People are surprised when I say I get no girls

Fidel__CashFl0w · 2025-11-10T00:51:31+00:00

Surprisingly a lot of guys are in the same boat as you. I was, people assumed since I was tall and had curly hair that i was drowning in it but I was not lol until I actually started talking to women. Take it as a compliment but also try to get out there and talk to women or use this to at least calm your nerves about approaching women that you’re going to be successful with them

3141592652 · 2025-11-10T00:44:51+00:00

You don't have to lie but don't tell em straight up you getting nothing. Even the hint a girl knows you get some will will make them interested.

xionone · 2025-11-10T03:35:40+00:00

Welcome to the club, been the story of my life. I know I’m not hideous just based on the fact I’ve been through way too many situations with girls doing/saying things around me. Just take it as you’re passing the looks test consistently, now you gotta get the game and confidence.

xwxcda · 2025-11-10T02:11:15+00:00

Lie about your body count, woman hate virgins.

Roxkis · 2025-11-10T02:24:29+00:00

I'm actually the same. Lots of people seem to think I look decent, and I do get attention, but my social skills are novice at best.

Even after going to the gym, I don't really have the energy to be more social.

It sounds like op is in college. I'm a bit older then college age, so I don't get too many people commenting on it anymore.

CumDeliveryGuy · 2025-11-10T00:10:15+00:00

People are also deceptively nice because it's less uncomfortable than telling the truth.

becomesharp · 2025-11-10T02:22:10+00:00

Super common if you are: Tall + decent looking + shy or bad social skills

Vox_Dissidens · 2025-11-10T03:04:28+00:00

When I met my first long-term girlfriend, her friends warned her to watch out because I had a reputation for sleeping around. My body count at the time was only five, and I had never cheated on anyone, but they were so certain that I had and would.

Take it as a compliment, I guess - you give off the vibe that you’re good with women. Not a bad place to start from when you’re learning seduction.

financeben · 2025-11-10T03:43:35+00:00

2025 is normal

Altruistic-Patient-8 · 2025-11-10T05:03:04+00:00

I consider myself basic as hell, but people assume I have consistent sex. Like no dude, I'm basically a virgin, only had sex once. Maybe because sex is so normal to other people, they just assume everyone experiences it. The climate we're in now suggests otherwise

Few_Competition_1989 · 2025-11-10T09:08:09+00:00

Well first of all don't take girls opinion on this, they have no idea what goes into being successful with women for a guy lol. They see that you're average nice + average good looking (ie not a weirdo) and they will say things like that for fun.

You're kinda overthinking this also, which makes me think you're probably under 25? Eventually you will figure out that whatever girls say is irrelevant because it's most of the time just a reflection of what they feel inside in the moment, not a reflection of reality.

If you want to get good at this you're gonna have to do like everyone else : learn to approach women and learn social skills.

It's not the easiest that's for sure but it's totally doable and if you want to get girls there is no other way.

autodidacticasaurus · 2025-11-10T09:23:46+00:00

Like the other day my roommates girlfriend was over and they went into my room and she said “is this where you take all your girls” I told her I’ve never had a girl over and she was suprised.

She was flirting with you. It was stupid of you to admit that. You should have flirted back and said something silly like "I don't know, maybe you should find out."

Another time we were playing a drinking game and a girl had to guess my body count and she said 10 when it’s only 1 and she was suprised n it was kinda awkward.

This was also a girl flirting with you. She was saying she's attracted to you. You're a fucking moron, my friend. 😂

Next time a girl tells you this shit, stop saying how you don't get laid and flirt back instead.

treycomeknockshiioff · 2025-11-10T02:00:05+00:00

my mom was shocked when I told her the last time I dated a girl was literally 2 years ago 😂 I have the same issue tho I don't really know how to approach a girl, the girl I was dating really came up on me first.

nintendoborn1 · 2025-11-10T00:17:02+00:00

Literally the same. Cause I’m tall. And supposedly good looking. Still stuck here

Bigballerway93 · 2025-11-10T01:57:46+00:00

I have had this problem for a long time. Slowly getting better over time but I also never feel like I could get a woman when I want to so idk

ImGucciYouPolo5 · 2025-11-10T06:27:35+00:00

Same in my case I just don’t have the time for girls… mostly working all the time and trying to build a career where I can make decent money

i-like-dutch-cheese · 2025-11-10T00:24:31+00:00

Ehhh, I'd probably be in the same boat if it weren't for dating apps.

