[Let's Watch] A feminist movie about toxic masculinity: The Mask You Live In

DarkLord0chinChin · 2017-07-13T12:00:58+00:00

Masculinity is fragile, just like reputation is fragile for example. Men are valued for what they achieve, not for their ovaries

single_use_acc · 2017-07-13T14:35:56+00:00

Lemme guess, "toxic masculinity" is being defined by women?

Littleknownfacts · 2017-07-13T12:09:23+00:00

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dicklord_airplane · 2017-07-13T17:55:40+00:00

my issue with this film is that the film makers portray all of these issues as something that men do to other men, but it doesn't recognize all the ways that women reinforce men's social isolation and unfounded feelings of shame and inadequacy for simply being a regular dude.

in my life, i've gotten a lot more "man up" bullshit from women than i have from men. women, not men, tell me that a man ain't shit if he can't buy nice things for women. that a man ain't worth having if he doesn't confidently approach women, take the lead, and take on all responsibility for romantic relationships. it's women, not men, who criticize male sexuality as something creepy and dangerous, which makes a lot of men feel ashamed of their sexual urges. it's women, not men, who tell me that a man ain't shit if he doesn't get into fights to protect a woman's honor.

these feminist pieces are just preaching to their own choir with the message that all of men's problems are caused by men and maleness alone. it's high time that feminists grew some balls and started to examine all the shitty ways that women promote poor mental health and isolation in men's lives. that would be revolutionary and might actually bring about some positive change in men's lives.

BiggerDthanYou · 2017-07-13T13:19:50+00:00

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Casshern1973 · 2017-07-13T12:06:54+00:00

I repress emotion because I don't trust people around me, I do the same if I were a woman. Crying is ok if you are with friends, if you are among manipulative bastards it's a mistake that you will pay. And a lot of the "crying is ok" people are of that category...

5th_Law_of_Robotics · 2017-07-13T12:32:41+00:00

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5th_Law_of_Robotics · 2017-07-13T12:58:41+00:00

I think that movie is based on a strawman stemming from a poor understanding of the phrase "toxic masculinity".

2017-07-13T18:35:01+00:00

Step outside the boundaries of masculinity and see what happens...

quotient_is · 2017-07-13T13:26:28+00:00

I gave the trailer a try, because that's what you do on a debate sub. Seriously guys, how can you effectively counter an argument without listening to the other side?

The message itself isn't derogatory. It is the same point that MRAs make about how restrictive the traditional male stereotype is, with an added dose of "femininity isn't wrong."

Being discouraged from crying or showing any weakness harms men, see rates of male suicide. Being expected to provide at all costs and demonstrate superiority through physical means and degrading behavior (i.e. hazing) harms men. Being expected to self-sacrifice for women to protect and/or prove one's male-ness harms men. Being assumed to care less about your children harms men.

There are arguments to be made that some of these behaviors are the result of male social evolution, but that's basically the point. Social Darwinism is profoundly harmful to those who are not at the top (and maybe even those at the top, too, but in a different way.) That's the whole 80/20 argument in a nutshell. TRP advocates for men to embrace that competition as a sexual strategy because that's just how things are. It's unfortunate, as that attitude contributes to the same issues that harm men so much.

The issue with the term toxic masculinity is in the delivery and the resulting connotation. If positive reinforcement is more effective than negative reinforcement, why would it make sense to promote a term that relates toxicity to one of the core aspects of a human's identity? This both leads to push back from people who don't buy the intended meaning (TRP guys) and allows for co-opting from people who would push that negative connotation (radfems).

My suggestion for this issue is to focus on the behavior, not on the gender perceived to relate to the behavior. We can explore why a person (or persons) acts in ways that are unhealthy (whether that's by being too stoic or being too quick to identify as a victim) without casting a divisive shadow onto the whole of that person's gender or in-group.

thepurplepillman · 2017-07-13T12:45:48+00:00

Nope, not until we start getting an examination on how women uphold gendered expectations on men.

5th_Law_of_Robotics · 2017-07-13T19:23:59+00:00

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Atlas_B_Shruggin · 2017-07-13T16:19:32+00:00

the facial ratios (wide face/short lip-to-chin tip ratio or just short chins)and vocal timber of the voices of the male commentators/analysts in the trailer tells me everything i need to knwo about them and the men accepting/promulgating these ideas

i know not ONE of you failed to perceive the voices of the men

[deleted] · 2017-07-13T23:09:51+00:00

Yes, it's men that cause all of this. When are we going to get an honest representation of this problem, which is that women play just as much of a part in repressing men?

Electra_Cute · 2017-07-13T12:16:43+00:00

Some of the users on here will not even read about what toxic masculinity means, what possessed you think any of them would watch an entire movie.

theiamsamurai · 2017-07-13T15:29:11+00:00

"The Mask You Live In"

Kinda an ironic name, considering that it's WOMEN who wear make-up, don't you think?

Wallstreet3 · 2017-07-13T18:08:48+00:00

Toxic Masculinity does not exist in a vacuum. It does not form out of the ether nilly-willy.

Toxic masculinity is nothing more than a reflection of femininity.

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BiggerDthanYou · 2017-07-13T19:37:10+00:00

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BookwormJane · 2017-07-13T18:12:52+00:00

I have recommended this movie before right here, it's amazing.

[deleted] · 2017-07-13T18:35:01+00:00

Step outside the boundaries of masculinity and see what happens...

[deleted] · 2017-07-13T18:35:01+00:00

Step outside the boundaries of masculinity and see what happens...

HiDefFX · 2017-07-13T18:59:43+00:00

I watched the movie on Netflix and one of the narratives is that of a single father living with his son. He talks about how in the beginning that he couldn't connect with his son initially, because he didn't really know how to respond to his son being "sensitive", ultimately grew more accustomed and even found ways to connect with him. Which brings up an interesting issue about father/son interactions. It made me think about if sacrificing some form of stoicism, and hardness was a necessary for a better relationship with a son.

I grew up with a father that was stereotypically stern ("yes sir", "no sir" vibe). Which was fine for me growing up and I would say I turned out fine. But, in the case of having a son who is more emotionally animated, growing up with someone like my dad would have made him hate him. Which could have a worse outcome into adult life.

IIHotelYorba · 2017-07-13T21:16:55+00:00

Yes, let's watch this piece of propaganda. This is exactly the type of shit feminists deny that they say.

despisedlove2 · 2017-07-14T01:28:25+00:00

Lol.

Predictable. Feminists using men's innate natures against them. And then passing the blame for the result off on to men.

Dominic_Badguy · 2017-07-13T15:47:11+00:00

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Title	[Let's Watch] A feminist movie about toxic masculinity: The Mask You Live In
Author	BiggerDthanYou
Upvotes	9
Comments	259
Date	July 13, 2017 11:22 AM UTC (9 years ago)
Subreddit	Posted in /r/PurplePillDebate
Original Link	https://old.reddit.com/r/PurplePillDebate/comments/6n0zsv/lets_watch_a_feminist_movie_about_toxic/
Archive Link	https://theredarchive.com/r/PurplePillDebate/lets-watch-a-feminist-movie-about-toxic.267012 https://theredarchive.com/post/267012

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