I wanted to make a post like this for some time. Disclaimer: This is just my experience with reddit and no other social media (altought im sure things like twitter apply) and NOT the outside world. I dont believe this happens outside that much.

Reasons:

The status discrimination

The most common insult right now is people saying that you are a virgin and live with your mother. This is only aimed towards men from what I see. This discriminates and villanizes all men that are unable to get laid due to a mental disorder, a physical problem, or other kind of problems. Which can be seen as ableism.

Shaming based on living with your mother or other family members is classism since affording another house is extremely expensive nowadays. And it also shames you for being of another culture. For example im latino so living with your family for a long time is common. My own father still lives with his mother due to having to take care of her and going through economical problems.

This also pressures men into having sex. It seems impossible to people that a man could not want to have sex and therefore he is "coping".

The body shaming

Men get body shamed relentlessly. Something that doesnt happen much to women on reddit. I have seen women get body shamed on reddit, but to a much lesser extent. Usually due to them being overweight.

Men dont only get shamed for that, but also for things like being bald, being short, small penis, femenine features, etc.

Bodyshaming a woman might get you called an incel or be told that "its natural", this doesnt happen when bodyshaming men.

I have heard women say that being hairy is natural so they shouldnt shave... well, being bald or short is also natural...

Many double standards on this.

The villanization and the incel word

This one is so common. I assume you guys know what Im talking about. Internet became a ground to hunt bigots and get some "im a hero" points. People seem to want to insult others and be an asshole, but they want to do that towards someone that they think deserves it.

Nobody wants to be an asshole towards a crippled person. But towards a racist? Its open ground. The problem with this is that these people cant find enough racist people, so they take what you say out of context or interpret it however they want and then assume you are bigoted so they can say your dick is small.

This is done a lot on reddit, in particular by calling you an incel. I have been called incel like.. 6 or more times I think? And none made any sense. Reasons I have been called an incel that I remember:

  • Being asexual. So people dont believe a man can be asexual and im just a coping incel.
  • Saying we should virgin shame others (I have pics as proof).
  • Saying that looks matter to some extent. (The people that dont believe me proceed to bodyshame).
  • Saying that we should treat everyone equally (I have pics as proof).
  • Saying that you can be called an incel without being misogynist.
  • Having a templar pfp (I just like the meme).
  • Being lonely due to mental illness.

I dont remember more, but you can see my point. If you want, browse through all my comments and you will never find misogyny or incel slangs. I rarely insult people at all. I might call someone an idiot from time to time. But I usually try to be respectful towards everyone.

So people just call you an incel so they can bodyshame you, shame you by status or something.

Villanization is extremely common towards all genders I would say, but especially towards men. Just go and read a man complain about literally anything that is not getting raped and people will blame him.

I have browsed subs like r/TrueOffMyChest and many controversial (in the searching sense, not that they were really controversial) were men venting about being lonely. And the comments of course blaming the man. Which leads to my next point.

Its always men fault

Men always get the blame when something happens. I can make some examples.

  • If you are lonely, its your fault, no matter what.
  • Men are more likely to get killed, but its by other men so its your fault (even though you dont have the power to alterate the entire society).
  • If the woman is not pleased during sex, its your fault. If you are not pleased during sex, its your fault.
  • Relationships problems? Its mens fault.

This is ironically also misogynist because it implies that women are helpless and cant do things by themselves.

The disdain towards masculinity

It seems that its bad for some people to be masculine. I dont have much information on this, but trans men have complained about being othered due to now becoming masculine by some lgbt members.

Transphobia

This one might sound weird, but reddit is filled with transphobia, especially against trans women. I fully believe trans women are women. But what Im trying to say is that the misandry is so high, that many people see trans women as men with a fetish or a porn addiction. Those people being mostly in the right, but there are also TERFs.

The left and the right against mentally ill men

After browsing for some time, I have concluded. Some leftists hate me due to being a virgin, not interested in sex or "sodomizing femboys" (tf). It seems like its shameful nowadays to be prude or straight. I dont understand why sexualizing women is wrong but sexualizing femboys is fine...

Most on the right hate me due to also being a virgin, and due to not being an "alpha male" or something.

Both sides seem to care too much about appearance. It seems like some leftists want you to be sexy so they can masturbate with you. And some on the right want you to look like an alpha so they can make you their leader.

Of course, being mentally ill makes being any of those difficult.

People are simply more aggresive towards white men

I have seen someone being called an incel and when they said they were a woman they retracted. I also see people defending black people to the death. It makes no sense, people should care about the character, intentions, their values. Not their race or gender.

I get accused of being white when Im latino. It seems like everytime a man speaks on internet people imagine them as a fat, white, male incel or something.

Men cannot complain

No need to elaborate much. People hate when you complain and blame you.

Shame on hobbies

I always hear women saying that they cant do anything without being shamed, but I never see that. Its men who get shamed due to their hobbies.

Dont believe me? Use an anime pfp and say something against the norm. And you will see.

Its ridiculous because I have seen so many women like anime and even some told me they watch hentai. But apparently if a man does so he is an incel.

It seems that if you, as a man, do anything that is not a sport. You are a virgin.

How to solve this?

You dont. Just remember that the people that speak on the internet are like 1%. Sure, it hurts when a tweet that has 120K likes saying that all short men should get aborted. But it doesnt matter, you cant fight the people on the internet, they will never agree with you. Just remember that people outside are usually better.

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I would like to study this deeply but I dont know how. And I kind of think its a waste of time.