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[–]AnnieJ123456 82 points83 points84 points 4 years ago (24 children) | Copy Link
You guys are so damn logical. Women are emotional creatures. Emotions is the currency. I mean y’all are designed that way but maybe first get in touch w your emotional side before approaching women. Most young women cannot rationalize their emotions due to lack of life experience. It’s just all about emotions.
[–]Refroedgerator 19 points20 points21 points 4 years ago (13 children) | Copy Link
I agree, which tends to be what I suck at is emotions xd. Without going into detail, Im in a profession where everything is always super serious. Ill work on this, thank you for the advice!
[–]AnnieJ123456 26 points27 points28 points 4 years ago (6 children) | Copy Link
No babe you don’t suck at emotions we all have them but women are more emotionally dominant so most don’t even know why they rejected you; there’s no point of trying to wonder what happened. It’s literally just emotions. Give her good emotions. Then looks go out the door so fast it’s not even funny! :) good luck babe! You got this!
[–]Ohhhwordddd 6 points7 points8 points 4 years ago (4 children) | Copy Link
How does one give off good emotions? Any tips ?
[–]chatpal91 9 points10 points11 points 4 years ago (2 children) | Copy Link
You ever caught yourself wearing a bitch face? Like realized that you've had a sad look on your face? I do all the time. Well sometimes specifically telling yourself to "put a smile on" can effect other things like your demeanor, posture and attitude
[–]Ohhhwordddd 8 points9 points10 points 4 years ago (0 children) | Copy Link
Shit that was literally me yesterday, I was with a new group of people my friend took me along, I was fine until the end of the night when everybody was pretty much having 1 on 1 convos and I just felt kinda down cause I didn’t have that, this chick sat beside me to talk and we did but I was already in that negative mind state and I didn’t have the mental energy to be charismatic but I did enough to where she added my on Snapchat. I gotta work on that tho
[–]grahamcrackers37 2 points3 points4 points 4 years ago (0 children) | Copy Link
In yoga I leaned that is easier/feels better to smile when stretching than to crunch up your face. I try to apply this to my entire life.
[–]AnnieJ123456 5 points6 points7 points 4 years ago (0 children) | Copy Link
Conjure up good emotions within yourself. Positive inner self talk and feel good about yourself bc women can read you fast! You should think “damn she thinks I’m So hot” ..etc
[–]Mog_Melm 2 points3 points4 points 4 years ago (0 children) | Copy Link
^^^ Annie over here is talkin' SENSE!
[–]chuckvsthelife 8 points9 points10 points 4 years ago (0 children) | Copy Link
Honestly, as someone who went through the whole I’m a robot thing for so long… therapy.
[–]Velociraptor2018 -1 points0 points1 point 4 years ago (3 children) | Copy Link
Engineer gang?
[–]Refroedgerator -1 points0 points1 point 4 years ago (1 child) | Copy Link
Not even close x)
[–]GoinWithThePhloem 0 points1 point2 points 3 years ago (0 children) | Copy Link
That was the first thing I thought of
[–]SeaPen333 0 points1 point2 points 4 years ago (0 children) | Copy Link
Could be bad breath, or something else.
how often do you smile? How often do you smile with your eyes? Smile with eyes and mouth, flash raise your eyebrows and tilt head to side.
[–][deleted] 32 points33 points34 points 4 years ago (0 children) | Copy Link
Yes this, that’s why self image and confidence is so attractive to women. A man that has masculine qualities will see himself in a certain light. He will “feel” his masculinity therefore women will feel it to. OP has to develop some sexual appeal, a not giving a fuck attitude, and basically having fun in his own way. A good looking guy is bland as hell without that spark he’s just another guy
[–]NiNj4_C0W5L4Pr 11 points12 points13 points 4 years ago (2 children) | Copy Link
Exactly. You're doing fuckall to engage women emotionally. This is a major stumbling block for a lot of men because, well,...emotions are scary to men.
QuickAsFuckExample: Engage women the way Han Solo does with Leia in Empire Strikes Back when he tries to seduce her while she's working. (He lowers his voice, signals sexual attraction/intent with his body language/intense bedroom-eyes-contact & slight cocky smirk)...these actions signal to a woman that you are interested in being more than a friend. Then turn around and walk, the fuck, away. Wait a day or three & see if she finds you or texts you wanting to talk/hangout, etc...
Pro Tip: Nothing you could ever do is more powerful than what a woman can imagine about you in her mind. So give her something to obsess about & let her marinate herself until she's ready for you.
[–]Spirited_Gap_8851 0 points1 point2 points 4 years ago (1 child) | Copy Link
u/profanitycounter
[–]Snakehead004 2 points3 points4 points 4 years ago (2 children) | Copy Link
To add to this, emotional maturity takes time. They're just realizing who they are and have no idea what they want and/or need in a partner at this point. It's just a mess hormones, trial and error..
