Deny sex for a year? what dread level? *Starfish

SteelSharpensSteel · 2020-01-26T13:31:30+00:00

Fresh meat, fellas.

HornsOfApathy · 2020-01-26T14:47:27+00:00

TLDR; LARPing Alpha faggot gets laid alot, then gets married. Used to be "alpha" man gets fat, isn't attractive, drinks too much, becomes married plowhorse to a lazy wife, his ego says he deserves sex, sex dries up, he gets more faggoty angry, wife tests, faggot fails, wife gets more demanding, sex dries up more, faggot begins to lift to become alpha again, doesn't sidebar, posts in deadbedrooms, is still a faggot. Finds MRP. Has a chance to not be a faggot anymore.

OP - you are a good example of 90% of men that come into this place. Your story is not special at all and you're not special snowflake. You're a little ahead of the game in that you lift - but that's it. Your head and mental models are entirely fucked.

Now, onto the practical advice:

we have sex maybe once a month, and when we do.. its a "quickie"

Your wife is not attracted to you.

necessary wife duties

Your wife is not attracted to you and fucking you with vigor that she once did.

We have a lot of debt, but because we eat out a lot.

You lack self control and are a shitty captain who can't manage his finances.

high SMV when you are 22 years old

No one, espeically your wife, gives a fuck of what you "used to be". She only cares about what you can provide now - and you're a Beta-Bucks.

I was prom king, and homecoming king.

I know your type of faggot - Your ego is huge. Your younger years alpha-ness sits as a constant reminder to you that you deserve great, enthusiastic sex. You're not getting it so you are deeply rooted in anger at your wife. You should be angry at yourself.

I was physically fit when we met, 5"11, 170lb.

I used to be attractive and got all the gurlzzzz.

fucked 3 girls in a day a few times, and have numbers over maybe 400.

Cool story bro. How many times are you getting fucked now? Can you see how your earlier years of slaying pussy could feed your ego and anger?

Over time I gained weight

You got fat and unattractive.

This was so good, I stopped fucking others, and settled down

Women would rather share a high value man than not have one at all. You were fucking everyone in town, she jumped on that ride because you probably had abundance mentality back then. But as most women do, they ratchet down a high(er) value man with manipulative games, auditioning (read: fucking) for the main role, and you bought it. She was just doing what she was designed to do.

I did drink more knowing I was rejected so frequently

You are a weak man that lacks self control, abundance mentality, and use substances to escape the reality that you are a weak man who isn't attractive.

Frequently I work at night to maintain the 200k salary.

Keep plowing those fields, plowhorse, because of your shitty financial decisions in life. Do you know how much a difference $150k v $200k is? Nothing. It doesn't improve your quality of life really the slightest. But you have (again) been a shitty financial captain and must plow to satisfy your wife's hypergamous desires for a beta-bucks.

She hates if I drink, anything. I am not a drunk, but she hates it, I drink coors light, maybe 4-5 beers, 4x weekly.

First - let's level set for a minute. Drop the ego. I used to drink the same amount. 4-5 beers, 4x-5x weekly. You and I both know that this was more like 6/7 nights a week, not 4. I'd drink them over 4-5 hours and never get drunk so I would justify this as "I am not a drunk". Whatever. Point being - your ego prevents you from seeing this was ever a problem and the only reason you quit was to appease her and secondly to get in shape.

Whatever. Just don't go do that again. You have problems with alcohol.

She never lost any weight after 3 kids, never worked, and complains that she is cleaning all day long.

Classic story of a lazy harpy housewife with an unattractive husband who is a shitty captain at leadership.

I'm skipping the rest of the shit you wrote about her because I don't fucking care. You have created a shitty wife. This is all your fault. She's likely depressed because you're a faggot.

I am extremely tone/fit everywhere....

Girls notice the shit out of me now

Good job on getting in the gym and lifting.

But you have zero abundance mentality and your have put your wife's pussy on a pedestal. She knows this, you know this, and being attractive means shit to her because of your shitty frame.

TRP 8+ months

And this is where I give the advice I wanted to give all along. TRP is (generally) for boys. MRP is (generally) for men.

There are outliers in TRP of men that I consider to be men of strong frame, good careers, have their shit together, and fuck like champs - married or unmarried - but in general the tone of TRP is geared more towards the age group of 16-26... like you were in your younger "alpha days". This is why you have made zero progress.

