Time is limited. Time isn't infinite.

In the early days of the relationship time was spent growing the relationship and creating a bond.

Time was spent keeping that bond strong.

Then comes mortgage/car payments. Then comes longer work hours. Then comes kids.

Something must give.

Can't neglect work...that pays the bills.

Can't neglect kids ...kids need attention, kids need extra activities to socialize, kids have PTA meeting.

In other cultures families are big and everyone helps with the kids.

But over here it's two parents trying to balance everything.

Bye bye friends.

Bye bye hobbies.

Bye bye physical health.

Bye bye attraction to each other.

Bye bye marriage.

Is it just me or does it seem really hard to do marriage the proper way?

With a good house, two cars, kids in good schools who have after school activities, an active social life with friends you enjoy, fun hobbies , great physical health/fitness, a marriage were both partners are attracted to each other

all those things take a lot of time and energy to maintain.....seems easy to just end up neglecting something

Even worse you're both working jobs that don't pay 50k a year....like most people