[–]AnnieJ123456 2 points3 points4 points 4 years ago (1 child) | Copy Link
Yeah seriously and y’all are being too hard on yourselves and the women demanding they must know. Common guys we are still growing up and realizing. Let’s enjoy the process. Destination is a given.
[–]Snakehead004 2 points3 points4 points 4 years ago (0 children) | Copy Link
Yup! Enjoy the ride cause it ends before you know it
[–]Snoo-20788 5 points6 points7 points 4 years ago (1 child) | Copy Link
Which is precisely you should usually not believe what a woman says, they tend to not really know exactly what they want.
[–]AnnieJ123456 0 points1 point2 points 4 years ago (0 children) | Copy Link
Yap!
[–]FaithInStrangers94 0 points1 point2 points 4 years ago (0 children) | Copy Link
Is that why Ted Bundy received more love letters than most of us ever will?
[–]Nullroute127 7 points8 points9 points 4 years ago (3 children) | Copy Link
Stab at the dark, but I'm going to guess your conversations are too platonic. Thus, when you ask for a date or something in that sphere - there's no precedence for it and comes out of left field.
You might need to practice some push-pull, showing intent, and making the conversation man to woman.
[–]Snakehead004 1 point2 points3 points 4 years ago (0 children) | Copy Link
I spent my teems a s beginning of 20s with this problem. Friends but couldn't make the jump. I later realized many were just waiting for me to make the move. I finally learned how to flirt. It's a different eye contact, slightly different jokes and touches. Watch Ryan Reynolds in his movies but be WAY more subtle..
[–]Refroedgerator 0 points1 point2 points 4 years ago (1 child) | Copy Link
Agreed
[–]Nullroute127 0 points1 point2 points 4 years ago (0 children) | Copy Link
Oddly enough, this video ended up in my suggestions. It goes over exactly this.
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=482raG\_4t1A
[–][deleted] 19 points20 points21 points 4 years ago (19 children) | Copy Link
Friends will bump you up a few points. To be nice and because your personality will influence them. If a friend tells you you're a 7 i'd say probably 6-soft 5 territory.
Wheat waffles does really deep dives on face symmetry and stuff. I would take it with a big grain of salt but he is trying to be as objective as possible. He does blame usually everything on looks so i wouldn't go past the "rating" benefit of his channel.
But if you're truly looking good and having no success maybe you're not giving a good vibe. I'd start by sleeping at 10-11pm, no porn/masturbation for a few weeks/a month and reevaluate then.
[–]Refroedgerator 5 points6 points7 points 4 years ago (8 children) | Copy Link
For clarification, I didnt ask my friend group. I had my friend group ask women that didnt know me personally and were unbiased as possible (plus I have a sister who asked her friends). Secondly, just personal opinion but wheatwaffles is a moron his rating scheme is off imo. Beyond that though, I appreciate the advice
[–][deleted] 1 point2 points3 points 4 years ago (0 children) | Copy Link
Ok, fair enough
[–][deleted] 1 point2 points3 points 4 years ago (3 children) | Copy Link
Secondly, just personal opinion but wheatwaffles is a moron his rating scheme is off imo
Why do you say his ratings are off?
Cause he's a YouTube looser lol. Wake up and realize a scammer when you see one. ANYONE can rate ppl its called old
[–][deleted] 0 points1 point2 points 4 years ago (1 child) | Copy Link
ANYONE can rate ppl its called old
True, True lol
And that's an even more brutal rating too
[–]Snakehead004 0 points1 point2 points 4 years ago (0 children) | Copy Link
Yup and probably more useful in this arena
Yeah that youbube dude nonsensical and absolutely trash
[–]ftdrain 3 points4 points5 points 4 years ago (0 children) | Copy Link
Wheat is def not a moron and his rating is pretty accurate
[–]tehnomaniak 0 points1 point2 points 3 years ago (0 children) | Copy Link
You are a moron, and wheat would give you 4/10 AT BEST.
[–]Marcoscondit 1 point2 points3 points 4 years ago (0 children) | Copy Link
Lol you listen to that in cell wheat Waffles
[–]klimber2097 0 points1 point2 points 4 years ago (2 children) | Copy Link
Do you really think masturbating is an issue? With porn I agree, but masturbating should make you more "relaxed" and less tense
[–]Refroedgerator 4 points5 points6 points 4 years ago (0 children) | Copy Link
From OP's POV: I think for me yes, it fucks with my energy levels and social interactions. In other words, I actually feel more drained and want to put less effort into socializing
[–][deleted] 0 points1 point2 points 4 years ago (0 children) | Copy Link
Depends on every person but usually it gives you more motivation to pursue women. If you masturbate once a week maybe not a big deal but for most people it's a compulsion to do it every day almost.
