Rationale for Reactive Abuse

Flightlessbirbz · 2021-09-17T00:31:36+00:00

Physical violence in response to a verbal argument is never justified (slapping someone for being a dick). Neither is escalating physical violence unnecessarily (beating a woman because she slapped you). If your partner is being physically aggressive to you, leave. It’s over. Likewise, if your partner is infuriating you to the point you think you might get aggressive, leave, it’s over. It’s really that simple.

mxp68 · 2021-09-16T23:50:35+00:00

I’ve seen an increase in female on male violence, especially on social media.

I think most men were raised to never hit a woman. That’s good, but this has come with the unintended consequence of giving many women a false sense of security that she won’t face a physical retaliation for hitting a man, especially in public. And if she were to hit a man, and he tries to defend himself, a whole group of random “white knights” will step up to her rescue to become the hero. This certainly happens in bars during domestic spats.

That combined with women becoming less “lady like” (a term from 50 years ago) I think there is a lot more female on male abuse happening today than at any time in history. Its a bad trend that could end in men taking revenge or ending the stigma of men defending themselves in such situations.

Cimorene86 · 2021-09-16T22:58:14+00:00

I do not think that escalating from a verbal altercation to a physical fight is right or permissible. Words are words...slapping, punching, throwing things is another entirely.

Interestingly, over the years I've seen a lot of men on various RP blogs talk about how, if a woman verbally assaults/insults a man, she should be prepared to get punched or thrown on the ground. When I and others pointed out this would mean the man is throwing the first punch and escalating the fight, we were told "that is how men operate" and "men aren't going to let another man get away with insulting him without physical consequences, so a woman shouldn't either".

SunHatGoddess · 2021-09-16T22:51:58+00:00

I don’t watch tik tok. I can’t spare the brain cells.

SpanishM · 2021-09-16T23:13:16+00:00

> Women were using this logic to justify her physical violence,

Some women -way more you'd imagine- are violent, but mainstream media isn't showing it all. Now we have Youtube, Tiktok, etc. and can see it.

SmurfESmurferson · 2021-09-17T01:06:27+00:00

I can see that most of these replies are what I’d expect from PPD

So I’ll say this: there is never a reason to escalate to physical violence, ever. The correct answer is to walk out and leave

But both the OP and a lot of these replies clearly don’t understand how far some people will push things when they want a reaction

Some people consider any sort of passion to be fulfilling, even if it’s anger. Add alcohol and/or drugs to the mix, and it’s a dangerous combination

This sort of mindset is part of what makes BPD so scarring for men

TheBookOfSeil · 2021-09-17T00:28:30+00:00

It pretty much follows the same logic of "it's not racist to be racist toward white people." In this case, it's not sexist or bad to be sexist toward, or abuse men, because men committed the first offense at some point in the past.

Mimoxs · 2021-09-16T22:55:35+00:00

Women were using this logic to justify her physical violence, as if she did nothing wrong. Why do so many think that physical violence is an ok response to a non violent actions?

TikTok is a very feminized, female dominated space. You can easily find men justifying male-on-female abuse (also rape and occasionally murder) on 4chan.

To try and justify treating others poorly based on personal biases is merely human. We really need to stop treating things as gendered when they are not.

PlayfulLawyer · 2021-09-16T23:28:32+00:00

Well even when you take the dating aspect out of it, at the end of the day sometimes you got to watch what you say to people and what you do obviously physical violence is overwhelmingly not the appropriate reaction to verbal altercations but it is sometimes, you go up to the wrong person and talk about their family or use a racial slur , tells a very costly lie something like that, I can see and have seen certain scenarios where people might deserve to get punched out🤷‍♂️, now obviously when we're talkin about the idea of gendered violence, it's like Bill Burr said there's plenty of reason to hit a woman you're just not supposed to do it , you don't know what these dudes going to do in retaliation to that so keep your hands to yourself ladies lol

JameisBong · 2021-09-17T00:20:10+00:00

Women are still viewed as the weaker sex, despite having equal rights with their male counterparts. The average woman can get away with murder and blame the man for abuse and make it seem like her only way out was to kill the poor bastard.

