Hello all! I wanted to share my story of how FDS really helped me level up in the past year.

Before COVID, I was the sidekick. I would follow people everywhere, I was so eager to make friends that I would withdraw my boundaries, and I rarely stood up for myself. I was a pickmeshia in friendships and that led me to be one in relationships (especially my most recent ex).

My "friends" loved to put me down in favor of themselves, tell me that I did not deserve the things that I worked for, or they would ignore me in conversations. My ex would not respond for days and then act like nothing was wrong when he finally did respond. I believe that the worst part about all of this was that I let them treat me like this.

Then... COVID. All of my friendships/relationships crumbled due to distance or lockdowns. Most ended with ghosting on either my part or theirs.

I was so interested in finding out what happened between all my "friends," my ex, and I. Obviously, I could not reach out due to the state of how things were left so I started searching online and came across FDS.

This is where I started to level-up.

Not only did I read the handbook inside and out, I read nearly every thread that I could get my hands on, and religously checked each day for new posts.

Eventually, I moved for my new career. Once I got back to working in person and meeting new people, I began to implement everything that I learned. I started taking care of myself, I put myself first, and I even started to put up stronger boundaries.

I started saying yes to myself and being an immovable mover. I now have so many of my colleagues (M/F) trying to get to know me better and asking me to coffee/lunch/dinner. Even their friends are trying to get to know me, too. They all love my "vibes" and always talk about how much they love working with me. Moreover, my bosses love my attitude and will do anything to keep me happy.

To have direct relevance to FDS, all the men I started seeing tell me that "I'm hard to read" but they love it! I figured that they had open schedules to go out but have since learned that they will move things around just to be with me. I don't ask for my water to be filled, they will take care of that for me! To top that all off, they remember even the tiniest details and accommodate for that, if I am uncomfortable they will find out why and fix it, and I don't have to bring out my wallet.

If you have the chance: If someone is not treating you right, leave. If you don't feel happy, try to find out the source of that unhappiness. If you know deep down that you deserve a better career, lifestyle, community, go seek it.

As for the point about career, lifestyle, and community, I improved my situation by writing down what I wanted, making goals, and achieving them. If I did not feel right about a specific part or I felt out of my element, I would refuse it. I set that boundary of not accepting anything less. With this, I also accepted that my peace is ultimately the most important thing to me. Therefore, being alone and resting in my peace was the best spot I could be in. I only let in people or things that do not hinder it and possibly amplify it.

We always preach on here that "If he wanted to he would." However, I also want to add "Go where you are celebrated, not where you're tolerated."

Oftentimes, the environment that you are in has an effect on you, too. I was able to recognize this with the help of FDS and now I can honestly say that I am living my best life.

Thank you so much ladies for all your contributions and efforts with this subreddit. It has made a difference in my life and I know many others' as well :)