Q4W: Would it bother you if

SmurfESmurferson · 2021-01-11T01:13:09+00:00

Who would marry that guy?

No, god no

nemporisso · 2021-01-11T01:07:39+00:00

He decides to stay with you and marry you

Where's my agency here? We aren't staying together if

He barely shows you any sexual or romantic attention

is the case. Marry me? In what world?

rosephase · 2021-01-11T01:14:12+00:00

It would literally never happen. A) I have effective birth control B) I would get an abortion C) I have no interest in getting married D) why would I stay in a relationship where the other person isn’t attracted to me? Only sad sacks make choices like that.

Atlas__B__Shruggin · 2021-01-11T01:21:01+00:00

(abortion is not an option here).

abortion is always an option. i would abort

He barely shows you any sexual or romantic attention

lol no

could you make this scenario stupider? how about "he calls you a big fat pig 14 times a day" and "he brings other women in the house to fuck them and they point and laugh at you"

sublimemongrel · 2021-01-11T01:40:29+00:00

Yes? What kind of dumbass q is this? Nobody says beta bux described as she isn’t sexually attracted to you and just in it for the reasources/support it is good for men or should be accepted. People argue with the definitions. There are dudes here that say or imply even treating a woman nicely or marrying her automatically means “beta bux”.

SaccharineX · 2021-01-11T04:07:05+00:00

Why yes hello dear women, would you like to be in a marriage with a Chad who doesn't give a shit about you? Would this bother you at all?

kwalden2 · 2021-01-11T01:10:22+00:00

There's a reason why I would never be put in that position. I'd never have sex in a pump-and-dump scenario. Never risk pregnancy by not using a condom (if pregnancy were an unwanted risk). I waited over 6 months with my now-husband, who was the only one. I got plenty of shit for being the inexperienced, prude girl. I got my feelings hurt plenty of times when I ended up lonely. Still didn't drop my standards. If you start dating a woman, and you can tell that her attraction isn't right, don't marry her. Just like I wouldn't sleep with OR marry a man who really didn't want me.

Because, yeah, that would bother me. But who takes responsibility for that? Me. And if I could take this comment and make all of PPD men shut up about female unaccountability, that would make me happy, but I would lose a source of entertainment.

Gilmoregirlin · 2021-01-11T02:38:45+00:00

See but he’s not my dream guy, or any woman’s dream guy because a woman’s dream guy treats her like she’s the sexist woman there is and gives her romantic attention and shares his resources with her. So that’s the flaw in your plan. You seem to think a woman’s dream guy is based solely on the fact that he’s a alpha male, but a 10/10 would never be a man that would treat me that way, so we would never get that far. As many women commented, I am on the pill would never rely on a condom, abortion is always an option, and even if it was not, I would rather be dirt poor and live on food stamps and raise the kid alone Then be married to such a man, but that would never happy because I am a well educated woman and make my own money.

crookedsummer2019 · 2021-01-11T01:48:48+00:00

Yes it would bother me. I would never put myself in that kind of situation though.

Would I show the same understanding to a man in a BB situation who feels the exact same way? Like how the woman feels? Well yes. Who the fuck wants to stay with someone who doesn’t love them nor is attracted to them. That would suck for anyone.

azngirl7689 · 2021-01-11T14:04:30+00:00

No, but best believe I’d be having affairs. A girl can only go without sex and affection so long. He wants to short me? Well guess who is cheating?

The funny thing is...men don’t dump women for affairs. They chase them harder. This guy would probably suddenly want to be close and affectionate if he found out.

PreparationWorried33 · 2021-01-11T01:02:40+00:00

It wouldn’t bother me. I’d just get a girlfriend.

_mwk · 2021-01-11T11:07:30+00:00

if we can have other babies and we can act like nice roommates to each other, then id be down with this hypothetical extremely unlikely scenario

SaBahRub · 2021-01-11T01:47:00+00:00

If that’s the only way you can equate a pump n dump, which is pretty common, well.....it’s not a convincing or plausible scenario

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rosyandthemachine · 2021-01-11T01:33:49+00:00

You had an alpha males (mean true 10/10 everything you ever want in a man) kid conceived in what he admittedly considered a pump and dump situation in which you let him take off the condom (abortion is not an option here). He decides to stay with you and marry you to raise the kid. You know that he has no real attraction to you other than he wanted easy sex that night but rather he just wants to be with you because the studies show that it is extremely beneficial for children to be raised with both parents.

all this is wrong. alphas don't use condoms, he wouldn't care if he knocked you up. you're never getting child support. he may just stop working and live with his gf, he clearly has attraction to you and he'll always hit you up for pussy. also he doesn't read books cuz he's masculine.

marrying a bitch you fucked once is beta bitch behavior.

2021-01-11T06:36:58+00:00

Couples who aren’t attracted to each other shouldn’t marry, ever. I thought the research said that kids raised by parents in loveless, resentful relationships aren’t having good relationship and secure attachment modeled.

Show me a guy who married out of obligation to the kid where there was no affection and I will show you a masochistic dumbass.

Mimoxs · 2021-01-11T06:52:27+00:00

Why would literally anyone NOT be bothered by this? What about this situation is even remotely positive? You're stuck with a kid and a person who doesn't love you?

