She’s sixteen...

classic_falafel · 2021-01-18T10:13:03+00:00

his psychiatrists = his one friend who studied one semester psychology

Fuckdoesithurt956 · 2021-01-18T13:54:56+00:00

🤡📢 DEVELOPING KINKS DUE TO TRAUMA IS A PERFECTLY FINE AND A HEALTHY WAY TO COPE

Here is a classic 16yo parroting what she heard off the internet without giving it any actual critical thought.

It has been acknowledged that some victims of sexual abuse will become hypersexual and engage in violent roleplay. Some of the reasons given are to take control back, override the bad memory etc... but that doesn't mean it works. It's not a treatment. It's a distraction. DDLG will not help them deal with childhood abuse, it distracts them by giving them someone else to fixate on - and this someone is usually attracted to their insecurities, plays on them and has no intention on helping them recover. Similarily, just because they're hypersexual now, it doesn't mean they're dealing with the assault that drove them to it, more like they're just trying to drown it out - which is exactly what I did.

Say you were in a car crash, no one would encourage you to keep crashing your car to deal with the trauma.

oi_oi_oink · 2021-01-18T08:20:05+00:00

So, dealing with your traumas by indulging in unhealthy sexual practices is a healthy coping mechanism? Then dealing with your failures through alcohol and drugs must also be healthy.

rightascensi0n · 2021-01-18T09:32:02+00:00

I like how their so called “experts” conveniently forgot about hypersexuality as a hallmark of trauma, especially sexual abuse /s 🤨

babysoymilk · 2021-01-18T17:39:31+00:00

This is so concerning. I wouldn't be surprised if she's already being groomed. For context, I am a survivor of sexual assault and rape. I remember being 17 and following BDSM Tumblr accounts. At the time, I was being groomed by a much older man and thought it was a Dominant/submissive relationship. I was also surrounded by "sex positive" feminist content and would have agreed with the pro kink argument in a heartbeat. It took me years to connect the dots between being "kinky" and my trauma.

weekend111 · 2021-01-18T11:16:34+00:00

You can find a quack psychiatrist willing to justify anything.

dollymyfolly · 2021-01-18T14:39:08+00:00

“With a trusted person” wtf does this phrase even mean anymore when women aren’t even vetting anymore? The bar is so fucking low

honeybeeroll · 2021-01-18T15:06:13+00:00

This is fucking scary, the fact that this garbage is all over social media, poisoning children's minds makes me sick. It's like kids these days are being raised by social media.

It's scary that parents seem to have no idea what their kids are engaging w/ online. I think older parents don't even know what's out there and gen x and millennial parents haven't realized how much the internet had changed for the worse over the years. Any other millennials here remember all the TV specials and shit about how to protect your kids from perverts on the internet? I haven't seen a show like that advertised in like 15 years. No one seems worried about it even thought kids are being groomed worse than ever.

This is why you need to have a very strong morality at home counter to all this shit. Everyday I see more and more why my friend will be homeschooling her kids when they're old enough, and why they won't have unsupervised internet access until they're much older. It's honestly the only way to prevent kids' brains from being warped by this ~sex positive~ propaganda.

I've been thinking about becoming a big sister to provide a counter to the sex positive bullshit I know every teen girl is seeing on social media... I got lucky that my parents were always very engaged with me. Not every girl is that fortunate and maybe I could help. (if anyone has had experience being a big sister btw I'd love to hear about it!)

RegularStatus5 · 2021-01-18T08:16:59+00:00

Holy fuck, that guy wouldn't leave it the fuck alone. He was in your story harassing you. And for what? Did he expect you to say that he is right, you changed your mind on something you feel strongly about, you will be happy to have BDSM sex with him? Idiot. Block him everywhere sis, he is arguing in bad faith and wasting your time.

sikedyke · 2021-01-18T08:40:03+00:00

I just want them to question what type of guys are willing to help out in their sexy therapy. No nice man would put you in that situation.

I’ve always wondered about these pornos how the money works. Does production crew get a cut? What about the male co-star? How many people are profiting off of exploiting your trauma?

misszazie · 2021-01-18T14:12:09+00:00

Power imbalances are not kinks. We need more people to understand the difference.

Kinks are ok, they're just unconventional things people enjoy. It could be a certain position, or dirty talk, or erroneous areas that not everyone has.

If I enjoy being lightly restrained, and I ask for it, I have the power. I consented, I can free myself, my partner is complying with me. This is not the same thing as being tied up and having to go along with it unless I pop a safe word.

People who get off on either giving up power or having all the power should not be having sex, but be in therapy bc something wrong with them is being expressed in the bedroom. Telling them to normalize trauma by reenforcing it through sex is fucking insane.

Healthy sex is a mutually pleasurable experience of two equals. BDSM ruins that.

Equal-Ear2312 · 2021-01-18T14:10:08+00:00

developing kinks in response to trauma is totally fine...

say what?!!?!>!>!>!

say what!?!??!?!??!

just-peepin-at-u · 2021-01-18T17:02:56+00:00

Pesky females with their healthy boundaries! Cannot let a young girl form a healthy and respectful view of herself and sexuality, that might spread to other women her age and interfere with his ability to abuse them for his own gratification.

He is way too interested in making sure she doesn’t have a boundary. He is super upset about her having a reasonable expectation of having her own body respected.

Salt_Satisfaction · 2021-01-19T01:54:44+00:00

Every time I tell my mother the kind of abuse that young people think is cool and kinky, she asks me why girls nowadays are so naïve. I know it sounds victim-blaming but she's actually baffled at how harmful the collective lowering of standards has been.

This is the reason. You find psychologists stating their opinions and not based on research, or conveniently choosing one study with surveys using self-assessment to prove how BDSM is so much cooler and "healthy" than normal sex. The mainstream media has replaced any concept of self-respect and dignity with "anything goes" as long as supposedly both consent.

Oh the man views her as extremely inferior, to the point that he could care less if she lives or dies, and treats her badly? That should be totally irrelevant to her, in fact even if she knows this, she should ignore it because it's just sex or that's the point of having a humiliation kink. /s

You can't enjoy humiliating your partner and respecting them at the same time. It is not compatible.

cece188 · 2021-01-19T04:53:38+00:00

Honestly, why even try with these people? I would’ve blocked her at “it’s enjoyable.” We do not need to waste our energy trying to convince pickmeishas and LVM/NVM about the atrocities of kinks. I’m just sad about how young this girl is honestly. Such a shame.

Title	She’s sixteen...
Author	dovecharm
Upvotes	162
Comments	33
Date	January 18, 2021 4:19 AM UTC (5 years ago)
Subreddit	Posted in /r/FemaleDatingStrategy
Original Link	https://old.reddit.com/r/FemaleDatingStrategy/comments/kzmy0p/shes_sixteen/
Archive Link	https://theredarchive.com/r/FemaleDatingStrategy/shes-sixteen.745202 https://theredarchive.com/post/745202

Comments