This is one of the rare instances where I'm going to make a thread challenging an idea commonly discussed in the manosphere that I disagree with.

If you've watched red pill influencers on social media/YT, you've probably noticed that they perpetuate the idea that high value men should strive for a scenario in which they have a main girl that they take care of and share a life with, while also being able to have sex with other women (with the main girl having an understanding of the arrangement, not talking about cheating here) The basis for this idea goes something like this:

  1. Men are much more capable of having sex and viewing it as nothing more than a physical pleasure. A man can have sex with another woman and still love his wife/girlfriend (which is accurate)
  2. Women tend to tie emotional connection to sex and, in contrast to men, a woman cannot have sex with another man unless she has completely lost respect and attraction for her man (also accurate)
  3. Some women are willing to share a top tier man over settling for an undesirable man (also accurate)
  4. High value men are a more limited commodity than attractive women (also true), so high value men should not settle for just being able to have sex with one woman. So in essence, they are advocating for a one-sided open relationship.

The issue with this in my opinion is two-fold:

  1. To actually be able to command such a scenario from a worthwhile woman, you have to be obscenely successful. If you think you can get a nice woman to start a family with to agree to that earning 100k and hitting the gym a few times a week, you are sadly mistaken. You need elite status and wealth. This is attainable for less than 1% of men if I'm being conservative about it, in reality probably a much smaller percentile than that. Emphasis on the phrase worthwhile woman. A woman you could see yourself starting a family with, because quite frankly a lot of worthwhile women simply wont agree to an arrangement like that. They'll feel hurt at the idea of their man sleeping with other women, and there will generally be an element of feeling a lack of self respect for agreeing to that sort of thing. If you're LeBron James then there's only one LeBron James (athletes and celebrities use private escort services with NDAs for this sort of thing. They all have extramarital sex, the public just doesn't know about them) You can set the rules of the arrangement to whatever you want. If you're an artist on par with Justin Bieber or Harry Styles, you can do whatever you want. That is not the case for most men. It's an unrealistic pipe dream.

  2. It's an empty hedonistic pursuit. If you've had casual sex with women, you've probably realized that it is nowhere on the same level as being intimate with someone you love and have a genuine emotional connection with. Redpill always talks about "purpose" and ambition. Being married with a career, kids, and other important life obligations but still wanting to go around and fuck a bunch of other girls is like a frat boy mentality. If you have alone time to spend on other women as a married man, you're probably neglecting other aspects of your who life. If you really want to include other people in your sex life, then you can talk about it with your wife and see if she's down to bring other women into the bedroom with you together.

So in essence, it's a childish concept that is unattainable for well over 99% of men, and RP influencers should really stop talking about it (Along with financial abortion, which is an idiotic idea with no rational thought behind it. Thread on that maybe later in the future) I'm gonna end by posting a quote from Shaq, who was a self admitted serial cheater (this post isn't about cheating, but the extramarital sex with random women makes it relevant) who got divorced:

"I was a serial cheater," O'Neal said. "It would be crazy and blasphemous for me to get up here saying boom, boom, bam. I can't do that. I know these guys personally. I know they're going through a lot because I went through a lot ... I did it. I was the best at it. I'm not proud of it. I lost my family doing it. I lost valuable, important years with my children doing it."

.

"The happiest days of my life were coming home and hearing six different people saying, 'Daddy, daddy, daddy,'" O'Neal said. "Happiest days of my life. Forget the money, forget the cars, even the championships. Especially when they were little and 2 [years old] and 3 and didn't really care that I missed 10, 15 free throws. They're waiting for me after games. 'Daddy, can we go to Universal?' Those were the best days of my life.