This is like asking "would it bother you if you were to lose your job and become homeless?" Like yeah no shit there's literally nothing good out of that

thelajestic · 2021-01-11T07:33:32+00:00

I wouldn't be in that situation.

"Beta bucks" guys aren't in that situation either.

honeydewmelonz · 2021-01-11T08:47:52+00:00

I would get an abortion by any means necessary but I’ll answer the question the way you want: id rather stay single than marry someone that doesn’t love me/I don’t love. We’d coparent or I’d do the single mom thing since it isn’t as bad as people say it is.

madhunnybee · 2021-01-11T10:07:02+00:00

I wouldn't make the choices which would lead to the situation in the first place. What kind of idiot lets random people take their condom off and then refuses to have an abortion, after which she gets married to some guy who took off his condom during a one night stand and barely knows her?

Yes, it would bother me, which is why I won't work towards getting into that situation.

I do not show understanding because it's a series of bad decisions. For both of them.

Shirley_Schmidthoe · 2021-01-11T10:15:04+00:00

Being responsible for the life of another human being, especially a minor that most likely can't take care of itself would bother me.

Having said minor also live in my house would bother me.

On top of that having an adult live in that house would bother me.

Being married would bother me.

I see absolutely nothing desirable about this situation.

If so do you show this understanding to a man in a BB situation who also feels the exact same way?

What is a "BB situation"? I googled it and couldn't find it.

Asbelowsoaboveme · 2021-01-11T18:31:05+00:00

This would not bother me too much, I’d still get everything I want and basically win the game of life. Male attraction is meaningless and not validating, if he can get hard for me then he’s sufficiently attracted. If necessary I would seduce him or get hotter or just slip him some boner pills 😂 my blowjobs would make him love me eventually. Or else I’d open the relationship and have a boyfriend on the side who actually loves me. The problem would be the finances, is he willing to spend money on our child? Is he willing to buy us a house? Who pays for the groceries?

ApprehensiveWheel32 · 2021-01-11T20:01:51+00:00

I absolutely despise these half completed sentences as a title.

It’s the lowest form of clickbait ever conceived of.

octocombo · 2021-01-11T21:27:39+00:00

This is a really contrived situation that has no chance of happening to me for several reasons* but if it did happen, I would be frustrated short-term and would resolve it long-term with a simple conversation on whether he would prefer to have an open marriage or a divorce. And then I would follow through according to his preference. Once the situation was resolved in either of those directions, it wouldn’t bother me anymore.

I pity a man who’s in a situation where his partner just sees him as a cash dispenser. I can see why a man who is worried about losing more money and/or child custody in divorce would have more difficulty having the “divorce or open marriage” conversation than I would, but if you’re frustrated enough, it’s worth the risk. If you worry whether it’s possible for you to get a partner who wants you for yourself rather than your money (so the status quo of a loveless marriage might still be better than loneliness), that’s an additional layer of difficulty, and my pity is even greater.

*I don’t like “alpha” personalities, I use a condom AND hormonal birth control every time, I only fuck PiV with the primary partner I have now and only went for that after we had been together for over a year, abortion is an option and so is adoption, I wouldn’t marry this guy in the first place, and I struggle to imagine a guy in this day and age marrying someone he had no attraction to.

ReasonableSignature7 · 2021-01-11T22:57:12+00:00

Yes it would bother me! I wouldn't marry or partner someone like that. But respect to this hypothetical man for not walking out on his child, even if he lacks imagination as to how to raise a happy child

BlackPorcelainDoll · 2021-01-12T22:14:45+00:00

Children's well-being is contingent on the parents' well-being. Unwell parents that refuse to care for themselves cannot be good parents. This goes down into psychologically taxing mental stressors between the parents by default put stress on the child, causing harm. Your Q doesn't make much sense to me.

Zonkey_Zeedonk · 2021-01-13T03:22:32+00:00

I wouldn’t marry the guy.

I would co-parent and try to maintain a civil/solid non-romantic relationship for the sake of the child, but definitely not marry him.

I also wouldn’t get in this situation to begin with. If my birth control failed on a ons I’d abort. If I couldn’t abort I’d go the adoption route, but if for some reason I couldn’t do either, that would be my answer.

ariesv123 · 2021-01-16T17:43:33+00:00

It would very much bother you. An unhealthy marriage affects a child VERY heavily. Even if the parents don’t fight, they aren’t stupid. Children are very receptive to emotion

Gh0sttttttt · 2021-01-11T06:00:29+00:00

It wouldn't bother me.

I think its good to be a father and stick around. I dont believe in sharing finances in relationships (unless emergency) so I'm okay with separate bank accounts.

Tbh you halfway described my dream relationship.

Title	Q4W: Would it bother you if
Author	FreshRun2378
Upvotes	0
Comments	78
Date	January 11, 2021 12:53 AM UTC (5 years ago)
Subreddit	Posted in /r/PurplePillDebate
Original Link	https://old.reddit.com/r/PurplePillDebate/comments/kurgvy/q4w_would_it_bother_you_if/
Archive Link	https://theredarchive.com/r/PurplePillDebate/q4w-would-it-bother-you-if.737752 https://theredarchive.com/post/737752

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