IMO 95% of the dudes in TRP are fucking idiots and faggots that learned some tricks to get laid. If you've been hanging out reading TRP shit for 8+ months, no wonder you haven't gotten anywhere. MRP is TRP on hardmode. You have to game the same fucking woman everyday (or not if you spin plates), and that shit requires the mental fortitude of a rock hard cock.

We have an MRP sidebar here. This is the missing puzzle piece you are missing. It will teach you how to mentally get to be the captain that you never knew you wanted to be. While it's rooted in TRP concepts, I've read both sidebars at MRP and TRP. MRP helps save the man. You're now in the right place. Best of luck.

Get the fuck out of /r/deadbedrooms . NOW.

Sidebar. This is the way.

SteelSharpensSteel · 2020-01-26T14:02:44+00:00

[deleted]

bliceroquququq · 2020-01-26T14:05:59+00:00

I’m confused, do you make $200k? I wasn’t sure if you made $200k, but then you said you made $200k, so I’m pretty sure you make $200k. Can you confirm that you make $200k?

FereallyRed · 2020-01-26T13:51:07+00:00

And they say there are only 7 stories.

This is a groundbreaking new plot twist, a true outlier in interpersonal dynamics!!!

Take a number, buddy.

weakandsensitive · 2020-01-26T14:39:58+00:00

Context says a lot.

All I know is you're fat. But nowhere do you actually say how fat you are right now. I'm guessing you're really fucking fat.

going to school for Dr.

If she was in med school, she's fucking dumb. If she wasn't in med school, she wasn't going to school for Dr.

Luckily, I just tweeted about women like her earlier.

I drink coors light, maybe 4-5 beers, 4x weekly.

lol

BlueMyLoad69 · 2020-01-26T17:18:59+00:00

OP, you are a Faggot. Don’t be a bigger faggot by deleting this post now that everyone is busting your balls. We bust everyone’s balls. I get my ass reamed out every time I post here. Do you know why? Because I’m a faggot too. We’re all faggots here, or at least we all started as faggots. Leave this post up, go back to it from time to time to see what a faggot you used to be. Don’t give up. Keep at it, read the sidebar and when you’re done start over. Keep lifting, and stop spending time thinking about your wife and what she thinks, wants, does, doesn’t do. Start fixing YOU because you’re sick of being a faggot, not because SHE’S sick of you being a faggot. Good luck, faggot.

RoccoPinkman · 2020-01-26T15:42:12+00:00

If you whine and DEER at home like you did in this post, is it really a surprise your wife doesn’t want to fuck you?

But at least you earn 200k, that makes up partly for you being such a massive faggot, NOT.

wheremyballsgo · 2020-01-26T15:35:11+00:00

100lb newb gains to squat I get but what's your secret to 100lb on bench so fast?

wheremyballsgo · 2020-01-26T15:45:51+00:00

We have a lot of debt, but because we eat out a lot.

She cooks dinner 4x weekly, but dines out (lunch, dinner) 6-7 weekly, or $200 a week.

Ok, is it we or she eat out a lot. $800 a month for 200k is what causes a lot of debt huh.

Sounds like you blaming her eating out for your debt lmao. I make a lowly 38k a year and I could manage $800 a month for that.

ChokingDownRP · 2020-01-26T16:36:19+00:00

Sounds like your biggest issue is that you are making yourself too easily available to someone who adds little to no value to your life. You also seem to have a lot of unattractive behaviors, like gaming, locking yourself in the office and drinking beers (alone). You need to learn to lead your family - making 200k (did you say that somewhere?) is fantastic... But you get no prizes for providing for your family. She resents you for being a beta provider instead of the fun bartender with sexual options. Get out of the house, start dressing better. Go out with friends more (without her).

Sepean · 2020-01-26T17:50:07+00:00

You, sir, are a fucking excellent beta. You fix all the stuff, make good money, got in shape, stopped bitching, and don't want to leave even when she's being a shitty wife.

Have you considered adding some alpha?

Would she question why I stopped asking for sex?

