How to turn matches into dates?

Melinored · 2022-01-31T05:42:30+00:00

How much work we gotta do even after getting matched. I think I should give up online dating and start interacting with women in real life.

Aonghus_Radner · 2022-01-31T05:59:23+00:00

Start the Convo with "so when are we having our first date :)" saw it on another post from this Reddit works every time for me.

LocalPawnshop · 2022-01-31T06:16:26+00:00

In my opinion there’s nothing you can do that’ll turn matches into dates. Most of them want to meet up from around the start while others will just continue dry meaningless conversation because they want validation or they are into someone else more than you. Personally I ask them after a couple days and how they respond is very telling in my opinion. This is the main reason I’m quitting dating apps.

Condor-man3000 · 2022-01-31T06:08:52+00:00

Honestly, I will ask if they want to go out on Tuesday for dinner and in most cases they accept. Don't be a dumbass and ask the fifty questions via text. Be funny, be cute...then ask them out for coffee or drinks or dinner. Do it quick. Most of the time you text way too long or are not personable in your texts.

Also, you can't limp in when you text. Think about what you are going to say. You will get way better results with a quality response to 5 girls than a generic no thought response to 20. Be unique and genuine.

I am 44, so age can be a factor. I have found 30-40's don't enjoy penpals.

the_boss_jos007 · 2022-01-31T05:39:52+00:00

Hahaha same bro. I have had my tinder 2 weeks with 160 matches. Like 20 Snapchats and….0 dates lol 😂 😂😂😂

rahhumilovedogs · 2022-01-31T08:26:49+00:00

Just ask them. I wouldn't call it a date as it puts pressure. Just say wanna go grab a drink or something, i'm free at this and this? Don't be too flexible, dont be a simp about it. Easy easy.

Mistermistery101 · 2022-01-31T18:37:53+00:00

It's good that you have matches. And I'm also assuming you're getting matches at a good rate continuously. That's also good. Tbh, the hard parts over. This is how you actually turn the matches into dates:

Always be intentional when you message a girl. What do you want from the dating app? You mentioned dating, so every message you send her should be with that in mind. Setting up a date asap. Which means you want to vet out any girl who will waste your time.

1st message: say hi and then give her a polarizing compliment in the same message. I won't give you guys exactly what I say because I 100% know that you guys will overuse it, ruining it's effectiveness for me. But here's a good example. " Hey what's up [girls name]. You know exactly what you're doing with those sexy pics in your bikini😈😈". The main idea here is to setup a intimate/sexual frame. This is like the first test to vet a girl out. If she has any type of legitimate interest or curiosity in you, she will respond. If not, she won't.

2nd: she'll say something back like "thank you" with some stupid heart emoji or something. From there ask her what her plans are for the week. Again, you want to do this as soon as possible. If she sets up her answer in a way where it seems like she has the schedule of a U.S president, she's done. In other words, if she's telling you that she has no free time, 2 things are happening. Either a, she really has no free time (and in that case there's no point waiting for her in the first place). Or B (which is what it will be for 90% of women) is that she's indirectly telling you that she's not trying to see you. Either case, she's done and you shouldn't pursue further.

3rd: if she responds with vague but open answers (meaning she has free time), tell her to text or snap you. Do not ask her for her number. Give her your number or snap and Tell her. This is important because now you gauging compliance which is correlated to how interested she is into you. Getting her off the site, quickly at that, will set you apart from most of the other guys she's talking to. But the 4th and final step will set you apart from damn near everyone. And I will explain why.

4th: This is the most important step. This step will be the difference between getting a flake and an actual date. You might still get flaked on, but the odds are lower without it. What you want to do once she texted you or snap you is this- ask her when she's free today to FaceTime (for iphone). If you're on snap ask her when she's free to video call. If she doesn't have 5 minutes to talk to you then drop her. She was never going to meet you in the first place. If she gives you a time, just set it up and call her at that time. From there, just flirt and vibe with her. This is important because you're giving her a taste of what she'll experience when she meets up with you. She's having an actual experience with you when she's talking to you via video call or FaceTime. When it's just texting, it's so easy for women to flake because women can't get attached or invested in guys they just met through text. It's through vibes. During that video call, ask her when she's free that week and set up a date. Now me personally, I always setup a date at my place because I'm in a phase of my life where I keep things casual. But since you yourself told me what you want is a date, setup a date at Starbucks or a bar. Somewhere cheap. The reasoning isn't to be a cheapskate. It's to be smart while dating. If she tells you that she's not free, and doesn't offer a specific day next week, just tell her to text or call you when she has time. From there don't hit her up again until she messages.you first. If she declined this week but gives you a counter date next week that works for you, set it up but understand it could end up being a flake. A good rule of thumb is that for girls you haven't met before yet, the farther away the date is .the more likely she is to flake.

That's pretty much it. Like I said, the fourth step is the most important, and also the step that people will be most afraid to do. But if you guys can swallow your ego and actually get her on a video call, and then setup a date during that video call, you'll be getting more success. Now of course if you're not used to talking on a video call or FaceTime, just practice. I mean you have the matches to practice with. Eventually you'll get better at being smooth while on the phone and will be getting dates left and right. Good luck

truecrisis · 2022-01-31T05:41:54+00:00

Would you expect a girl (you just met 5 minutes ago) to let you stick your dick in her?

There is an order of operations.

1) match

2) chat

3) text

4) phone

5) coffee 1st date (can be same time as 6)

6) dinner/darts/beach/pool/drinking

7) touching/pushing

8) dinner at home

9) cuddling/movie

10)???

Some steps can be skipped, like the phone call. Personally I like the call because it removes any nerves on the date of meeting, and I personally have a nice voice to hook them on (I'm told).

