[deleted by user]

bcool_returns · 2022-01-28T00:21:16+00:00

Ask her out, dude. It's already been a whole month since you guys last met in the flesh. The majority of "getting to know her" happens in person. If she says yes, that's a promising early sign. If she gives you the runaround, well, now you can move on.

Rev_Irreverent · 2022-01-28T03:24:42+00:00

If her name is Jessica, run. My friend has a farmhouse in Nebraska, you can hide there.

MyName_isLame · 2022-01-28T03:33:45+00:00

I’m a girl. My take on it is she’s keeping you on the back burner just in case, but she has her sights on somebody else as her main priority. If I were you I would keep her number maybe for the future but I wouldn’t invest in her right now. It’s all about timing. It’s not time

RoseTinted64 · 2022-01-28T03:22:30+00:00

Texting should only be used to set up a date. She might not be that into you, but since you have a mutual friend she doesn’t want to ghost you.

tfusername · 2022-01-28T00:17:21+00:00

Not everyone is a chat person. You could ask her to appoint a call, if you really want to maintain communication.

bigbootynopussy · 2022-01-28T04:55:13+00:00

She’s probably thinking about what to say during those 16 hours. That’s why i take forever but come back with long responses. You should ask her out though

monkey36937 · 2022-01-28T00:49:43+00:00

Build comfort> get NUM> build little more comfort> set up meet up/ date, if she says doesn't say yes then forgot about her and move on to the next girl. Repeat the process again.

universityhound · 2022-01-28T04:08:42+00:00

This has happened to me also where the girl takes 16-24 hours between each text, but we text huge block of texts to each other.

Found out after 3 "dates" she thought of me as a friend.

I hope after you guys meet the texting frequency increases. Texting frequenting is an indicator of interest.

MattPruga · 2022-01-28T09:38:31+00:00

shes not intersted

Fancy_Disaster_Pony · 2022-01-28T11:28:15+00:00

Honestly?

Isn’t it a nice change when someone isn’t attached to their phone at all times?

Haven’t we all been wanting to spend time with someone, and they’re checking their phone every five minutes. They’re not really present with you, they’re off in virtual lala land.

The man I’m seeing takes 1-2 days between texts. He’s a terrible texter. But if I need to call him he is there for me to really listen and engage genuinely. When we spend time together there is such a lovely warm connection because neither of us are on Instagram. He really listens when I’m talking and remembers little things I said months ago

I don’t match his reply times. Sometimes I reply within 5 minutes, sometimes it’s several hours. Sometimes the next day. Depends how busy I am

Technology is cool and all but it has placed this expectation that we are all obliged to be available for communication all day every day. It sounds like she has healthy boundaries and isn’t looking to dive into a relationship immediately.

If she’s sending paragraphs and asking questions, she clearly enjoys talking to you. So ask her over for dinner out to go to the zoo or do paint ball.

Go for it, dude. And just chill :P

Edit: I see from other comments that she gave you the run around when you asked her out. Ask her again. If she gives you the run around again, tell her you’ve really enjoyed talking to her but you’re looking for dating/relationship/whatever it is, and you’ll have to move on but that you wish her all the best. Keep it warm, but establish the boundary that you don’t want to be her pen pal

Saxon2010 · 2022-01-28T01:13:37+00:00

I dated a girl exactly like this. One day when we were hanging out and kind of drinking she disclosed to me how she wishes I would text her quicker. I kind of played it off like “oh I do sometimes” but in reality I was only mirroring her response time. But I was not going to tell her that.

Honestly in my experience is that there is nothing you can do, it’s out of your control, I wouldn’t bring it up because it would sound kind of needy (especially if you aren’t in a relationship). If it bothers you that much, just move on.

NattyGains4Life · 2022-01-28T02:46:54+00:00

Dude just ask out, you already spent a month and you’re still in this “back and forth” awkward situation

Just ask out, yes- cool, no-move on

Simple

Try to spend no more than a week texting someone and try to ask out more quick than that

videogames_ · 2022-01-28T06:51:27+00:00

She put you as text buddies. Ask her to meetup again and if she doesn't then move on.

pikecat · 2022-01-28T10:11:15+00:00

Keep in touch, pursue other girls. You have no relationship with her now. Sometimes you know someone just a bit during a while, then something starts at a later date sometimes it doesn't. Stop worrying about it, live life, keep in touch with many people.

annanas____ · 2022-01-28T12:41:52+00:00

That’s literally me. I don’t like texting plus I’m a busy person, so I usually take some time maybe twice a day, usually in the morning or at night, when I answer all my private messages. This also means that I take some time and do longer replies. In between I only answer messages that require an instant reply, like when someone is upset or when we’re making plans or I send voice messages while I’m walking my dog.

delusionalubermensch · 2022-01-28T01:29:22+00:00

Texting compatibility is a real thing. Can you imagine a whole relationship like this? If not and you are looking for a relationship, just let her go.

Amberstar89 · 2022-01-28T00:16:52+00:00

Does it bother you? If so, then maybe you could ask her about it! Doesn’t need to be in a rude way or anything. Or suggest a different method of communication - FaceTime, phone call, lol…..email? Do you guys meet in person? Maybe ask then!

