Do men tend to care more about you when you're thinner, and more attractive?

ManguZa · 2021-10-17T18:13:22+00:00

Yes of course, but that's only part of the equation. Your character also need to be attractive. Be respectful, gentle, joyful...

nayvote · 2021-10-17T20:26:45+00:00

You already know the answer.

Zealousideal_Tea_735 · 2021-10-17T18:10:57+00:00

Tbh yes

aigars2 · 2021-10-17T21:28:16+00:00

Brutally? Okay. Word thinner doesn't fit here. I believe the words you're looking for is ... not fat. Thinner is something completely different and has nothing to do with BMI. Do you yourself like fat men? Or fat prettier men?

TheRedPill1978 · 2021-10-17T22:13:24+00:00

Yes but this also works the other way around too. Women treat really attractive men much better than unattractive men. This is esp evident in online dating where the majority of men get ignored since they aren't physically attractive enough.

It's life....Focus on what you can change......Being in shape helps alot too. Being skinny but not too skinny helps too. Etc...

Looks do matter alot but as long as you're at least average looking face wise and in decent shape, you'll be able to make it up in other ways (personality, etc).

jaja668 · 2021-10-17T21:11:40+00:00

Yes, but it should be the cherry on top of a beautiful, cultured person. In the context of a respectful relationship.

Content warning: abuse and disordered eating. I was in an abusive marriage and I naively believed that pushing myself to the brink of insanity to be ever thinner and sexier would make my husband cherish me. Yes, men treat you better when you’re thinner - “clean-limbed,” as said in Fascinating Womanhood. Get to a balanced, healthy, attractive thinness and wait until you’ve vetted your man carefully (and watched your own mental health) before making the extra effort. Just my 0.02$.

TL;DR yes they do, but it will not make a man incapable of loving you, love you more.

bytesunfish · 2021-10-17T18:18:59+00:00

Initial attraction will fade regardless of your body composition. What is attractive that doesn't fade is men are attracted to people who care about themselves. Body composition is an indicator of that. If you don't appear like you can take care of yourself, what does that indicate (however falsely) about your ability to care for a partner or kids? What might it indicate about your self control and discipline?

Also, if the guy is active, he wants someone who has the capability to be active with him. He wants to feel like he can take on the world with you, not that you'll weigh him down and whine on a short hike.

Arm candy is a real thing. Social indicators from others that he has a prize reinforce his decision to stay and invest with you.

Not to detract from your subject, but don't forget about other traits and hyper fixate on the aesthetics as you improve yourself. A lot of women will forget that and misattribute their lack of success on looks alone when there are other issues that they choose not to address. Hope this all helps

Teacup000 · 2021-10-17T20:35:43+00:00

I have a BMI of about 18 - strangers, usually men, have been very considerate of me on the rare occasion I fly with the baby to visit my parents without my husband.

I usually have multiple offers to help me with my bags when I board and deboard with the baby strapped to me in a carrier, and I often accept. There's nothing sexual or romantic about helping a woman with a baby as far as I can tell, I think the offers come from the fact that I'm petite and look like I could use the help. I certainly appreciate it, seeing as the baby is heavy at about a fourth of my weight!

I imagine I would see similar behavior if I was still dating but I can't guarantee it. My husband does frequently comment about me being small/cute/pretty and I enjoy that attention quite a bit. Men were usually kind to me when I was dating but I still got ghosted every now and then on dating apps. I don't think anyone can avoid that completely.

Whisper · 2021-10-17T18:49:08+00:00

Somebody summon Captain Obvious, please.

northernboarder · 2021-10-17T20:35:52+00:00

I think you already know the answer you just don’t want to admit it

Tyrant597 · 2021-10-17T18:58:14+00:00

http://www.reddit.com/r/RedPillWomen/comments/lzo0e1/learning_about_the_male_protective_instinct_from/

doom_guy69420 · 2021-10-18T01:47:27+00:00

we men mostly find women that are in a healthy state more attractive, and no being bone thin isn't what we want, (I can't speak for every man but in my personal taste a woman with some natural muscle definition is quite attractive) in reality we really just want a woman that is healthy, not overweight, not a skeleron, but if we get to know that person and know they want to get better we will want to help them improve themselves mentally and physically, because that's what us men are hardwired to do, fix things.

also don't be afraid to ask a man out or send the first text, because if your worrying about a guy not texting you its may be because he is probably scared of being rejected (also the whole men making the first move thing is a weird societal construct anyway)

also, make up, not something you asked about but I thought I might as well cover it, I personally don't like it when it's worn to mask imperfections (if it's in an artistic way then it's cool) we aren't looking for perfect, we're looking for real

we care about people that care about us, but remember everyone needs me-time every once in a while, whether that's with the bois or by ourselves ,don't be afraid to ask for time alone

also never try to imitate the person you like (I learned the hard way)

anyway that's it, hope I helped at all

(and no I'm not some old married dude just a guy with a bit of common sense.i tried my best to separate my opinion and truth and think I did well)

have a blessed day/night

chrissiecakes · 2021-10-18T04:24:58+00:00

It helps to be pretty, yes. Being thinner also helps. Women who put effort also in themselves is what men like. What i've learned is that you have to not only be pretty, but have good character, values, behaviour, etc. Men/ people in general look for certain characteristics. Even you would when you look for a friend. :) so, you just need to find the right person for you. 🥰

I think men just don't like too fat. :) not necessarily thin :)

RiseAndPanic · 2021-10-18T18:37:21+00:00

In my own experience, yes, kind of. Granted I’ve never been overweight, but I do think I got a bit more male attention when I was smaller and fitter (although I still get attention at the size I am now, which is average/normal).