To get the date "hey let's get coffee" To get the phone call "hey let's do a call sometime"

Woujo · 2022-01-31T15:39:09+00:00

The key with any kind of texting, including with Tinder, is to try to take the conversation somewhere deep and interesting so its stands out from her other conversations. Try to find something in her profile that is unique or interesting, and then somehow connect that with your own life. For example, if there is a picture of her surfing say something like "oh I love to surf, I have been doing it since I was 12." The more unique and interesting, the better.

rahhumilovedogs · 2022-01-31T08:29:53+00:00

match

text

bar

bang

block

My order.

GotThaAcid5tab · 2022-01-31T13:56:39+00:00

Matchtodateconverter.com

FaithInStrangers94 · 2022-01-31T15:44:37+00:00

Since 2018

Around 3000 matches

500 conversations

100 numbers/ Instagrams

30 first dates

10 second dates

3 3rd dates

1 4th date

0 5th dates 💀

mandoa_sky · 2022-01-31T06:00:46+00:00

find a public activity you both like doing. arrange to do it.

cravingsal · 2022-01-31T15:18:38+00:00

just ask bro. i mean i get many people wont want to but some will. tbh i hate texting, so as soon someone asks me out it’s like thank god! sure

erazedcitizen · 2022-01-31T16:17:31+00:00

Honestly, just ask them how their day was or something related to their bio, and if you see an opening, ask them to meet in person over coffee or something.

I don’t get a ton of matches, and rarely get responses back, but once they actually talk, I can usually get dates out of it

aStonedPanda94 · 2022-01-31T16:56:26+00:00

Start a normal conversation about their profile, if they don’t start it first. After a few fun messages back and forth, ask her if she’d like to meet up somewhere for a drink to get to know each other. That simple. If she says no or doesn’t respond she wasn’t worth your time.

Havregrot2000 · 2022-01-31T23:45:36+00:00

No, it's not hard. You present yourself chivalry and as a man with honour and integrity. If you find her interesting you say so. And you do it with all the charm you can muster up, show her you have humour. If she is up for meeting, then that's a date.

It's not a game that you play to win at all cost. You simply do it to meet people. Good luck!

fillfee · 2022-02-01T01:49:58+00:00

assuming you are male, you already put yourself above the other 90% of guys if you approach a girl in public and talk to her in public.

Nimexu · 2022-02-01T17:15:09+00:00

[permanently deleted]

MellowGuru · 2022-01-31T14:23:48+00:00

If I like someone i try to set up a phone call / video call. From there the step to meeting irl is much smaller. It helps a lot if they have already seen your energy and feel safe with you.

Superb-Bank9899 · 2022-01-31T07:45:08+00:00

Meet in public. Good for you and them.

henlofr · 2022-01-31T10:56:38+00:00

Don’t, just go out and meet people, it’s more fulfilling and way more fruitful.

Casanova-Quinn · 2022-01-31T14:42:19+00:00

Open with light and fun banter. Keep the conversation brief, avoid dozens of back and forth messages. If she's receptive and giving good responses, suggest grabbing a drink and ask for her number. Then get off the app and setup the date via text.

MarcellusxWallace · 2022-01-31T15:37:54+00:00

I just ask, if the conversation flows through text well enough.

“Fancy going out for food and/or drinks?”

Usually works. I’ve had 500+ matches in total and been on at least 15 dates. Definitely a numbers game

EpicPaul · 2022-01-31T17:48:52+00:00

Say something witty when matched > banter > add on snap/text > “you seem fun to talk to, we should go out for __ > date

jjboy91 · 2022-01-31T17:55:26+00:00

Your goal should be getting your match's number ASAP otherwise someone else will get in.

Various_Bass_7553 · 2022-01-31T17:57:37+00:00

I have had tinder for about 4 years, have had a couple dozen matches over that time, and I have never went on a date or had sex with a girl who I didn’t know in real life. There were a couple of girls I knew in real life who matched with me on tinder and we got together. With girls I matched with and didn’t previously know, most of them never responded.

ChurchofCaboose1 · 2022-01-31T21:10:17+00:00

I just ask. I asked the woman I've been seeing the last month within a few hours of us talking.

mustafarian · 2022-01-31T21:23:11+00:00

Its kind of a delicate balance tbh. Some ppl on here say to ask out right away, while this is a good way to ensure that they want to go out with you. I don't think its giving you much of an advantage if they say yes for when the actual interaction occurs. And alot of girsl will just ignore u or be turned off by u asking immediately.

you sort of needs to build some basic convo with them, but also with doses of flirty. If they are responding well to all of these and by that I mean, yall have talked for one day with good interaction and frequency. Ask her out next day and should be good. This way atleast you know the date will be good convo and its not like you go to the date from ground zero. You've gotta get them excited to meet u or else, one, they will jsut go and use you for a drink and not hit u up again, or two it won't be productive for what you want out of it.

Ok_Software7332 · 2022-01-31T18:29:24+00:00

If they actually like you, they’ll want to go on a date with you. Others just want validation or just don’t like you enough, unless you somehow impress them over text. Even in matches, you’re competing with other dudes.

So essentially, making your profile even better and more interesting will improve your chances. That or just keep trying.

Title	How to turn matches into dates?
Author	Nimexu
Upvotes	95
Comments	85
Date	January 31, 2022 5:29 AM UTC (4 years ago)
Subreddit	Posted in /r/seduction
Original Link	https://old.reddit.com/r/seduction/comments/sgteo4/how_to_turn_matches_into_dates/
Archive Link	https://theredarchive.com/r/seduction/how-to-turn-matches-into-dates.1267902 https://theredarchive.com/post/1267902

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