Melinored · 2022-01-28T07:02:13+00:00

This is fishy... most of the time if girls are taking longer to reply then that's a red sign along with that you will see them giving one word responses but this girl does reply and keeps the conversation going by asking you questions and writes long paragraphs.

Maybe some girls have different patterns but anyways if you feel exhausted when texting her. Leave it man ! Maybe meet her and you'll know better whether to be with her or let her go.

YouYongku · 2022-01-28T09:43:33+00:00

" hi why you take so long to reply? Did you left your phone at home and flew to London? And then flew back to grab your phone to reply me?"

The_fractal_effect · 2022-01-28T01:22:12+00:00

Ask her out

kodu5 · 2022-01-28T01:36:33+00:00

Ask her out already. She might not know how you view her. She obviously likes you enough if she’s writing long messages. Just clinch the deal.

bittycoin369 · 2022-01-28T06:05:33+00:00

I think she’s only kind of interested. Maybe just when it’s convenient or she’s feeling like talking to people. Probably enjoys talking to you but not going to prioritize it. She’s keeping the ball on her side of the court. If you’re looking for something serious soon, move on

ahadman24 · 2022-01-28T06:07:51+00:00

You should have asked her out earlier. Sadly you are friendzoned. Get the fuck out of this confused space and hit on other girls:-))

Stallrim · 2022-01-28T08:27:58+00:00

Just ask her out again, or if it's too much, call her to see how she responds, if it goes well then ask her out on phone, but if she keeps doing such behavior, just move on to another girl and don't pay much attention to this one, she might do some extra legwork to get your attention back if she realizes you are losing interest in her, but don't fall for it, once you give her the attention she needs, she'll start acting like this again.

Just be aware of these things and do trial and error, just don't waste too much time on her, the regrets afterward are really bad. All in all, being with someone shouldn't feel like a chore, even tho if they are interested in you.

Taiyella · 2022-01-28T08:34:25+00:00

Maybe try and call her and see what the vibe is like. I’d probably ask her out again depending on her response leave it be.

VDKay · 2022-01-28T08:39:05+00:00

Golden Rule: Use texts ONLY to exchange necessary information and organize dates. Keep smalltalk for the actual date. PERIOD.

If she rejects the date, she wasn't available to begin with and now you've saved several hours/days of waiting and stressing.

Storm484 · 2022-01-28T09:03:22+00:00

I’d stop talking to her and see if she messages you

frecklerat · 2022-01-28T09:29:56+00:00

i am a chick who does this to people. honestly i get side tracked and my mental health isn’t great at times which makes me ignore peoples texts. no idea if this girl has similar reasons but sometimes she’s just got other stuff on her mind

rico1V1 · 2022-01-28T10:29:07+00:00

Her interest in you is very low, i suggest not to date just one specific women, date multiple and choose wich one is for you.

sam_phil · 2022-01-28T10:54:29+00:00

Instead of getting disappointed later, disappoint now & stopping texting her. She comes to you only when she has no one to talk or to text. Next time whenever she sends you a long text, just ask instantly can we connect on call if she gives you some excuse. Don't bother to respond & delete her number.

RedPillAlphaBigCock · 2022-01-28T11:32:17+00:00

She might just be busy and have a life , the long paragraphs are a a good sign , it dosnt really matter though , just ask her out

TheTruth221 · 2022-01-28T11:37:38+00:00

she knows her worth u got to play the game right

jjboy91 · 2022-01-28T12:33:04+00:00

Either not interested, either she you as a friend, either okay mind games and succeeding.

Ask her out or move on, who has time to waste 😁

kex_ari · 2022-01-28T12:56:15+00:00

Lol why are you texting?

banditcleaner2 · 2022-01-28T14:01:00+00:00

16-24 hours isn't even that long truthfully. how old are you? if you're mid 20's or older, people have shit going on in their lives and aren't glued to their phones (or at least most people). if you don't, then that is unattractive to women from my experience because it means she can see that if you were to date, she would be almost your entire world which is clingy/needy (turn off)

I would suggest you get some more hobbies and shit if you feel that 24 hours is too long of a time to respond, especially if you're new friends

daysinnroom203 · 2022-01-28T14:09:24+00:00

Sounds like she’s not a texter. I have a few friends that answer back within hours, and several who take days. Without knowing her, I don’t necessarily think it’s indicative of anything- but at some point you need to make a plan and see her in person.

Sensitive-Permit-877 · 2022-01-28T15:18:46+00:00

Okay men stop texting back and forth. Please just text to initially setup the first real date. After that if she texts you answer. But when you engage from first date on you Call. Dont text. Please guys stop texting

denali_HD2020 · 2022-01-28T15:22:26+00:00

The phone should only be used for setting dates. Get to know her in person over dinner.

Street-External-9681 · 2022-01-28T15:42:02+00:00

Ask for a date if she's interested. She will reply I am a girl and I usually reply very late if I am not interested.

ImpossibleRow6849 · 2022-01-28T16:09:06+00:00

She is using you as an option SOS

Title	[deleted by user]
Author	[deleted]
Upvotes	99
Comments	72
Date	January 28, 2022 12:12 AM UTC (4 years ago)
Subreddit	Posted in /r/seduction
Original Link	https://old.reddit.com/r/seduction/comments/secy3r/deleted_by_user/
Archive Link	https://theredarchive.com/r/seduction/deleted-by-user.1268119 https://theredarchive.com/post/1268119

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