Do shit tests actually happen irl?

blackedoutfast · 2018-09-29T21:42:31+00:00

literally all the time. people who think shit tests don't exist just don't understand what the term means.

even if you've never been in an actual romantic relationship, you probably get shit tested by other girls/women you interact with. or when a group of male friends are teasing each other and busting each other's balls, it's basically the same thing.

petrichordium · 2018-09-29T23:05:19+00:00

I think of it more like “anger tests”. Girls test what a guy’s visceral response to an ego cut is. And they have good reason! Many guys either crumble into sad puddles (not sexy) or ELSE they flare up (gonna end at the battered women’s shelter).

calling that behavior a shit test just shows too many cards about where you learned that concept and what constellation of ideas it comes along with. So take the lesson not the terminology

ThisIsJustATr1bute · 2018-09-29T21:42:14+00:00

Well it appears some of those things listed are just her saying she’s not interested.

“I have a boyfriend”.

“Can we be just friends”.

So those do happen IRL, but they aren’t tests for men to pass and push through; they are rejections. The fact that some guys won’t take that at face value is distressing.

The things like “I bet you say that to all the girls,” I think people say, but it’s kind of cliche and an older phrase, so I think it’s almost always done playfully/tongue in cheek, and is not actually said expecting a serious response or justification. It’s just a way of telling the guy she thinks he’s cute.

Edit: looking more into it, it is mostly banter and teasing. It’s normal. What I think is that TRP guys assume it’s a hostile thing from women. It’s the same how negging is this word for teasing except it’s more mean-spirited. Playful banter is awesome, it’s presumed not to be hostile, though.

MoodyBrizo · 2018-09-29T22:37:39+00:00

There are only a few TRP concepts I'd bet money on, but I'd bet my house on this one.

rainbowdeath666 · 2018-09-30T09:18:37+00:00

Hee hee so the guy who wrote that up doesn't understand the difference between sarcasm, being told a women is not interested in him, flirting or being teased..... Its kinda scary he thinks rejection, is a green light to get with her though. Its super strange he thinks all those different form of communication are the same thing, its also strange he doesn't think men do any of them, I'm prety sure he even recommended they do them in response to them.....

PrideInIndividuality · 2018-09-30T11:08:45+00:00

I am a Lyft driver and one girl today shit tested me,

"Hey, I'm going to take a nap for a while. You're not gonna kidnap me, right?"

My response: "Sure, I will! But look, I'll feed you regularly and will let you watch Netflix."

She giggles, "Aren't you sweet!!"

Me: "If you behave well, I'll also feed you some Oreo cookies and milk. Do you like white milk or chocolate milk?"

Her: "I'm gonna go with chocolate milk..."

Pope_Lucious · 2018-09-29T23:21:21+00:00

Yes. The people who argue otherwise are naive or dishonest.

“Does this dress make my ass look fat?”

girl reaches across the table and scoops a bite of your food.

flamingoinghome · 2018-09-30T11:13:37+00:00

Oh come ON--THESE are the supposed "shit tests"? Half of these 9"I have a boyfriend") are soft rejections, the other half is just flirty banter. "I bet you say that to all the girls" is FLIRTING--she's saying you strike her as a charming guy who flirts with women a lot!

(Even the infamous "do I look fat in this" is just asking for some reassurance--seriously)

And you're just shooting yourself in the dick if that's how you interpret "do you have a girlfriend?" She wants to date you! If she thinks you are not single, and is someone who'd be even REMOTELY pleasant to date, she will not want a taken man! If you're worried about looking inexperienced, you can refer to "playing the field" or something, but seriously.

It's like these guys took normal flirting, interpreted it specifically to select for the most sleazy, drama-filled women and rule out the normal chill ones, and then wonder why 'chicks are so into drama'!

Atlas_B_Shruggin · 2018-09-29T21:38:42+00:00

Absolutely

yasee · 2018-09-29T23:36:17+00:00

yes. this one time I agreed to something ridiculous proposed by my partner because I knew he knew it was ridiculous and I wanted to see if he would double down

or he'll say that something is okay when it's obviously not, wanting to see if I will ignore his feelings and do the thing anyway. that might be more like a comfort test. I'm sure I've done that too

I don't really recommend either of these things but they're kind of just something humans do in response to feeling insecure or annoyed; not a big deal if it's once in a while, probably really damaging if it's all the time. Try to minimize them from your end and if you notice them from your partner, wait for a calmer moment and discuss it.

darksoldierk · 2018-09-30T17:06:01+00:00

Yeah, they happen very regularly. But you don't need us to tell you that, you'll see.

