You see it all the time on here; date multiple men at once until they are properly vetted so that you will not get too attached to a LVM and ignore red flags.

I did just that but I still screwed up, so be sure to take my tale to heart and learn from it.

Late last year I broke up with my abusive LVX and earlier this year I got back into the dating pool.

A is a working military man, good looking and obviously in very good shape. We share a lot in common and our dates were always fun and very casual. His personality and I meshed really well together as we are both very aggressive as I like to say it.

B is also a working man with an IT company. Average looking but I am serious when I say I value personality over looks, and again he had a great personality. Our dates were just as fun, he was a thinker and he always stimulated my enjoyment in deep discussions about philosophy and politics without ever criticizing my opinions and instead prodding to see how I tick.

C is a student studying pharmaceuticals, also very attractive but more in a cute, geeky way. I was actually pretty surprised when he asked me out as he is rather quiet and I thought my loud personality wouldn’t interest him. However I found the pace to be very refreshing as he would always listen to what I had to say and was always so interested and I never got interrupted.

Of course there is always a catch: spoiler alert these are all LVM.

I told every single one of them that I was looking for a serious relationship and that I want to be married. All three said they were looking for the same thing and so I continued dating them to vet them before committing to a real relationship. This went on for a little over two months. I decided A was very enjoyable to talk to and hang out with one one one but as soon as it came to a group setting he was unbearable. He was aggressive, loud, trying to be the alpha of the room and it was exhausting. B began to open up about his recent ex and the beloved line of “my ex was crazy” escaped his lips. Big red flag. C on the other hand, I had very little issues with. He seemed very serious and even when he asked the first time if we wanted to be exclusive and I said no he said he understood and that it was no rush.

I thought I had vetted him proper and after those couple of months I decided that while I enjoyed A and B that they had a few things I just couldn’t get behind, so I made a what I thought was a good decision with C and soon after we went exclusive. Soon after getting him to commit to plans turned into a chore. I should have tossed him aside after I noticed a pattern but I think my brain wasn’t ready to give up after and I fell back into my old ways. However after THREE WEEKS of not a single date I laid my foot down.

His reason? “I can’t give you what you need but I still love you...”

This man who asked me out, told me he was looking for a serious relationship, and asked me twice if we would go exclusive was now ready to dip out after several months. He had all that time to bail but it wasn’t until I told him I’m not going to chase him to spend time with me that he had the balls to say he wasn’t ready for a relationship. Probably hoping he wouldn’t hafta put in effort now that I was labelled as “girlfriend”.

Regardless I dumped him and haven’t messaged him at all. I’m not wasting my time on this scrote. If I had started dating him exclusively when he had originally asked this would be a lot more painful as I would have been far more attached and would have probably tried to come to terms with only being given attention once a month. I STAND BY EVERY SINGLE PIECE OF ADVICE THAT SAYS TO DATE MULTIPLE MEN AT ONCE. Push for what you need and if they don’t give it don’t waste your time. He was hoping I’d bend so he could keep doing whatever he wished and only come to me when he needed attention and affection by guilting me with the I love you card. YOUR STANDARDS ARENT RIDICULOUS