HOWEVER - Here’s something interesting, and I’m not sure if anyone’s experienced this, but I’ve noticed a more drastic difference in male attention with my hair color. I notice I get hit on more when my hair is highlighted or blonde vs. my normal/natural brunette.

Key-Progress-8873 · 2021-10-17T20:56:07+00:00

How you look is not the only thing that is important to a man, but it's the number 1 most important thing.

Nowadays most men are so lonely that they'll even settle for fat women, but to any man that has any standards, being fat is going to be a dealbreaker.

Why? Because it's repulsive. It's repulsive on men too, but the "largeness" of look and silhouette is more tolerable on a man than on a woman, because men are meant to be "large" (though more like a bear than a walrus), while women aren't.

Also, women are meant to be nurturing & caretakers of children and a home. Being fat is a terrible signal when it comes to that. It shows that the woman can't even take care of her own body, let alone a child. I would never have children with a woman who is fat mainly because of this. Not to mention obesity is disastrous for fertility as well.

You asked for brutal honesty and you got it. Good luck shedding the fat.

sinisterforces · 2021-10-17T23:40:24+00:00

Haven’t been fat (I have been heavier than I am now for a brief period of time after taking a medication, but I lost it very quickly again and it was within normal range) but in terms of attractiveness, I think everyone treats me better than when I am not. I look quite average I think. Nowhere near popular girls on Tiktok, but not really ugly either. That looks give you so much in life is a major black pill, but it is what it is. That’s the brutal truth. I also think men care way more about looks than we think they do.

LanPartyPizza · 2021-10-18T10:54:55+00:00

Short term, absolutely. It diminishes with time.

GamesOfTheMind · 2021-10-18T17:32:59+00:00

FINALLY, a woman asking the right questions. Yes.

zino193 · 2021-10-18T10:02:40+00:00

men tend to care more about you, as in make efforts to initiate dates with you, messages you first, etc.

Those are different things. Caring about you - and wooing you are different things. I would also argue wooing and giving you attention are different things.

Attention is the lowest form of validation you can get because it's literally a reflex. Show boobs - get noticed. It's a literal male reflex, unconscious. It tells you nothing of your value, your relevance or the man's actual interest.

What you seem to talk about is wooing- investing time in you - getting to know you and starting to care about you the person. Yeah - looks matter - just like they matter for you if you're honest with yourself and acknowledge there's tons of men you don't actually want to spend time with and hear about their mundane day or highly specific woes.

emmalai85 · 2021-10-17T21:20:57+00:00

I've seen curvy/chunky girls get way more male attention than thinner, smaller breasted ones. So it really depends.

wispo-wills · 2021-10-18T03:35:19+00:00

Idk about if they "care more". I don't think they do. I think that more depends on what you are willing to accept with who you attract. I attract plenty of men who pretend to be nice to me just to have sex with me because I'm so "sexy" and "beautiful" (🙄). While it helps to be thin and attractive, it's critical that you be discerning with who you allow into your life. Don't settle for men who don't give you that spark.

PigletRadiant · 2021-10-18T03:41:33+00:00

Yes, it keeps their attention.

dadudenines · 2021-10-18T07:56:17+00:00

I really like MarriedRP's pattern of posting OP's stats (height, weight, age, etc.) before their wall of text...

Men get more emotional supply from thinner women. It is not something they can control. Other factors can be valued also such as loyalty and cooperation, but you can't get around the fact thinner means healthier, younger, more fertile and therefore more valuable at some primal level.

Men have their rational side and can mitigate that feeling, especially if they know they are lower SMV themselves or see other value. But few women really play up things besidss "Here is me. I am valuable. Accept it, unconditionally."

hardlander · 2021-10-18T12:58:47+00:00

Imo I don't want to sound mean but most men are looking for thin or regular sized women. A women that is heavier than us is a turnoff knowing that weight is an insucrity for us men, we often want to be heavier ourselves by muscle mass and the ones that are heavy it's usually too much fat that they're trying to get rid off.

TheSunshineMan · 2021-10-22T03:02:49+00:00

Of course, because your value goes up.

Endor-Fins · 2021-10-23T00:34:12+00:00

Care about you more and treat you better? No. Be more attracted to you? Yes.

aussiedollface2 · 2021-10-23T11:24:08+00:00

Yes. I’ve fluctuated between weights and so has my best friend. The attention, admiration, and general happiness that men have around you when you’re slimmer and looking good is actually alarming. But it is what it is, that’s how the world works and it took me a long time to accept that xo

whydoesthishapp3n · 2021-10-24T02:51:30+00:00

you’re asking the wrong question unless you’re trying to fuck all men or multiple or a bunch. the question you need to be asking should the man that i want to spend my time with be so concerned about my body that he treats me worse when it isn’t perfect? stop trying to impress all men. you want just one, i’m assuming. if you want shallow men then yeah, worry about your weight. you don’t want a lot of dates. you want the date that turns into a relationship.

LateralThinker13 · 2021-10-26T14:13:03+00:00

I ask because I am around a 33 BMI and am working on it ( already lost 2 lbs!) but most men I've dated didn't seem to care about me

A woman at 33BMI doesn't register as a HVF. Would you listen to a 33BMI man the same way you'd listen to Brad Pitt?

Title	Do men tend to care more about you when you're thinner, and more attractive?
Author	Ididityoudidnt
Upvotes	71
Comments	51
Date	October 17, 2021 6:05 PM UTC (4 years ago)
Subreddit	Posted in /r/RedPillWomen
Original Link	https://old.reddit.com/r/RedPillWomen/comments/qa42t4/do_men_tend_to_care_more_about_you_when_youre/
Archive Link	https://theredarchive.com/r/RedPillWomen/do-men-tend-to-care-more-about-you-when-youre.1078968 https://theredarchive.com/post/1078968

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