Since the bias nature of the respondent is important here, I"ll try to give you some information about myself. I grew up in a decent home, we had our issues, but my parents didn't get divorced until I was an adult. Most of my childhood was in a western society that had an educational system that was very feminized. The boys had an annual presentation forced down their throats saying things like "Good men don't judge women on their weight, they judge women based on what's on the inside" (read the wording there very carefully and think about that sentence like a child would) and a myriad of other bs that basically ingrained into our heads that women are better than men. I never thought women were better than men, never believed it, but had wholeheartedly believed that women are not any different then men. That, like men, they want to be successful, they want to be helpful, that they want to love and to be loved, to be be valued. That they want to stand on their own two feet. But then I started experiences adult things, that is to say, I started having relationships, started a career etc etc, and you know what I realized? Women are not like men. They say they are, and to them, they are, but what they don't realize is that women's definition of "success","love", "helpful" and "value" are different than men's. I started seeing how wrong everything I was told in school is, women aren't these wonderful creatures who are infinitely and inherently better than men, as the women in those seminars in school claimed, women's thinking and beliefs are so vastly different than men's that it seemed like men and women weren't playing the same game. And they aren't, women get life with a cherry on top, and men get life raw.

So my view was changing slowly as women became a part of my life outside of the classmate/sister/mother environment, I didn't know where my views would end up, I kinda just went with it. But, during that time, I started browsing this website called reddit. And at those days you couldn't go a day without seeing a post talking about how repugnant a subreddit called "/r/theredpill" is. I heard so much disgust about this subreddit, that it peaked my curiosity. So I navigated my way there to see just what all the fuss is about, expecting to see comments and posts that were completely ridiculous, completely out of line and out of touch with society. But as I read through TRP for the first time, I realized that what TRP was saying about the behavior of women was actually what I had been experiencing in the real world. However, I felt like some of their solutions to these issues were a bit immoral, but then I started asking myself "why?", "why are they immoral?", and I realized that every reason that I had was not my own, it was me parroting the women in those seminars from school. It was immoral solely because women said so, now that isn't the definition of morality to me and it never has been. I found that when I implemented some (not all) of the things TRP said, I was happier, my relationships were stronger, my life was better.

So coming from a person who's belief in TRP is limited to the things that he has regularly experienced in real life, will you experience shit tests? Yes, you will. You may realize it at the time, you may not, but at some point in your life you will realize it. Look, dude, shit tests aren't new, women have done this since the start of time. The easiest example is the "hey, does this dress make me look fat?". I remember a friends episode about that, way before TRP even existed. TRP just put a label to it.

abaxeron · 2018-09-29T22:19:13+00:00

I'm wondering whether those happen irl

Yes

and if they do, how often

VERY often

and will I encounter them in a future relationship?

Most probably.

I'd like to elaborate on one thing - shit tests as TRP describes them is GODDAMN VANILLA. There are WAY more severe cases; such as a woman provoking a fight with a random man and seeing if you're going to fight him to entertain her, or getting a side dude and setting up the scenario in which you will catch them red-handed in bed. Faking pregnancy. Faking pregnancy and then faking miscarriage. A lot of stuff.

Sincerity with a woman is something you can hope for, but cannot realistically count on, and should establish right from the start. If she doesn't agree, don't hesitate to proudly miss this opportunity. Keep in mind that it is always objectively better to be single than to be with a woman who is obsessed with constantly shit-testing you. No sex in the world is worth it.

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LeJacquelope · 2018-09-30T03:45:05+00:00

When a woman throws out a shit test, answer it as best you can and then ditch her.

beachredwhine · 2018-09-30T07:24:42+00:00

Rather than simple terms like shit or fitness test think of it like a normie. It's testing boundaries. What can I get away with? Assertive men will demonstrate that they have good boundaries. Men also test women's boundaries in this same way. What can I get away with?

