A lot of red pill posters seem to think "blue pill" advice set them up to fail. This usually includes "be yourself" "be nice/friendly" "don't hide your feelings" "don't change for someone else" "looks aren't important" etc

All of this is fine advice if approached rationally.

Be yourself: be you but don't exactly bring up your undesirable qualities without being asked. Let the crazy out slow.

Example: my wife asked what I was passionate about when we first met I told her the Green Bay Packers which is true. She said she didn't know much about football but would be willing to watch with me. I didn't tell her their collapse in 2004 on 4&26 in the NFC divisional round had kept me up at night at the time. I care/cared too much but because I have a filter and am able to discern between things to promote and things to avoid I kept that to myself.

Fast forward, she's very into the packers as well, we both go to games together, she watches without me if I'm at work or otherwise occupied and her day is just as ruined as mine If they fuck up.

So essentially be yourself but don't go on about how you've got three felony bench warrants, that you spent time in a mental institution, that you once joined a cult and engaged in ritualistic human sacrifice; save that for a later date.

Be nice/friendly: don't be just nice. Be yourself and be kind. Talking about how pretty/sweet/interesting she is all the time sounds boring and desperate. Be funny, be interesting, just don't be rude is all that advice is saying.

Example: I was always kind but it was a feature not the product. It was mostly my humor that my wife found endearing, I was never rude or indifferent to her feelings and that's all be nice means.

No human wants to feel unimportant or that their feelings aren't relevant that's all be nice means. It's not all about being nice it's just "be nice" in addition to whatever you were going to do.

Don't hide your feelings: this goes back to the be yourself but, obviously if you're looking for a LTR/marriage hiding pieces of you is generally a recipe for disaster. Now that doesn't mean you tell your potential partner that you cry yourself to sleep on your first date but it also doesn't mean that 6 months in you can't share that you once struggled with depression or get really upset when you read an article about animal abuse or whatever. Have a filter and use rational judgement. If you sometimes think about driving into oncoming traffic maybe keep that to yourself but if you're having a bad day or your boss treated you like a moron and it has you upset you should be able to share that and if you can't you should probably run and not look back.

Don't change for someone else/looks aren't important: if you're changing it should be for you. Obviously if you have massive personality flaws you should probably change but don't do it to gain someone else's approval do it to be happy with yourself. Don't not be a slob to get laid, stop being a slob because it's detrimental to your own existence. Looks are important but they're not the be all and end all. A good personality and confidence can help you achieve relational satisfaction. You can improve by training or what have you but do it for you. If you're insecure in your appearance everyone else knows that and that's a turn off, if you're confident people can look passed physical appearance.

Why is any of the above advice controversial or hard to understand?