Link: https://archive.is/BMX89
Summary: Father has two daughter. The youngest daughter is more traditional minded, meets an Indian guy in second year of college, and gets married. Oldest daughter went to an out of state college, and rode the CC on steroids there. She gets jealous of her younger sister, and suddenly wants a traditional Indian man. Father turns to Reddit for help.
Fasten your seatbelts fellas, you are in for a ride.
I am a father of two daughters, and we are from India. My daughters were both born and raised here however. Parenting in America was not really easy on me or my daughters. There is such a clash of cultures and values that I didn’t know what exactly to do as a father.
Father is clueless about America and the culture. This is an important point to have in my mind.
I did my best to preserve as much of our culture as we could, I had them take Hindi classes, my daughters both loved to partake in Indian dances, and they both excelled in school. But when my eldest daughter started her college education things started to change. She went to a school out of state, and really partook in the entire American culture. She was asking for money for books when in reality she was spending it on partying and clothes. I only found out about this because of my youngest, whom showed me through Facebook. I told her this was not how I raised her or the person I wanted her to become. We argued a lot, my wife and I essentially gave up on our side. We wanted to preserve our relationship with our daughter, so we took a hands off approach.
She got her carousel riding sponsored by her parents, what the world has come to. The interesting thing that I have noticed in cases like this (Immigrant parents with carousel riding daughters) is that the mother is always more against her daughter’s behavior than her father. Just an interesting thing I have noticed.
So we as a family just ignored that of our daughter, her new boyfriends. I would continue to pay for her college and necessities but if she wanted to exceed and buy money for clothes it would be through a job of her own…… When our youngest started going to school, we feared she too would be radically Americanized. However, that wasn’t the case she got involved in the Indian Community on campus. During her second year of college, she told us she he had a boyfriend, we ended up meeting him and his parents. Though he wasn’t in our caste, he was Indian as well had a similar upbringing and similar values. After college we approved of them getting married.
“new boyfriendS” – How many dicks did she give swallow? Even girls who ride the carousel hardcore, don’t introduce a bunch of guys as their boyfriends to their parents. At least her parents made her pay for the carousel riding on her own. Her younger sister ending up getting an Indian boyfriend and they got married after college.
My eldest, ended up getting a job in California and didn’t speak to us much in general. My wife was the one whom always had the closest relationship with our daughter but after my daughter’s rebellion my wife stopped talking to her. I ended up being the one who would call and keep in touch with our daughter. She didn’t want much to do with us.
Again. Notice how the mother disapproves of her daughters actions while the father is the one who keeps intact. Just imagine what type of upbringing she had. Do you think she looked up to her father, respected him? Or do you think she looked at her father as an “dumb immigrant who pays for my college”? Her mom gets that taking Chad, Brad, and Tom`s dick at once will decrease her SMV.
As time went on my youngest daughter and her husband recently had their first child. For the celebration my daughter came to visit us. She stayed for about a week, and we bonded together as a family. Soon after she got went back, she was skyping with me and her sister. Me and her have been talking far more now than ever before which I am truly grateful for. She has mentioned to me now that she would like me to find a guy for her, or someone that fills the traditional Indian role. A part of me was really happy to hear this, but as I discussed this further with my wife I don’t think it is in her best interest.
Surprise, surprise. She sees her younger sister having a child and a marriage, and suddenly the carousel doesn’t seem that attractive anymore – at the age of 27. Suddenly the Indian guy she rejected back in college seems super attractive. After all, he is a doctor with a six-figure salary, and Chad won’t commit. And suddenly she wants to talk to her parents again. DADDY I NEED HELP!
I don’t think our daughter would be a suitable person for this type of marriage. She has already had plenty of relationships, and If I had to bet she has had sex. She loves to socialize, drink, go to bars. I don’t doubt that there is a guy out there that she could end up with, however I don’t think I will be one to find such a guy in the traditional Indian community.
This father is so fucking clueless and beta. “If I had to bet she has had sex” – wtf? The betting should be on the amounts of dicks she has taken, not if she has taken any.
My daughter has requested, that I help her look but what exactly do I tell her? I know it took a lot coming to me, to ask for dating helps. I don’t want to reject her in a way that will distance her from our family, but at the same time I don’t want her to get into a life that isn’t going to be enough for her. And I personally don’t feel comfortable expunging details about her past to a future partner. At least for marriage, if a man or a woman has drunk alcohol or touched chicken, can cause all sorts of problems when going through marriage. It's not to say that there aren't Indian men, that don't share Western Values, but they often aren't the ones looking for an arranged marriage either.
This is so fucking funny. “And I personally don’t feel comfortable expunging details about her past to a future partner” – Lmao, her own father is enabling her carousel riding. Again, notice how it is the father and not the mother who enables her carousel riding. I have a bunch of Indian and Asian friends, and this story is a very common story that gets repeated again and again in these communities. Daughters go to college, is fucked by every Chad, Brad and Tom. Then suddenly right before the crashes into the wall, she wants a traditional guy (and that guy was brutally rejected back in college).
Lessons: AWALT. And for my Asian/Indian bros, NEVER MAKE THIS MISTAKE. I have seen it too many times. If a girl didn’t give you her time and commitment during college, NEVER do the same later in life.
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