MadLad0333 · 2025-11-10T03:12:58+00:00

Same! Almost finished college with 0 serious relationships or 0 bodies. When I meet-up with my high school buddies, they find it hard to believe that I got no girls

fortunate_numbnut · 2025-11-10T18:18:13+00:00

I’m literally a virgin at 22 (almost 23) and same

ProverbialPredator · 2025-11-11T15:20:10+00:00

Same. When I was in Uni, my friends would point out girls who were staring at me.

But I was the shyest, lowest esteem mf alive and I never believed it.

Two years ago, I fumbled a baddie who assumed the same thing about me.

My advice; lean into it.

Don’t correct people. Instead don’t confirm or deny. Play it cool.

For me, the results have been staggering. Although now, there’s more important things to focus on.

Mundane-Worry-1739 · 2025-11-10T02:19:12+00:00

Show your pics

Cavsfan724 · 2025-11-10T02:21:43+00:00

I can relate

WebNew9978 · 2025-11-10T06:34:35+00:00

Lucky. People aren’t surprised with me. One look at me and they can already tell. I wish people assumed that about me.

shansonly · 2025-11-10T15:09:11+00:00

Same when I was in college. Had people tell me I must get a lot of attention from ladies or that I look like a player. Couldn’t have been further from the truth lol…

Mainly attributed to social skills, lack of life experiences, and worried about how others think of me.

I’m certainly no pro, but I’ve addressed those factors - now in a serious LT relationship and could probably do decently well if I were to chase women.

Joy_Boy_12 · 2025-11-10T17:02:00+00:00

What is low body count?

Chrome_Quixote · 2025-11-11T05:26:43+00:00

Girls giving you compliments like this is good. They are in the category of people you want to sell to / be with so they’re confirming others would be interested, focus on that instead of your lack of action thus far. Specifically in the scenarios you mention, do a “yes, and” relevant to the situation. Be in the present and say whatever comes to mind that you find funny.

Try dating apps, get good photos and be diligent about setting up dates quickly. Don’t chit chat on the apps. You need to practice the skills of dates. Get after it bro!

Ebomb31 · 2025-11-11T16:24:27+00:00

Yeah. I'm 6'2" with a slender athletic build, been described as "tall, dark, and handsome, " and I've done some modeling before. My voice is a deep baritone bordering on bass. I've had girls lean on my chest and say, "Talk to me, I don't care what you say, I just want to feel the vibrations."

All my life, I've been friend zoned a TON.

Often, I'll see women express a strong initial interest, and then it fizzles quickly. Some of said friends have said or implied it's because they think I'm not interested or they don't have a chance. I also see the women I've been friends with tend to go for guys who have more muscular builds and are more aggressive in their pursuits. More traditionally masculine types.

I once signed up for a discovery call with a dating coach, and when I picked up the phone, he had a moment of stunned disbelief. I'd completed the intake form, and he had one idea, then he just kinda went quiet and said "dude you sound so different than I imagined. Your voice is like a pornstar or radio host!"

"Asian guy struggling with friend zone" doesn't exactly scream a tall, deep voiced model.

I've had multiple times in my life where I was essentially a version of "the gay friend" to a handful of women, and people around me thought that I was banging them all because I'm straight.

Then people thought I was asexual and got really confused when they figured out I was banging all of 0 of them.

Then later, those women said they were DTF and figured I wasn't because I wasn't trying.

My issues were: I was suppressing my sexuality and my sexual magnetism as a result.

