Red Flag, Green Flag

kochIndustriesRussia · 2023-02-15T18:48:48+00:00

Buuuutt....doesn't the color of the flag depend on who you're trying to flag down? My (now) green flags were red a couple years ago. I just found someone who was into that stuff.....

Perfect-Resist5478 · 2023-02-15T19:58:08+00:00

What I consider my green flags I’m realizing a lot of guys on here would consider red.

Green: I don’t play games. I say what I mean and I mean what I say
Interpreted as red: I’m too direct and abrasive. I’m not coy or submissive enough
Green: I don’t expect anyone to know what I’m thinking unless I’ve told them directly. It’s not your job to be my mind reader
Interpreted as red: I’m not spontaneous and I don’t appreciate surprises
Green: I’m a doctor and I make good money. I don’t expect anyone to pay for anything I want to do
Interpreted as red: I don’t need no man and will never respect a man who doesn’t make as much as I do.
Green: I expect my man to be able to communicate effective with me. No name calling, no shutting down, no silent treatment. I think a partnership is a partnership. We don’t need to bring the same things to the table, but what needs to be brought needs to be complementary
Interpreted as red: I want to have my cake and eat it. I’m never satisfied and nothing my man does is ever good enough

januaryphilosopher · 2023-02-15T19:45:09+00:00

In terms of stereotypical red flags, I club and party a lot, I drink, I have lots of opposite-sex friends, I'm bi, I've had sex with only one person, I go on extended trips without a partner, I'm kinky, I have strong views on many topics, I prefer the gender role of the opposite sex, and I'm stubborn. For green flags, I've been able to live independently and cook and care for myself since I was eighteen, I'm compassionate and good with animals and children, I'm very protective and caring of those I love, I'm very affectionate and openly so and always reassure those closest to me that I love them, I'm a well-trusted confidante, I don't cause conflict or drana, I'm honest and loyal to a fault, and I'm very generous in terms of time, money and attention.

CruelAngelGradThesis · 2023-02-15T22:21:05+00:00

Red flag: I'm a virgin

Green flag: I'm a virgin

Safinated · 2023-02-15T19:05:51+00:00

I am self sufficient and mentally/physically healthy but average/not attractive, and will not make myself permanently attractive for a partner. Thus, I only have 2 criteria: be interested and don’t be repulsive

You can paint those whatever color you want

Birb-brained · 2023-02-15T19:26:51+00:00

Red flags - my work life balance is….eh. I’m an illustrator so Sometimes I’m working 12/14 hour days on big projects, sometimes I am working no hours at all. Makes life scheduling hard and also planning things like holidays and getaways in advance. I have a kid (would be a red flag by RP standards if I was single) Over 30 shock horror Career is important to me (that’s a green flag to me but I’m assuming we’re going by RP standards)

Green flags - empathetic, kind, considerate, thoughtful, intelligent, lots of hobbies like growing tropical plants, gaming, tabletop gaming, reading, going to the gym. I like dogs. Dogs are cool.

That’s all I can think of.

thisaccountaintrea1 · 2023-02-15T20:38:00+00:00

Red Flags: History of depression/anxiety, high n-count, bad with last minute changes to plans.

Green Flags: Prestigious and high-paying job, well-read in a variety of topics, highly social, good at taking criticism, quick to apologize when I mess up, love kids, empathetic and accepting towards others, always looking for ways to help, in pretty good shape.

Red or Green, depending on who you are: I'm very direct in my communication. I have a unique sense of humor; some love it, some really don't get it. I also have mostly female friends; some have told me this is a good thing, others have disagreed.

RocinanteCoffee · 2023-02-15T21:43:05+00:00

I don't consider dating to be a market and neither do the people I date.

As far as red flags, it's really subjective.

To a person who likes hand-holding and someone to respond to their texts every two hours I have red flags. To someone who prefers kissing and giving each other much more space, I have green flags.

To someone who wants to marry some day, my marriage-free nature is going to be a big red flag to them. To someone who doesn't want a government contract and children, my state is going to be a big ol green flag.

Embarrassed_Cup2524 · 2023-02-16T01:56:57+00:00

i dont put myself in a market. i am my own market

SeveralSadEvenings · 2023-02-15T18:42:49+00:00

red flag: I'm conceited, I have autism, I'm a post wall hag, and I'm a debate bro(ette).

green flag: everything else

ChadChasingB · 2023-02-15T19:20:04+00:00

Most of my flags could go either way depending on who you ask.

