.

murph55 · 2019-09-27T02:19:06+00:00

Is this truly advice on your part, or are you venting in the moment?

Patricijaobjectdude · 2019-09-27T08:01:13+00:00

Marriage is like coming to a 6-8 job you hate after a 9-5 job you hate.

LarryGHOW · 2019-09-27T02:59:42+00:00

Marriage isn't the final nail to the coffin, being married then proceed to have kids and hoping they're grow up right but not, that's the kicker. When the divorce comes and the spouse or ex isn't a capable person but the court decides they are the rightful guardian then you're fucked. Worse case is you got a kid with downs and some syndrome, you're basically a full fucked and cucked.

JDTokyo · 2019-09-27T08:56:01+00:00

25 years here. My biggest regret in life is getting married. And frankly, mine is better than most.

2019-09-27T02:45:31+00:00

[deleted]

TheRabbitTunnel · 2019-09-27T03:42:50+00:00

Does this sound like it describes your marriage well?

https://old.reddit.com/r/MGTOW/comments/9vohjq/happiness_is_an_impossibility_in_modern/

elcheapo17 · 2019-09-27T02:00:26+00:00

Here here!

Kotaro-Atani · 2019-09-27T18:15:36+00:00

18 1/2 years in the Marriage, I was in a relationship with her 4 years before the Marriage, so total of 22 years in a Relationshit/Marriage. Married before my son arrived. 6-7 years were good (4 years before marriage and 2-3 years after Marriage). After that Average to Meh until about year 10, then next 4 years Meh to very Bad (went from being a loving couple in the beginning to sleeping in other rooms and being more like roommates, sex was almost non-existent because I caught her cheating ) then the last 4 years was stupidly Bad (Dead Bedroom= was told to go find it somewhere else, so I got "Fixed" and I did, we still slept in different rooms, "I'm not Happy!!" whining from her all the time, she wouldn't work in or out of the household, I did almost everything including cooking, Laundry and house cleaning those years, she watched TV all day, she was always trying to start fights and was extremely lazy and she got really fat, she went from 130 lbs to like 240+ lbs).

Why did I not get out Sooner?? after the last 4 yrs, my son turned 18. 4 months later I Dropped the Bomb and got Divorced.

No Child Support to pay, my son was already 18.

No Alimony. (the state of Georgia is Awesome.)

But, I still Lost Half my Shit-

House ($240k) that was totally Paid off, so she got $120k after it was sold (I got $120k too and put it on a new house after the Divorce), she got $10k in savings, and I got $10k, and she got one Small SUV worth KBB 13k and I had to pay it off and give it to her, as per the fucking Judge, plus whatever furniture she basically wanted, she didn't take too much of it though, she just wanted the money= AWALT.

At this point you guys are saying but what about your Pension and 401K, well I got laid off at my job 5 years before my son turned 18 and I Liquidated my Pension and 401K, basically I cashed it out and took the Penalty. I paid off my School loan, paid off my house, paid all my debts off and cut all my credit cards except for one and bought myself a newer used car for $17k.

I Gambled about $17k-20k of it away hoping for a large Win, DAMN!!! I hate Loosing money. ;)

And after all that, I put the rest in savings that I had left, $20k.

On the Next job/position I got, I never opened a 401K, or put any money into the company one (I did this on purpose) and I was under the necessary amount of years to get a pension when I got divorced, plus I got a lower paying job than my past job and did not put anything into savings since I already had $20k (I got a lower paying job in case I got Divorced before my Son turned 18 and I had to pay Child support payments, so it would make the payments lower, then I was going to get a new job making more and not tell her or my son until the payments ended).

So give or take it cost me about $145k-150k.

Also let me tell you that I knew she had a safe deposit Box that her parents had for her that held like $40k from an Inheritance she had gotten from her grandmother that she never co-mingled with my finances just in case we ever got Divorced (got to love those In-laws/grand parents).

Now let me state, she never, ever, and I mean ever=

Made a Mortgage payment to the House.
Nor did she ever put money into the savings account.
She never paid for the deposit of the Small SUV. (she emptied our savings account to the tune of $4999, and left a dollar to buy it, you gotta love that).
Nor did she ever make any payments on the Small SUV (it was like $400 a month), or pay car Insurance on it.
While together, I paid all the bills, absolutely everything, all utilities, food., you name it I paid for it. she never had to worry if stuff was gonna get paid, because it always was.
paid all her credit cards until I wouldn't pay them anymore after year 10. She then started taking money out of the joint bank account to shop and pay her cc bills, making the Monthly utility bills bounce and multiple $40 charges hit the account. The joint bank account was closed after that and I opened separate bank accounts in my name only and never co-mingled money again.

