Hi,

Last months has been up and down, framewise has been improvement last 4 month.

Yesterday we talked me and wife, she said she feels we are going in the wrong direction and we should be more thankful and less nagging. To which I agree of course.

I guess she is feeling that I have some frame now and that I am OK to be without her in the future(well, I have internalized and accepted the idea at least).

When we talked yesterday we got over into talking about sex. I asked her why it's so difficult for her, she explained it feels weird to give a blowjob or a handjob to me. Of course this is because the attraction isn't in place since she married me as BB not AF and I have tried to change this dynamic. She had a surprising amount of self insight and honesty actually, she explained that for her sex within the marriage "is different" and something more romanic and civilized. She doesn't like "dirty talk" etc. Same as above of course, she sees me as BB so nothing strange.

So she said "In order to give this I need to feel loved, that you do things that make me feel loved, like hanging the washing or [some other random chores]".

I pushed her slightly and asked her "So if I hang the washing you get horny?". She was at least honest enought to not say "yes" and instead got into some explanation about how sex with horniness was something belonging to when you were young and met someone "with a nice body" etc etc. Yea it's almost ridiculous how well it all fits with the RP models of hypergamy, BB vs AF etc.

She says that she feels like there is something wrong with her sexuality, that she is handicaped somehow that makes her unable to enjoy sex in a relation, but in reality she is probably and Alpha Widow since early years and likes strange.

None of us got much sleep in the night, wife was devastated because she felt how she's not good enough, she is "never enough", she feels pressured to have sex (i.e. no tingles) etc.

Today she called me at work crying, asking me what we should so, asking me to solve this, she says loves me and wants to be with me but she doesn't know what to do and ask me to "talk to some professional, find a solution".

So my question here is, is there anything I can actually do here to make this a turning point, or is it some kind of test she is throwing to pull me back?

Should I just kill the puppy now and move on, or is there any hope that she will come around finally, and if that is the case , what would your advice be?

Thanks for your input, peace