Why do you care? Have some frame, man, it doesn't matter what she says or thinks, it matters what you are.

coachdad8 · 2020-01-26T18:34:05+00:00

You've had more than enough guys mention all your faults so here's some real advice:

Get a mission. Nothing is less attractive than a man without any meaningful mission. You aren't making a difference in the world, you aren't on an exciting adventure, you aren't doing anything worthwhile. You know it and she knows it. No mission at 25 yrs old is ok, no mission at 35 isn't. DO SOMETHING WITH YOUR LIFE THAT CHANGES LIVES AND HELPS PEOPLE.
She's bored. I won't beat a dead horse because the guys have written about this hundreds of times, but your wife is a SAHM with no tingles hence the fatigue and whining. She probably spends a lot of time on her phone because it's giving her that sweet dopamine she isn't getting from you. A great adventurous mission would solve this.
You think money and abs and abundance and SMV will make a woman lust after you? Fine. Spend the next 3 years of your life lifting, making more money, being an alpha, getting numbers, having loads of women and then see what happens. I predict not much changes. And even if you do get your wife to have sex with you 4x a week, you'll still be unhappy. Why? Because THIS ISN'T YOUR PROBLEM and sex won't solve the underlying issue - that you have no meaning in your life. A guy has sex 4-6x a week and he's still unhappy because sex will never fulfill you long-term.
Read the sidebar and lift. But don't think that the end goal is to get more sex. You might or you might not, but the result will be the same - unhappiness. What you are unknowingly searching for is MEANING and PURPOSE. The sidebar, lifting, and becoming a strong, respected family leader will help you see that purpose more clearly. Good luck, hope that helps!

screechhater · 2020-01-26T18:26:27+00:00

Need clean up crew on aisle 7.

She. She. She. She. Her her her. Her

I work. She stays at home. I clean. I enable.

nombre1 · 2020-01-27T05:54:02+00:00

How much money do you make? I think I missed that in your post.

SBIII · 2020-01-26T15:54:08+00:00

How to calculate your SMV.

Start at 10, coz we're all 10s in theory.

Then subtract the following;

2 points for being a Beta Bux
2 points for being a useless, fat cunt
1 point for having a fat wife
1 point for having a lazy, harpy, SAHM and do nothing wife
2 points for drinking Coors light

That puts your SMV at 2 points from your perceived SMV and -1.6 from your real SMV.

Toowhammy · 2020-01-26T16:27:06+00:00

Your not totally fucked... well atleast your mindset. You seem to not have completely fallen off the cliff. I got banned from relationship advice because I told a guy that his wife isn’t asexual. She’s just not attracted to him. He actually believes this shit. He’s actually going to the internet to ask advice from inexperienced people on how to accommodate his wife’s asexuality. It’s almost as bad as people that think polyamory is a real thing. Atleast you found your way here.

Anyway... my spiel was about your reference to difference in libido between you and your wife. No such thing as low libido either bud. Only low attraction.

Cloudy_Pirate · 2020-01-26T17:22:48+00:00

Women will treat you as shitty as you let them. If she is treating you like crap, it’s because you allow her to do so.

Why do you allow it?

If you want to figure it out, read the sidebar and do the mental work.

NeoTheJuanDJ · 2020-01-27T23:06:42+00:00

Oh, you: - are blue pill and beta, and completely oblivious - are an alcoholic - hide from your wife when you drink - are in denial that your drinking is a problem - make great money - are the only one working - are paying off her med school loans while she sits on her ass, post grad, with $100k’s / year income potential flushed down the toilet because she doesn’t feeeeeel like it - tolerate laziness - tolerate her spending $200 of your money to shove food down her pie hole - tolerate star fish sex - do all the dishes and fold all the towels in hopes she’ll notice and touch your dick - tolerate her obesity - are unattractive (to say the least) - are out of the house all day and she’s home alone all day? - Have wife goggles like a morherfucker** - are seemingly okay with all of this - Blame it all on her and not yourself

It’s all your fault. Drop your ego. Realize this is all your fault. Every single point, listed above, is a red flag. You are beyond unattractive and she sees it. You don’t. You are lucky she is overweight and nobody is fucking her (at least Chad isn’t, maybe a beta gamer). You’re not home all day, so you wouldn’t know anyways. The second she gets a gym membership, it’s over.

Imaginary_Historian · 2020-01-28T23:26:55+00:00

What a great post! It made me see that despite that my own life isn't perfect, things could be worse. SO MUCH WORSE. I'll bookmark this for those times I need a pickup, to realize that actually, in comparison, my life is pretty damn fucking amazing.

Thanks for the inspiration!

