There are a lot of posts about women wanting only the top 5-20% of men, backed by the good old OLD data that women don’t swipe right a lot on people etc.

I’m trying to figure out why my personal experience and of those of the men that I have in my personal or business circle is so vastly different. While I could attack the above statistic saying OLD data was misinterpreted or that it only applies to OLD and not irl, I want to take another angle.

Most people in my circle are not top 5%-20%, I would say most are around average. Almost everybody managed to find a woman to have a loving relationship with - even though it sometimes took some years. Are the women super models? No. Are they average looking and in love with their man? Yes. Do the man love their woman? Yes.

Women in my country dont care (much) about their mens finances. Sure they have to have some income, homeless isnt gonna cut it, but there are no overly high expectations. Most couples have approximately equal income in the relationship.

I’m from the Netherlands and we consider Americans quite materialistic. They care a lot about money and its quite a turn off for most of us to want to pursue money all the time. This was amongst others confirmed to me when I lived in US and women would want my number when I told them I was a lawyer, while in NL women say ‘sucks to be you, boring work eh?’ showing zero interest. There are not many people that desire the ‘luxury life style’ over a normal lifestyle.

I was wondering if reddit having predominately US members results in most things being said here being primarily applicable to US. Are there any members that have similar ‘hardcore’ hypergamy stories like women only wanting to date 6figs in EU?

If my personal experience is valid, what do you think about the thought that hypergamy is PARTLY a social construct and culture can have a big influence on the extent this phenomenon manifests?

If partially culturally influenced, how would US people change their culture if they had a magical wand to reduce hypergamy?