I was super stringent on the social circumstances. I didn't want to make moves on someone who was talking to someone else, and women would tell me about their dating woes and I would try to help them and give them advice rather than see it as an opportunity to step in and "fill the gap" which is what there was a subtle invitation towards. I hate that shit and though I recognize it now, I still generally refuse to do it because I'm stubborn.

I'm demi sexual. Sort of.

While I can feel chemistry and attraction fairly easily, trust, connection, and attachment are all important to me, and those take time. One night stands have generally left me feeling dissatisfied and empty. I would rather take my time connecting with people and genuinely find the idea of sleeping with someone I can't have a deep conversation with to be offensive and unsettling. If I can have a deep connective conversation, then I might even be down to have a ONS or do something noncommittal.

I'm in my mid 30's now and have a body count in the mid 20's, but if I wasn't like this, it would've easily been in the 100s.

My buddy, who is a little shorter but more fit, handsome, and charismatic than me, is a complete natural, and his count is 100+

He has the whole "life is an adventure" and falls in love both easily and deeply but is always flitting about and moving on. Moving cities, states, jobs, etc. He goes for things, and they burn like a roaring flame, but then it dies down to coals, and life transitions follow.

I'm averse to that kind of lifestyle. Nowadays, I focus on work and building and tending my communities quietly in the background. All the stuff I learned from pickup and the seduction community about body language, sales, social dynamics, etc. now just helps me take care of my friends and people.

I dress normally, even a bit raggedy. My girlfriend likes that I don't come across as super attractive and fly under the radar, but she gets to enjoy what's underneath and calls me a "hidden gem"

She basically compared me to the male equivalent of the hot girl who wears hoodies and sweats and not much makeup.

It's peaceful in a way that I've never found from chasing "shiny object syndrome" in the dating world. I really hate that shit. I'm kind of autistic TBH and navigating it has always felt shallow and draining.

CTWaythenthen · 2025-11-12T17:09:51+00:00

People are surprised when I say I get no girls

They're not surprised. You're just being awkward, bud.

If a girl is asking "is this where you take all your girls?" then you say "only the ones I want". If a girl guesses your body could is 10, then you say "I don't want to brag, but I will say it's an exclusive club."

It's a game, dude. Play it. If you're good looking but come across as awkward, then girls are going to pick up on it faster than autistic kid finds a hobby at a model train convention. Girls are incredibly intuitive.

Charming-Cell-3595 · 2025-11-14T02:42:27+00:00

Hey bro. Your problem is that you admit that you dont get girls. You probably unknowingly admit alot of things that a negative and turns girls off. Never admit something negative like you don’t get girls or that you haven’t had sex in a while that you got rejected by a girl or something like that. You’re better off just saying maybe and just brushing it off rather than admitting you are bad at something. also you’re probably really good looking and you’re smooth in platonic conversation but you’re afraid of talking man to woman with girls and that can be fixed you just gotta keep trying you gotta go out there and you gotta just keep talking to girls as soon as you get that one semi-attractive girl to hook up with you, you’ll have confidence. Build off that and do it again and again. You’ll realize how your life has changed and how many girls you have. I used to be in the same boat. Primarily you’re probably not getting out cause you’re not putting yourself out there. You’re probably just swiping on the apps but need to go everywhere you need to talk to girls. You need to get more rejected all the time. I just keep trying as soon as you keep trying you fell enough. You’ll just keep getting better and that’s how you’ll get girls

ArmitageShanks69 · 2025-11-15T17:55:26+00:00

Nope, the opposite. People would be surprised if I managed to get just one date.

Title	People are surprised when I say I get no girls
Author	AdministrationClear1
Upvotes	185
Comments	77
Date	November 10, 2025 12:03 AM UTC (8 months ago)
Subreddit	Posted in /r/seduction
Original Link	https://old.reddit.com/r/seduction/comments/1osz1ua/people_are_surprised_when_i_say_i_get_no_girls/
Archive Link	https://theredarchive.com/r/seduction/people-are-surprised-when-i-say-i-get-no-girls.1566118 https://theredarchive.com/post/1566118

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