Key-Progress-8873 · 2021-09-16T23:31:05+00:00

Women who physically abuse men should be met with retaliation to the abuse and have sense beaten into them. It's that simple.

SaBahRub · 2021-09-16T23:02:28+00:00

Tik tok says it’s ok so….what?

heyitsjeape · 2021-09-17T01:52:15+00:00

In my book, there is only one type of abuse - physical. The rest are unpleasant but not abuse.

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Rosa_linda_ · 2021-09-16T23:36:28+00:00

I don’t think most women (or men) think physical violence is a justified response to non violent actions.

Don’t take tik tok as the standard to real life lol

AerieIll3707 · 2021-09-17T00:52:55+00:00

Who cares. If you're scared a womans gonna hurt you hit the gym.

Let her have a few hits, if she starts hurting you put her down like a pitbull.

KJ1017 · 2021-09-17T05:12:33+00:00

It’s a double standard. It’s rooted in a simple conclusion based on readily available information.

We are all taught that under no circumstances should a man hit a woman. It’s regurgitated all the time. Women don’t get that message firmly shoved down their throat about hitting men. So they assume hitting men is okay.

It’s also easy for them to resort to hitting men when they don’t live under the same rules. If a man hits a man, it’s all but assured that man will strike back. So men move with some degree of caution around men. Women (think?) know men will never hit them, so it’s easier for them to escalate situations with men, because they genuinely feel protected by moral code.

Lastly, women don’t get hit by men. They don’t understand that we are significantly stronger than they are because of that. So a lot of them also genuinely believe that if push comes to shove they could go blow for blow with a man. They can’t.

All those factors give them extreme confidence when going into a altercation with men, and as a result they do it more often, and get positive reinforcement by way of white knights, social media, or cops arresting the man they assaulted. So that further enforces their belief that it’s ok.

chingness · 2021-09-17T08:00:35+00:00

Violence is never ok but sadly it’s normalised when it’s women again especially in movies / tv shows when women frequently slap men and it’s seen as funny or justified whereas the other way around it would be seen as disgusting. It really should never be ok to use violence against anyone regardless of gender or perceived strength /weakness

Notanothrshitthrow · 2021-09-17T08:10:39+00:00

The blind eye we have towards female on male abuse is honestly appalling. People will make any excuse in order to forgive and forget a female abuser, they just can't view women in that light. Abusive women know this and exploit it.

The reaction to Caroline Flack's suicide in the UK is the perfect example of this double standard in action.

Easteuroblondie · 2021-09-18T05:56:41+00:00

I don’t think she should be hitting him. That’s a failure in handling things regardless of gender, age, race, etc

Look, just like a lot of men, a lot of women have problematic behaviors. That’s not really gender specific

Lounly · 2021-09-16T22:41:55+00:00

It is a combination of three: reactive bahaviour without much into it (like when u hit someone in a bar), women having accountability of children (women are far more likely to do physical act of revenge on men) and out right antisocial behaviour/substance abuse. Not advocating violance against either gender, but lets be real, the reasons are obvious.

blueribbonskies · 2021-09-17T01:56:18+00:00

Pretending female and male violence are the same thing is ridiculous. No I am not saying people should hit eachother but pretending that it is the same level of aggression is ridiculous.

CloudBerryPunch · 2021-09-16T22:47:06+00:00

You mean slapping? That was a sign of passion in old movies here. I think it is interesting that that could be socialized. But outright punching and stuff, nah.

Title	Rationale for Reactive Abuse
Author	noafrochamplusamurai
Upvotes	19
Comments	151
Date	September 16, 2021 10:38 PM UTC (4 years ago)
Subreddit	Posted in /r/PurplePillDebate
Original Link	https://old.reddit.com/r/PurplePillDebate/comments/ppnsr5/rationale_for_reactive_abuse/
Archive Link	https://theredarchive.com/r/PurplePillDebate/rationale-for-reactive-abuse.1076038 https://theredarchive.com/post/1076038

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