I am a virgin and staying that way until marriage.
l have extremely high behavioural expectations.
l don't ask for anything in a partner that l don't offer myself.
l can't have children, but I would love to adopt some one day.
I have daddy issues. You haven't met him, but trust me, he is an issue for any man that wants to date me. We have a great relationship and are very close.
I am very religious and live by the teachings of my faith. I expect my partner to do the same.
I don't care about your money and it will never impress me.

Red flag: I have cancer and it will most likely come back repeatedly, but not kill me. It's a form of blood cancer that is very manageable.

gymbro718nyc2 · 2023-02-15T19:32:25+00:00

I'm the whole package yo

LdeLolita · 2023-02-15T20:26:06+00:00

Red flags: Post-wall Divorced Have kids Have slept with more than two people

Green flags: Fit Attractive Make good money, zero debt Very kind and caring, generally consider myself to be a good person Emotional baggage has been worked out Consider personal improvement to be a lifelong goal

just_a_place · 2023-02-15T23:19:22+00:00

You need to specify what are your flags for? Because mine change wildly depending on what I'm looking for. When it comes to flings or casual sex I have almost no red flags. When it comes to commitment I have more flags than the UN. That being said.

For a serious relationship:

Red Flags: has kids, believes in woke BS, low intelligence, promiscuous, no situational awareness, flaky, irrational, masculine, gossipy, into drama, doesn't grasp the concept of boundaries, sneaky, lazy, disorganized, unclean, moody, argumentative, too much ego, Karen Complex, has a chip in her shoulder, been in jail, drinks or does any drugs, an addictive personality, petty,

Green Lights: Feminine, elegant, humble, short, thin, easily happy, smiles a lot, playful, curious, no patience for drama, intelligent, subtle, discreet, loyal, knows how to dress modest and attractive, high status, can sit in a room alone and be content, knows how to take care of herself, emotionally mature, is confident being vulnerable,

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saraimarsena · 2023-02-15T19:44:39+00:00

red flag: i have “daddy issues”, i shut down when I’m upset, I often believe the world revolves around me, I rarely talk to my parents, I don’t maintain friendships well, I don’t communicate my sexual needs very openly, I fall in love quickly

green flags: I’m relationship oriented, I’m pretty/cute, I’m a great listener, I love to go out of my way to show how much I care and I don’t hide it, I’m appreciative, I love giving head, I have a high sex drive, I’m nurturing, I’m open to trying new things, I’m intelligent, I’m big on reciprocation, I’m kind, I have a great sense of humor and laugh easily, I bring peace and comfort, I’m affectionate, I’m physically healthy

green/red: my n count is low

MiddleZealousideal89 · 2023-02-15T20:11:10+00:00

Hm, this is an interesting question. I think I have qualities that some people would be put off by, but they wouldn't be much of a problem for other people.

Red flags: I'm very direct and I can come off as rude, I have a lot of male friends, I like me some edibles, I can vanish from all social media for a week if I'm in an asocial mood and I will not check my messages during that time. I also have tattoos and short hair. While I don't think those are red flags, I've seen some people have opinions on that, so I'm adding them.

Green flags: I'm caring, I try to do my very best, I love animals, I'm open to trying out new things, I don't take crap from anyone.

kalashhhhhhhh · 2023-02-15T20:19:41+00:00

Red flags: I cry easily, I have one big insecurity, a bit of a control-freak regarding my schedule, messy, a bit of a snob

Green flags: Emphatetic, knowledgable, caring, good relationship with parents, a mediator/peacemaker, rational and introspective, funny (for a girl, I've been told), faithful in a relationship, love to cook

Sort the rest of these to your preference:

A large social circle and a lot of guy friends, love to party, drink and smoke weed in moderation, very focused on my studies and disciplined (but sometimes at the cost of having less time for boyfriend and friends), have a detailed career plan (+want to succeed in my career very much), egalitarian (50-50 in a relationship), want kids and marriage, N count 3, a gym bunny, love to debate, very good memory, atheist, "alternative/rock" music and clothing style, small titties and a big butt

I forgot a ton of stuff

tsukaimeLoL · 2023-02-15T20:34:06+00:00

Interesting to think about; I'll give it a shot.

Red flags: ADHD (?) won't be red for everyone, but it sure doesn't make my life easier in any way. I probably spend too much time on entertainment/otherwise unproductive stuff, though it doesn't get in the way of being reasonably successful at my work. Not very social overall, and I struggle a lot with talking about subjects I don't care about. Definitely have an issue with overthinking things leading to good and bad results.

Green flags: Always learning something new, very good at a large range of both helpful and entirely useless things. I speak several languages, and I'm always up to travel somewhere new. I'm loyal to a fault when it comes to those I love. In a relationship, I can be there as much or as little for you as you need me; if you want to spend all day on the couch watching movies, I'm here for it. If you need time for yourself, I'll keep myself busy and quiet and occasionally bring you food with no expectations of your time.

purplish_possum · 2023-02-15T21:09:18+00:00

Loves children often means she has children.

