Divorced at 32 - red flag?

Hereforthatandthis · 2023-07-20T00:53:16+00:00

No dude. It’s 2023. Divorce is not taboo anymore. Over 50% of married couples will go through a divorce. Go to therapy to work on why you felt comfortable enough in cutting everyone from your life just because you were in a relationship. Don’t go looking for partnership if you don’t have the tools to be a partner yet.

Wolfjak · 2023-07-20T05:57:57+00:00

For me, whose wife cheated, and I came out of that marriage like I was shot out of a cannon. I became so much more myself. So free and clear. If anybody thinks that’s a red flag, they’re not worth my time.

You’re going to crush it out there.

Men age like wine.

Men age like wine my friend. Focus on you and only allow girls that are worth your time in to your life.

Women age like milk, don’t pick the sour ones.

Reflog1791 · 2023-07-20T01:09:44+00:00

Try golf. Same with you, my old friends moved on after I avoided them to placate my ex.

Golf allows you to make a new pal every time you go out there. I picked up the game and joined a men’s club (the much cheaper alternative to joining a private country club) when my marriage ended. It’s been nothing short of amazing. I have 50 golf buddies that I look forward to seeing every Saturday. 10 of them are great friends. Some are in their 70s and some are in their 30s. We yuck it up and laugh our asses off for 4+ hours.

I played with this nice guy who was kind of shy. I asked him if he’s made many friends in the club. He said, “not really but my team won that tournament a few weeks back.”

I told him “well you made a friend today” and I meant it. The look on his face was more fulfilling than a hot date.

Antique_Librarian_96 · 2023-07-20T01:38:39+00:00

I’m in the same boat man. I am going to have to start over with family and friends.

heartless_monk · 2023-07-20T06:41:19+00:00

you don’t have to share that you’re divorced with people, just share that you are “single”.

there no crime in exposing it later if asked, should you become seriously involved with someone.

you’re overthink this.

AlmostThere22 · 2023-07-20T01:46:35+00:00

Nah dude you're good.

33 here.

Reach out to your old buddies they'll be happier than hell to see and hear from you. Mine were. They'll greet you with open arms

You'll find dating is significantly easier than your 20s in every way possible. Women love men in their 30s. My dating range is 22 to 38. Very hot women. I have a 16 year gap in my pool and there's a lot of hot women in that dating gap. I get 50 matches a week on bumble and I live in a rural area.

You're all good man. The next 10 years of your life are gonna be kickass. You'll make more money. You'll bang beautiful women. You'll have freedom at the best possible time. 30s are kickass for a man.

FlyHighAlways · 2023-07-20T03:44:29+00:00

Well if you have great friends, definitely reach out to them. Good luck!! I’m going through the same boat at 33. I thought i was in a marriage full of love. Apparently i was just a pawn to play with, as per the wishes and mood of the mistress. Guess these days its ok to just abuse your husband, his family, threaten to divorce him just so you can make him agree to whatever you are saying and call it that you were just asking for attention and love. Or maybe i am just a wrong person myself for everyone as when i asked for help (for the first time in my life) from my friends, I realised i am nowhere close to being important than their next hot fling. Guess its just time to “man up” myself.

Scary_Board_8766 · 2023-07-20T09:25:09+00:00

No most adults have been divorced . I can relate I'm at 15 years of marriage and getting divorced and I gave up everything for her and now I'm alone and she doesn't want to move but I won't be able to afford to live here. So now I'll probably have to move out of state away from my kids. Or I go live with my parents which I tried initially and was really bad for my mental health.

_RustyOnion_ · 2023-07-20T10:16:05+00:00

I'm in a similar situation divorced at 35 and married for 6 years together for 8.

Don't jump into dating quick. Take your time to rebuild your relationships and work on your self. Your status as far as dating is concerned will only improve.

Dadsurvivor317 · 2023-07-21T00:38:53+00:00

33 here and blindsided as well just recently. Women are fuked up. Hopping on this journey with you my brother

oxFubar7 · 2023-07-21T11:58:16+00:00

28 now divorced at 27 after being together for 7 years.

I took a full year to just work on myself physically/mentally/etc before putting myself back out there and thought the same thing about dating and being seen as a red flag.

Can honestly say I haven’t gotten any pushback in dating so I personally wouldn’t worry too much about it in your situation.

upvotersfortruth · 2023-07-20T09:41:43+00:00

Divorce in and of itself isn't a red flag. But a dude who goes on an on about it on a first date is. Also a guy who says, "we still have love for each other" true or not will raise some red flags. What they want to know is that she's gone for good with no ongoing relationship (except if kids) and that the reason she's gone isn't because you're a psycho abuser.

And practice how you're going to pitch it. Something generic that isn't a lie because if you get into a serious relationship the probing will start at some point and you don't want that hack the foundation of trust out of that new relationship.

"We were together for eight years and figured getting married was the right thing to do, as it turns out we were both wrong and decided to go our separate ways while we both still had a chance to find the right person. [and if you play your cards right, baby, it might just be you (wink) (point)]"

wisstinks4 · 2023-07-20T05:24:38+00:00

Get smashing

Mountain_Collar_7620 · 2023-07-20T07:43:29+00:00

Ya , they Isolate you … before they “bin you” . Odd but common. Never letting anyone isolate me again .

SagittariusQueen8 · 2023-07-20T15:43:19+00:00

Not a red flag at all on you. Sounds like you were possibly dealing with a Narcissist. I’m sorry for what you have endured but coming from a female I wouldn’t consider that a red flag. I hope this helps.

ArtichokeSavings9472 · 2023-07-20T17:42:27+00:00

You will do fine I’m in the middle of thst too the good friends will get it and those who don’t .. we’ll don’t belong in your life . Get into a gym it’s the best lift heavy things up sweat get some gym bro friends and talk about all the girls we see running around . these male relationships are important very important they make you a better man and husband b/f etc because you can let loose be a dude feel normal talk some crap no woman on this plant can provide 100% of your needs . You will come home (whether single or with a woman) refreshed and feeling masculine as you should ! Don’t ever let another woman drag you away from this hang in there you will make some great friends out there and come back here for more support !

anon97t01 · 2023-07-21T04:25:30+00:00

35 here and divorce was finalized last week. I am enjoying life so much more after leaving her but the thought of dating again has got me stressed out. We were high school sweethearts, married about 7 years ago but I separated from her about 2 1/2 years ago when I was tired of her being a violent alcoholic. I wish that would have happened before we got married.

Title	Divorced at 32 - red flag?
Author	Hour-Regret9531
Upvotes	14
Comments	32
Date	July 20, 2023 12:32 AM UTC (3 years ago)
Subreddit	Posted in /r/Divorce_Men
Original Link	https://old.reddit.com/r/Divorce_Men/comments/154bwxy/divorced_at_32_red_flag/
Archive Link	https://theredarchive.com/r/Divorce_Men/divorced-at-32-red-flag.1225855 https://theredarchive.com/post/1225855

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