7a. In year 11 is where things started getting pretty bad, I happened upon her laptop at the end of the year, which she left open with her Yahoo messenger and her email was open as well and found out she was cheating on me with a ex-boyfriend of hers, goddamn FACEBOOK, for like 6 mos, found out she was planning to leave me for him. I copied all her emails and sent them to a new email I had for future Divorce evidence. I found out the man she was having an affair with was a officer in the Air Force. I got all the information together (his emails even stated, he knew she was married and he could be dishonorably discharged if his commanding officers found out about the relationship), found out who his CO was and mailed the Information to him with my contact #'s in case he needed verification, the CO of the cheating officer advised me he spoke to the cheating officer and he was to be Dishonorably discharged if he continued to contact my wife. He broke up with her that day. I come home from work and she is crying and when I push her on it, she said one of her relatives died but was vague on which one. it went down from there.

7b. I'm not gonna go into the last couple years (4) but I knew I was gonna divorce her, so I took various steps, she was a pure leech and just horrible to live with, it was like living with a Roommate that just treated you like garbage and you just had to keep paying. If it wasn't a spouse / mother of your child, you would just kick them out and tell them good "F"in bye.

after my Son turned 18, I waited 4 more months (I almost couldn't bear it) then I dropped the "I'm not Happy....Whaaaa" myself and got divorced.
Freedom.....MGTOW, and I will never get Married ever again.

Oh I forgot to add this, I went back to the casino and Gambled again and won like $19k after the Divorce ;) for some reason I never had to pay taxes on it....

PS- the last time I talked to a woman about getting married, she asked me, what would it take for me to become married again, I told her that I would need a dowry of $300k that I would put into a Caymen Island bank account, that she would never see, touch or have access to. She asked me why? I told her it was in the event of ever getting Divorced, so I could recoup my losses because I am the Prize not her, since she has nothing to bring to the table, she said "I got my BOX", and I said yup and I got My "D" in a BOX (SNL Joke) and then I said that equals us out in the Sexual dept. "You got anything else to Bring to the Table ? because I got no debt, I have a nice house and lots of Money"..she couldn't answer me. I thought so.... MIC Drop....

2019-09-27T02:05:41+00:00

That's the spirit

mgtow01 · 2019-09-27T02:00:11+00:00

I know. Failed early marriage myself. Didn't lose anything because we were so young. No kids or property.

But I see what guys have gone through. Shit.

Nope. Never considered it again.

BigBadBoomchakka · 2019-09-27T16:41:19+00:00

Married 27 years here.. have struggled with depression in recent years.. I was amazed to realise that it’s because of dramas with her... work is stressful but never gets me down... and when she was away for a week I loved being able to do My own thing without comments from her. Just an hour down at the shops alone and I feel happy and free.. never get married guys

1556475276 · 2019-09-27T13:43:49+00:00

marriage is such a stupid contract. sometimes it seems guys believe they get some right of control over the wife with marriage. which doesnt hold up to reality, because she's going to do what she wants either way and when married, now can fuck you over royally.

WalmartNiggaPussy · 2019-09-27T03:13:28+00:00

Bro, I didn't quite get that, you didn't use the word 'never' enough. /s

anubhav23 · 2019-09-27T04:13:28+00:00

Thank u man. But let it all out you know. It's bad for ur health to keep that pain and suffering to yourself.

Joemacklin643 · 2019-09-27T05:47:45+00:00

Just saved this post to remind me

theradon100 · 2019-09-27T05:55:09+00:00

Never gonna happen

blackukmgtow · 2019-09-27T12:23:47+00:00

Sounds like somebody just needs to lift and hold frame. /s

idindudat · 2019-09-27T12:36:07+00:00

It's a trap

2019-09-27T18:10:13+00:00

That is BY FAR the best advice I ever got. Learned this at a young age and never married. Half of marriages end in divorce, and out of those who stay married, only half of them are happy. I'm not gonna go through all that effort and expense when there's a 75% chance I'll be worse off than before.

spaceman_spliff777 · 2019-09-27T19:04:25+00:00

Going to attempt to answer some of the questions here. Been married for over a decade.

Good to bad moment ratio declines, as age, bills, responsibilities and lack of/forgetting hobbies piles up.

Both parties start taking each other for granted somewhere around year 5, with one or both completely giving up things like staying in shape.

Kids make anything negative in the relationship amplify. If she’s nagging/carrying a cross on her back before kids, she will be full blown woe is me/what have you done for me lately, once kids hit.

The worst thing you can do after being married is get back in shape and or start really caring about hobbies again. She will go from nagging to full blown paranoid you’re fucking someone else.

