Great chemistry over text, not in person
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Just wondering if this has ever happened to anyone? You get along great over text/OLD, have a lot in common, like each other's pics, then in person it's not the same. Was there something you could put your finger on, or was it an overall feeling, or lack of feeling?
I had a date last weekend, we met on OLD. All of the above, had a lot in common, had great conversations, etc. He said he thought I was very attractive and loved my personality even more. We talked every single day. On the day of our meeting, he said he was nervous. That evening, he picks me up and he was super quiet and things were kind of awkward. I was very nervous too. I can be shy, but with an outgoing person I feel fine, but with another quiet/shy person, then my shyness comes out more.
When things were good and the conversation was good, I liked him, very nice, very polite. But there were a lot of uncomfortable silences. I also spent the majority of the date having no clue if he liked me or not. Wasn't flirty at all and didn't touch me...not even like touching my arm when he talked like some people do. It wasn't until literally in the last 5 minutes of the movie that he held my hand, and again on the way out to the car. He did also ask during the movie if I wanted to do something the next day and I said yes.
We went back to my place and just watched tv/talked, but again, lots of uncomfortable silences. He did eventually kiss me, but only when he thought I was sleeping because we both dozed off since it was getting late.
So after the first kiss, it led to more and we ended up having sex. Please don't judge, I'm in my 40's, I never plan to have sex on the first date but if it happens it happens. I've always thought the third date rule was dumb. So anyway, afterward he finally goes home, it's really late. I have a history lately of getting ghosted, so I asked him a few days prior to please just tell me if he wasn't feeling it.
So the next day he texts me and says that he had fun the night before, but he wanted to be honest because I asked for that, and said he wasn't sure I was the one for him. I wasn't too broken up by this, as I was having doubts that morning too. I am over my ex enough to date, but being that this was my first date since him, I was feeling kind of blah and comparing everything to him. How my first date with him was so easy, and how comfortable I was with him, etc. So I kind of felt like things were pretty mutual about our feelings.
Then he asked if I would consider having sex again. Before I met him, I was open to a FWB, and the sex was good so I figured why not. So we hung out that day, and will again next weekend. But in the days since, I've found myself confused again. I am not sure what it is, maybe the fact that he doesn't want to date me has now made me want him...wanting what I can't have? Or maybe I am just curious where a second date could have gone if we were more relaxed and not so nervous. And I'm really confused how he could seem to like me so much all week over text, and then not be sure about me in person. I mean, I guess it could just be a feeling....but I personally always have a pretty good idea if things will translate to in-person. I'd say I've never been surprised, if I didn't really vibe online/over text, then it's the same in person. And if we do hit it off online, it's always been a hit in person.
I'm good with either, if he's just a FWB, or if down the road we end up dating. But I guess I am a little sad to think of how much we seemed to click over text that whole week and in person, it wasn't the same at all.
EDIT: THIS IS NOT ME! This is a cut and paste from another dating sub
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