It's all very normal. It only gets 'weird' at the beginning of forming a relationship because of women's dual nature. They want a sexy guy who has options, and want to win him over so that he will give up his other options. He has to have options for that to happen, though. So a lot of terpy stuff is guys saying "like I acted like I actually had options and wasn't going to put up with this shit and she liked liked me!!".

jkonrad · 2018-09-30T10:00:51+00:00

In the early stages. They should all but fade as time goes by, and I’m talking LTR not fling. If everywhere they look they see someone with their shit together, they won’t need to test you, barring the occasional little freak-out.

LewisCross · 2018-09-30T15:40:35+00:00

Um. YEAH

nomansweb · 2018-09-30T22:24:00+00:00

Yes, they happen, especially with cold approaches and then they're not really designed to be beatable by anyone except maybe the top 5% smoothest men (so no shame in failing those). Apart from cold approaches there may be testing of your wittiness, but not all girls do this and some who do are very lenient. Finally you might have girls who are actually dating someone else or have a boyfriend who will tell you that but still flirt with you and can be persuaded but the question is if you should really want to do that in the first place.

In general I think what PUA/TRP calls shit testing is most of the time actually just a way to tell you to piss off.

NeedingAdvice86 · 2018-10-01T16:18:51+00:00

The problem with TRP is the same with tons of the advice in that it broadens testing to load of shit which isn't a test at all.

Some of their tests are outright "Go away or I am calling the police" rejections while a vast majority is just normal everyday behavior by a girl that hasn't even considered the dude for sex but the TRPer gets the idea it was some sort of shit test....that is the "this bitch at the Tesco shittested me by not putting my Rogaine in the wrong bag...did I pass" or "this girl shittested me in the elevator by turning her back and reading her phone" shit that you can see is just the reaction of a damaged ego that sees testing everywhere they go.

You will get some test from girls that you date....such as virtually every girl I have dated has at some point mentioned that someone at work, school, bakery has been flirting with them or is trying to hook up with them....I suppose it is to show that they are wanted by other dudes AND to see how I react...does it make me jealous, get angry, or even care, etc. It is just so common that I suppose that it is natural habit for girls once they start dating.

"I have a boyfriend" has never been a test to me....I suppose others are more attractive or something but none of the girls who have actually said this to me ever worked out in my favor...in my experience for whatever reason, it has been a way to say back off not interested....whether they actually have one, are not attractive to me, or just not feeling like being romanced or dating at the moment.

wtknight · 2018-09-29T22:08:29+00:00

Yes, they happen, but I don't think that all women do them, and I don't think that some women do them for certain men who they already deem as high enough value.

BiggerDthanYou · 2018-09-30T16:55:01+00:00

There's two kinds of shit tests.

deliberate shit tests

Banter, pulling someone's leg and such social tricks are used to quickly determine what kind of a person someone is. This comes natural to socially active people, but they are still well aware of what they are intending to do.

You throw them off the track to see how they react. You talk bullshit to see what kind of opinions they hold. You say something unexpected to get them to laugh. You say something with sexual innuendo to see if they pick up on it.

But most importantly you are throwing out an opportunity for them to counter with something witty/funny. It's just a good way to have a fun time.

unplanned shit tests

For example "do you have a girlfriend" is something that a woman genuinely might want to know, but according to your link it translates to "Are you a beta? (Can you get laid?)".

Unplanned shit tests happen when women say something completely normal, but a socially awkward guy gets thrown off the track and doesn't know what mind-games she intents to play. This makes him pause, stutter and say something awkward and she loses interest. His reaction retroactively turned it into a shit test.

These kinds of shit tests do not exist for regular people because they pass them naturally, so your question can best be answered like:

Do shit tests exist? - Only subjectivity if you are socially awkward. Otherwise they are just part of the normal way normal people socialize and they do not become apparent to them.

LivelyChartreuse · 2018-09-29T21:42:33+00:00

Its just a coping mechanism used by TRPers.

Women don't do this to men who they are actually attracted to.

Title	Do shit tests actually happen irl?
Author	E13V
Upvotes	8
Comments	119
Date	September 29, 2018 9:36 PM UTC (7 years ago)
Subreddit	Posted in /r/PurplePillDebate
Original Link	https://old.reddit.com/r/PurplePillDebate/comments/9k0ryb/do_shit_tests_actually_happen_irl/
Archive Link	https://theredarchive.com/r/PurplePillDebate/do-shit-tests-actually-happen-irl.260642 https://theredarchive.com/post/260642

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