Almost forgot the most important part—your friends. Unless she loves your buddies wives, fucking forget about pleasant experiences as a group. If you’re lucky—like I am—she’ll be cool with you hanging with them alone. If she blows ass—like many of my depressed friends—you’re fucking banned from doing things without her.

I tell people all the time, I lucked out as far as wives go. Mine is only a 3 or 4 out of 10 on the psycho scale, but two of my friends married absolute fucking nightmares.

TLDR: marriage isn’t for everyone, and the cons for many completely outweigh the pros. 50% divorce rate proves this. Be careful out there, brothers.

thekidsnotmine · 2019-09-27T02:26:42+00:00

Um so I see you finally met your real wife!

betterforitall · 2019-09-27T03:12:31+00:00

This brings back old and fondled mammaries.

Fierisss · 2019-09-27T05:08:11+00:00

Unless your woman makes x4 than you xD

krisdang111 · 2019-09-27T06:04:30+00:00

Loud and clear, brother!

uniqueusername4221 · 2019-09-27T06:36:47+00:00

We need to save our captured brothers

Shrewski · 2019-09-27T06:48:24+00:00

Appreciate this man. Thanks for the advice. Will never put myself in that position

Uruke · 2019-09-27T07:00:45+00:00

Still gets married

Proceeds to tell others never to get married

VlogIt · 2019-09-27T08:17:20+00:00

Warning us from the depths of hell, eh?

WideMiss · 2019-09-27T11:51:18+00:00

My GF of one year brings it up at the very least once a week how she wants to get married some day etc...I literally laugh in her face every time and it never gets old

BigBadBoomchakka · 2019-09-27T16:41:50+00:00

Motown has helped me realise that her behaviour is normal

thekidsnotmine · 2019-09-27T02:25:49+00:00

Can I get a gell yeah!

Dumaul · 2019-09-27T09:35:26+00:00

Thanks for the reminder, I was in need of it.

2019-09-27T09:56:01+00:00

Thanks for the warning!

Immortalganryu · 2019-09-27T09:57:18+00:00

I wont.

ProtoBraid · 2019-09-27T10:32:39+00:00

Just Divorce 4head.

nativenudistfla · 2019-09-27T11:34:07+00:00

That’s the same advice I gave my son. Almost word for word

joltek · 2019-09-27T11:52:55+00:00

OP should have added a PSA tag to the title.LOL

2019-09-27T12:16:23+00:00

👌

FindingKeeping · 2019-09-27T15:20:03+00:00

I had quit this January. Never felt better

bgentled · 2019-09-27T17:24:09+00:00

Yes! 420 upvotes :D

And regarding the topic... yeah... I'll see one of my bros getting married tomorrow. Wasn't able to change his mind.

All the best to you mate!

JohnPettimore · 2019-09-28T21:51:06+00:00

Exactly. Like it or not, relationships are based on leverage. Once you're married, you lose all of your leverage, and as a result, you end up being this combination of pack mule, ATM and neutered houseboy.

2019-09-30T21:13:20+00:00

I disagree. Respectfully, though.

1) You have to dominate all the time. Roughly and like an animal. If you don't - game over, you are not her man anymore.

2) Set your rules. Woman does not set rules, she fills what you give to her.

3) Keep investing in yourself. Be strong, be independent, be smart, have a hobby, enjoy yourself. Your woman will sincerely love you because of this

4) At any moment, have a plan B whom to fuck. Make her aware about your options. Yeah, she is with you, you enjoy her, she enjoys your commitment, all is great. Next moment she does not want you - all is event better to you!

Finally, have a high testosterone and fuck her as much as possible. If you can't have it naturally - well, you know, buy it and enjoy being a superalpha male.

P.S. I may change your mind and agree that you was right ;)

Rdrums31 · 2019-09-27T03:23:56+00:00

[removed]

Married Dude Here

Comments

I can speak to this -- your latter point -- more than a bit.

Remove sex from the equation and you have absolutely NO PURPOSE for existing.

Did you know that women are the ones to file for divorce in 80% of all cases, and that women who are unmarried are statistically more likely to get crushed by debt, go Bankrupt, and live under the poverty line?

HAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAH an internet relationship.

Title	Married Dude Here
Author	methvinm
Upvotes	508
Comments	187
Date	September 27, 2019 1:57 AM UTC (6 years ago)
Subreddit	Posted in /r/MGTOW
Original Link	https://old.reddit.com/r/MGTOW/comments/d9toqc/married_dude_here/
Archive Link	https://theredarchive.com/r/MGTOW/married-dude-here.652622 https://theredarchive.com/post/652622