Quick to commit often means quick to divorce.

waffleznstuff30 · 2023-02-16T04:23:42+00:00

Red flags: Very sexual so my body count is higher, in my 30s, stubborn, not submissive at all, goth, I go out to goth clubs and bars, tattoos, colored hair, piercings (septum and others), liberal centrist, feminist, anxiety but like that paralysing kind which leads me to sort of just shutting down, if I work my physique enough I am proud to show it off. Don't really want children. Have guy friends. Busy like actual factual busy. An airhead at times.

Green flags I am very loyal, honest, understanding I typically don't make a big fuss over things, nerdy as hell, extroverted, really low maintenance as a person I don't sweat the small stuff, have a career pretty damn good at it, very independent, goofy and quirky, not fat, I take care of those around me, selfless, will come through for you, intelligent, loving. Don't trip on things like money.

mwb111300 · 2023-02-16T15:40:16+00:00

Red - addicted to weed, pretty introverted and shy, don’t get out much, dropped out of college to work a 9-5 at the age of 22, generally pretty isolated, not many friends, awkward no matter what but especially awkward around girls, still not really over ex despite being 4 years ago, ugly physique

Green - always calm and collected (weed lol), passionate and very proficient at my main hobby (music), great relationship with my family, invested when I’m in a relationship, not ‘nice’ but kind, idk how to put this last one without sounding bad but I’ve got plenty of money, I make a great wage on my own and I also come from an affluent family. Another one that I’m not sure how to phrase - I am pretty smart. Ik ik I’m a college dropout, but I don’t regret it and stand by that being the smart decision at the time. Not necessarily educated, but sometimes I’ll talk to my few friends who are students and wonder what they are really teaching in school. They are smart guys and very dedicated students, studying high level subjects, but sometimes the ideas that come out of these guys heads are so bad they make me question what education really means.

littlestircrazy · 2023-02-16T16:34:39+00:00

My flags are what they are, good or bad. They complement my boyfriend very well, though.

I'm very emotional. I cry at every sad part of every movie/song/book/news event, I get frustrated easily, I get very excited and happy when I'm doing something I love. It can be a lot to handle. My boyfriend is very calm and very helpful in accepting the emotions and getting me through the tough ones.
I'm a huge planner, constantly having possibilities for each day.
I love giving out compliments/thanks/appreciation, and my boyfriend's love language is words of affirmation. My boyfriend is very helpful without ever being asked, and my love language is acts of service.
I'm short and petite, with long hair and a semi-decent face. I don't do makeup or dress up.
I prioritize health, not in a counting-calories, weigh-in kind of way.
I don't like exercise, but am either rock climbing, snowboarding, hiking, or paddle boarding on any given day. I am very outdoorsy and expect my guy to be the same (thankfully he's much better than I am).
I make a lot of money. I work very little.
I love animals and children, and require both in my family's future (have a dog at present).
I am a traveler. Right now, we are vanlifing around America (and have been for over 2 years). I don't want a traditional life where we buy a house and stay put for 60 years. I have no idea where I'd even want to live if I had to settle.
I'm not great at communication or confrontation. I struggle to say what I mean or even understand what I mean. I'm much more expressive through emotions and physical touch than words.
I'm very frugal and won't spend money on anything unless it adds joy to my life. I don't like gifts or gift-giving.
I grew up to very young parents who were never married or together, which has had its fair share of drama when I was younger, but has never caused issues in my adult life

There's obviously a lot more, but I think this captures the main bits that I can think of right now.

Over_Noise3530 · 2023-02-17T02:55:22+00:00

Red: single mom, high n count, "dry texter" and introvert, resistance to cohabitation

Green: I know how to cook, I'm debt free, good credit, I don't expect men to pay for everything, I don't drink smoke or do drugs ever, don't go out much other than to work, rarely wear makeup, I'm thin and Im low maintenance about things like designer handbags, flashy cars, etc . I could care less about possessions

Title	Red Flag, Green Flag
Author	noafrochamplusamurai
Upvotes	5
Comments	65
Date	February 15, 2023 6:27 PM UTC (3 years ago)
Subreddit	Posted in /r/PurplePillDebate
Original Link	https://old.reddit.com/r/PurplePillDebate/comments/1134vwn/red_flag_green_flag/
Archive Link	https://theredarchive.com/r/PurplePillDebate/red-flag-green-flag.1152552 https://theredarchive.com/post/1152552

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