LivingRPLife · 2020-01-26T13:50:46+00:00

Have you started with step 1 called SIDEBAR? You married a lazy gamer chick who doesn’t want to fuck beta Bob anymore. Step 2 is to throw that box in the trash- game box first, after you improve maybe her box.

capn_barnacles · 2020-01-26T14:34:57+00:00

How do baseboards become broken?

Hugenstein41 · 2020-01-26T13:49:33+00:00

Man bless you guys. Ground zero over and over again.

RP_PO · 2020-01-26T17:03:25+00:00

Impressive ego. It must take you far in life. Not far into your wife’s pants, but far.

RicoDunne · 2020-01-27T14:21:03+00:00

If you have been doing TRP for 8 months, then you should already know the answer to your question about withholding sex. Reading MRP and ask MRP and sidebar for even 1-day would tell you your answer.

Withholding sex from a person that doesn't value sex with YOU is a totally ridiculous strategy and will only make your situation worse.

Also stop living in the past. No one likes an Al Bundy wanna be. Get your current life mission on track.

A stay at home mom that can't cook or wants to go out to eat is a no-go for your budget and waist line. If she won't cook, then you cook for yourself and kids.

tightsleeves · 2020-01-27T14:44:27+00:00

Your spending 10 hours a day working on the wrong things.

200k is nice but your somehow in debt? How about working 8 hours a day and spend the last 2 'working' hours figuring out how to manage your financials.

You basically have a gamer wife at home who is addicted to games and pretends to clean so she can spend the next day gaming again. She has no concerns about loosing you and is enjoying her life

Vegasman20002 · 2020-01-27T19:40:25+00:00

How about reading the sidebar and becoming a man? You sound like me six months ago. Lift, work AND STFU for a few months then get back here. And post an OYS.

RolloAngerManagement · 2020-02-03T14:42:00+00:00

Three weeks later, still no OYS post. What a fucking waste of everyone's time.

wkndatbernardus · 2020-01-26T19:44:34+00:00

$200/week on eating out, just for her? No wonder she is A) blubbery and B) financially irresponsible. Both of these outcomes are your fault.

First thing I would do is put her on austerity measures like she was the nation of Greece. You want to stay in the EU (my family)? You won't be spending more than a specific amount that I put on a rechargeable debit card every week on Sundays (no more gyros everyday for lunch). If she stays home all day, that house should be sparkling AND a healthy meal better be on the table when you get home. That is the bare minimum for this gold digger to continue reaping the benefits of your plough horsing.

Blue_Andre · 2020-01-27T16:28:28+00:00

Why are you cleaning and doing other chores which you don’t want to do if you make $200k?! Even if you made less, I wouldn’t think that’s a deal. You’re the bread winner. You should make the rules. She should cater to you. She’s rarely sleeping with you, let alone not sleeping with you regularly. You’re getting a poor deal.

JasonStar79 · 2020-01-31T04:18:18+00:00

I make nearly 200k ... We have a lot of debt, but because we eat out a lot.

Debt from eating out when you make $200k? Maybe I missed it, but I think you left out the part where you're 300 lbs. Holy shit man.

juliusstreicher · 2020-02-13T11:36:48+00:00

You make 200K per year, and 10,000 of it dining out annually puts you deeply in debt?

Blue_Andre · 2020-01-26T22:03:04+00:00

What is all this info? Just get a second wife already. Or replace her and then get a second.

Livecrazyjoe · 2020-01-26T21:58:06+00:00

In my opinion you cant fix her. You can only fix yourself. Ask yourself what you want. You want to get laid basically.

So do it. Get a side girl friend. Get your sexual needs met. She may sense this and either start fighting with you or improve.

Dont stay stuck. Do something.

Blue_Andre · 2020-01-26T22:04:05+00:00

How would withholding sex FROM HER be helpful? For a whole year?! Isnt she the one withholding sex from you? And you're the man so why...?!

Title	Deny sex for a year? what dread level? *Starfish
Author	SelfFramed
Upvotes	23
Comments	147
Date	January 26, 2020 11:07 AM UTC (6 years ago)
Subreddit	Posted in /r/askMRP
Original Link	https://old.reddit.com/r/askMRP/comments/eu5err/deny_sex_for_a_year_what_dread_level_starfish/
Archive Link	https://theredarchive.com/r/askMRP/deny-sex-for-a-year-what-dread-level-starfish.315235 https://theredarchive.com/post/315235

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