What height do you prefer (an ideal +range + why) in your partner? A discussion :)

CimZim · 2023-02-19T11:19:55+00:00

I'm a woman. My height is 5'7.

My ideal height for a partner is a range of 5'4 - 5'10. This way they are at most 3" shorter or taller. It is very important to me because these heights are where you can make the easiest eye to eye contact...like you're equals, literally able to see the same things and be at each other's level both mentally and physically.

It is important to me that my partner not be significantly taller, because then he'd be inherently looming over me and it would cause constant hair raising on the back of my neck. Not a feeling I want to associate with the man I am supposed to love.

I live in the US, the average height of our men is 5'9 and average height of our women is 5'3. While I'm 4 inches taller than the female average, my guy is only 1 inch taller than the male average...some people have said this makes him "a tall man" but he's actually the third shortest of our mutual social circle, as some of our friends are as tall as 6'4. I'm the shortest, another guyfriend is 5'8, my guy is 5'10, and everyone else is at least 6'.

UpbeatInsurance5358 · 2023-02-19T10:35:07+00:00

Woman 5'3 and my ideal height is about 5'6- 5'11. I like this because I'm short but have long legs and arms, so anything over 6ft is unreachable to me, even sitting down. I like looking at faces and feeling hair, so if a guy is 6'4 with lovely hair then I'll never get to touch it! The shorter men fit me better.

Katatonicsnake · 2023-02-19T10:52:41+00:00

Ideal: 183-190 cm. I wouldn’t go taller, but I could go shorter (180 cm probably). I think men of that height range are aesthetically pleasing, tend to have masculine body type, and they aren’t too tall for me. F 172 cm. My husband is 187 cm. Height is not super important though, there are more important things to me. Edit: to be honest I don’t know, but both of my exes were 183 cm so I guess that’s some sort of a limit for me 🤷🏽‍♀️

Decent-Zombie-5513 · 2023-02-19T11:25:20+00:00

man, 190cm so 6'2 i think.

I don't care about my partner's height as long as they are not taller than me. I have a voice in the back of my head now tho telling me to have children with a tall woman in case i have sons as i want to do what i can to spare them the burden of being a manlet.

januaryphilosopher · 2023-02-19T11:33:12+00:00

I prefer someone who doesn't have so much of a height difference with me that it's impractical but is a good height for me to give forehead kisses and be big spoon. I like feeling tall and think there's just something appealing about those on the short side. I'm 5'7" and think the sweet spot comes in at about 5'4", but I'm happy with anyone whose height starts with a five (I wouldn't outright reject someone outside of that range, but it'd certainly turn height into a weighted factor). I'd like to, you know, be able to reach.

BN5130 · 2023-02-19T11:40:49+00:00

176 cm man here, my ideal height in women is 170-180 cm, with 175 cm being perfect. I like long, slender legs. But most 175 cm girls want someone who’s at least 183 cm. 190 being ideal probably.

Film2021 · 2023-02-19T12:51:04+00:00

M 6’0.

Perfect height on a woman is 5’4-5’7

Currently gf is 5’9 and I wish she was shorter. She got drunk once and said she wishes I was taller too though. Lol.

Due_Author350 · 2023-02-19T10:22:58+00:00

Say if you're male or female.

Male.

Say your own height. Be honest. Atleast don't lie by alot!!

5'2".

Say your "ideal".

Ideally within a foot of or so either way. Wouldn't be opposed to dating a woman outside of this range if we were really compatible otherwise.

Give a short justification/reason for why this height is important to you.

A really big height difference would make things physically awkward. That's all. I truly don't give a shit about women's height.

tinasnow-poty · 2023-02-19T11:27:26+00:00

Ample height is just sexy, that’s it

Female

5’2

My ideal height is 5’10-6’4.

Willing and have dated men from 5’8+. I did once go on a date a guy who was like 5’4 or 5’5, he was only a little taller than me but that was one of the reasons I didn’t want to go any further

I agree from down here it’s hard to distinguish whether someone is 6’1 or 6’3 but I can tell when someone is under 5’10, but it doesn’t bother me if I think they’re cute. For me, face > height. Would rather date a handsome 5’9 than a medium ugly 6’2.

I don’t doubt at all 6’1 is preferred to 6’7. I want someone tall, not a beanstalk. At those heights it’s extremely hard to fill out mass wise so those guys are usually tall and skinny, and I prefer filled out muscle wise. 6’5+ is when it starts getting a bit weird, as well as extremely impractical for both of us. My ex was 6’4 and that was pretty annoying logistically.

Im sorry to tall women but I need to give my kids a fighting chance and snag a tall dude. We can’t both be short. My bf is 6ft which is perf to me

blebbyroo · 2023-02-19T09:58:36+00:00

Ideal: 6’ -6’3 and I’m 5’5

It’s never been a deal breaker though I’ve dated a guy who was 5’7, 1 who was 5’8 2 who were 5’10 1 was 5’11, another was 6’3 and my current partner is 6’1

statsfodder · 2023-02-19T10:40:51+00:00

The fact height is a filter on dating apps answers the question you have.

ThrowAwayBro737 · 2023-02-19T11:07:02+00:00

The studies on this are quite varied!

No they’re not. They all say the same thing. Men don’t care about female height because we’re “polygamous” and seek replication value from multiple women. Women care about height more than any other factor because they’re “hypergamous” and seek protection and provisioning from the best man they can attract.

The best example of this was from a study that asked men and women what their ideal height for a partner would be. What were the results? For men, they said the ideal would be when the male is one inch taller than the female. For women, they said the ideal would be when the male is seven inches taller than the female.

Barneysparky · 2023-02-19T10:10:06+00:00

3-4 inches taller than me. Most of the couples I know fit this mold, the men around my height, 5.7 have short girlfriends.

The way guys talk about height being the reason why they can never get a date I wonder why they are not advocating for short people to be banned from dating.

Substantial_Video560 · 2023-02-19T11:04:45+00:00

It really doesn't matter to me. Saying that since I no longer date the question is irrelevent.

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HazyMemory7 · 2023-02-19T11:41:14+00:00

I care very little about height in a woman but ideal would be ~5'5 to 5'6.

kalashhhhhhhh · 2023-02-19T11:50:20+00:00

I'm 5'7 and female.

I'd prefer my partner to be as tall as me or taller. Since 5'11 is the average for men in my country, literally almost every man meets this criteria. I wouldn't be opposed to dating a guy a few centimeters shorter, too. I guess everything north of 164 cm (Michael J Fox's height lol) is okay.

I never simped for height as some girls do. It was literally never on my list of requirements and preferences. I never deliberately looked for a tall guy. I spent 4 years with a 5'7 ex, and I was physically attracted to him. I had crushes on two shortest guys in my class in middle school, if that counts.

My boyfriend is 6'5. I can't say I prefer that height, oftentimes we wish one of us was 5 inches taller/shorter. I definitely didn't go for him because of his height. He often says that he wouldn't go for shorter than 5'7 lol. Kissing while standing up and certain sexual positions are a bit harder to manage. It does have its own perks, however (being picked up and carried like it's nothing, definitely gives you a bit of status among girls).

In conclusion, height doesn't really play that big of a role in attraction, for me personally. Face and aesthetics are much more important for physical attraction. Dating a guy your same height and a guy much taller both have their perks and downsides.

_revelationary · 2023-02-19T11:53:06+00:00

I am a woman. 33yo and have been dating my husband since 2010.

I’m 5’9”. I prefer a man right around 6’0”, which my husband is. Maybe 5’11.5 but he rounds up. It just feels like our bodies are compatible…I’m not sure how else to say it. I have never dated someone significantly taller than that but I have several male family members around 6’3” to 6’5” who just seem ridiculously tall to me and I was never interested in aiming for a super tall man.

I’ve dated a guy shorter than me and have had several crushes on guys shorter than me, so height has never been a dealbreaker. My range would probably be low 5s, maybe 5’4” or so, for the right person (not saying their height wouldn’t feel a little odd, I just wouldn’t write them off completely). I think shorter men were often less interested in me - except one guy who definitely had a thing for taller girls.

DoinIt989 · 2023-02-19T12:14:19+00:00

Male, 5'6", ideal height for a woman is 5'5" or taller.

SeriousFlaps · 2023-02-19T12:28:50+00:00

I'm 5'7.5" and my partner is about 5'10". To me that's the ideal height, because I prefer somebody of a similar height to myself, and I wouldn't want him to feel insecure if I was taller than him (many years ago he didn't like when I wore heels because it made me taller, it doesn't bother him now though!).

I don't know why I prefer somebody the same height as me. I'd honestly prefer a man to be a bit shorter than me than say 6'5" or something. Never been attracted to height.

2023-02-19T12:38:09+00:00

Male

6'2

5'10 to 6'4

I'm above average height so that explains one part of it. Also both tall men and women have always been attractive to me so I definitely prefer women around my height. Even though tall women are rare they kinda stick out in a crowd.

northernlights190 · 2023-02-19T12:45:47+00:00

I’m female.

Overall I just don’t really care about height. I’ve happily dated and desired men from 5’1 to 6’2. That said, I’m short and I tend to prefer guys closer to my height. My sweet spot seems to be the 5’6 to 5’9 range, in terms of who I’ve dated most and who I am most often attracted to. I’ve dated more guys under 5’7 than over.

So I wouldn’t say that is an ideal or “important” to me, but I do tend to go for shorter guys. I just like the way our bodies fit together, feels like a match for lack of a better word, which is appealing. And overall I find a more compact, lean and lithe body type extremely pleasing to look at, aesthetically.

Quiet-Lie-219 · 2023-02-19T13:11:57+00:00

I’m a guy, around 5’7”, in terms of height probably anywhere from 5’2” to I dunno… 5’5”? Being taller isn’t a turn off but being exactly the same height would probably just be awkward. No natural spooning position :(

NeonCityNights · 2023-02-19T13:15:08+00:00

I'm a 6'3 male. So tall in general, but short on r/tall.

I suppose my ideal is a 5'10 to 6'2 female. I've always preferred taller women but they're hard to find in my area.

I understand the advantages that can be conferred based on my height, but I have other issues that act against me. Namely, although I have a good BMI, I'm not photogenic. Although I have a useful stem degree, I 'm not career driven (not interested in status). I'm also fairly introverted and don't like texting a lot. All these things turn off women.

So although I'm tall and prefer taller women, I consider my pickings to be slim-ish. But I go for tall women.

lolthankstinder · 2023-02-19T13:32:36+00:00

Self-serving bias + Hawthorne effect bias = women eager to claim they don’t care as much about height and the woman that do don’t comment or underexaggerate it. It’s better to examine height preference in an environment where people don’t feel observed like dating apps.

Title	What height do you prefer (an ideal +range + why) in your partner? A discussion :)
Author	Aware_Chocolate_2902
Upvotes	4
Comments	154
Date	February 19, 2023 5:44 AM UTC (3 years ago)
Subreddit	Posted in /r/PurplePillDebate
Original Link	https://old.reddit.com/r/PurplePillDebate/comments/1162til/what_height_do_you_prefer_an_ideal_range_why_in/
Archive Link	https://theredarchive.com/r/PurplePillDebate/what-height-do-you-prefer-an-ideal-range-why-in.1152142 https://theredarchive.com/post/1152142

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