[–]Excellent_Bowler_988 0 points1 point2 points 4 years ago (1 child) | Copy Link
why no porn for a few weeks?
porn and masturbation will drain you and replace a biological need
[–]Snakehead004 0 points1 point2 points 4 years ago (3 children) | Copy Link
Hahahah this link is laughable!! Wtf is wrong with ppl nowadays. Tinder is all the rating system you need lol
[–][deleted] 1 point2 points3 points 4 years ago (2 children) | Copy Link
There's also https://www.reddit.com/r/Rateme/ , same things apply. They use a scale of objective symmetry and balance, it's pretty interesting.
[–]Snakehead004 0 points1 point2 points 4 years ago (1 child) | Copy Link
This is much more legit imo. It's group based and not for profit
[–]Refroedgerator 1 point2 points3 points 4 years ago (0 children) | Copy Link
r/rateme cucks me because they dont put my post through until a day later, at which point it doesnt get seen. I resorted to r/amiugly and r/amiuglybrutallyhonest (not even my best pics) and was considered one of the attractive ones on there, but factoring in gaslighting, I still think the ratings my friends received from their mutuals was more accurate, and I had a wide range of variety in sources. Im settling at a 7, with the understanding that subjectivity can bump me higher or lower depending on the person
[–]CompetitionFair7686 12 points13 points14 points 4 years ago (16 children) | Copy Link
Well, it probably has to do with not understanding women, and social dynamics between women and men.
Many guys also think they have to act like they see in romantic movies, which is a mistake. The guy acting like a good boyfriend trying to prove he would make a good boyfriend hoping the girl will realise that it makes sense to be with him.
Other guys, are just too logical and generic with women, they don’t stand out, and are generally boring with them, they don’t take risks with her, they are too respectful with women, and wouldn’t even there to express how how the girl is or the things he would do to her. They act as if sex was disgusting or for pervs because they think women hate guys who want sex.
And also other guys just try to get so close to girls, that they become best friends with her, they hang out a lot, talk a lot of time, they can talk about anything with them, and then the guy confesses his feelings and the girl says she only likes him as a friend.
[–]Refroedgerator 2 points3 points4 points 4 years ago (15 children) | Copy Link
Yeah Ive definitely seen that. While I wouldnt assess myself to fall fully in the middle category, I definitely have elements where I dont feel like I spark a girl's interest as much as I should. With that though, my follow up question would be: how can I do that if I can't even get them to agree to a first date?
[–]CompetitionFair7686 6 points7 points8 points 4 years ago (2 children) | Copy Link
First things is that you should approach girls in person and forget about dating apps, and text messages. Just basically forget all sorts of online communication for now with g irks and focus on learning how to talk to women face to face in real life.
Then you need to try to maintain the conversation for at least 10 minutes with any new girl you approach in person.
The conversation needs to have humour, it needs to get her to talk about herself positively, and you must get her to feel valued by expressing which traits and qualities you have noticed she has as a person, that make her stand out beyond her looks.
Once, that’s done. You can start flirting smoothly, to show your romantic/sexual intentions, and if the vibe is right suggest a plan to go out either in that specific moment or the next day.
Yes, I almost exclusively am referring to girls Ive had good social interactions with in person in this post. Hmm, perhaps I need to make her feel more valued via traits and qualities as you suggest; Ive never really attempted that. Most conversations are a back and forth or surface level (although I seem to think they go well for what its worth). I appreciate this advice, thank you.
[–]CompetitionFair7686 1 point2 points3 points 4 years ago (0 children) | Copy Link
Staying on surface levels means you don’t really connect with them. You have to get personal with them and create sexual tension.
[–]JanetInSC1234 4 points5 points6 points 4 years ago (11 children) | Copy Link
You definitely need to spark their interest before you even think about asking for a first date. In other words, don't ask a girl out until you have: made her laugh, held eye contact, complimented her on something she's done (NOT her looks), shared...as in had a back and forth conversation about something relevant to both of you. See? That kind of chemistry starts well before any date.
[–]Refroedgerator 2 points3 points4 points 4 years ago (10 children) | Copy Link
Makes sense, although Id say in a majority of my cases Ive done all of the above and still got rejected. Maybe making a girl laugh, eye contact, and conversations alone isnt enough to spark romantic interest?
[–]JanetInSC1234 1 point2 points3 points 4 years ago (2 children) | Copy Link
Don't give up. Do you have a friend you can practice on? Also, maybe you're just picking the wrong people. Are those women very good-looking? If so, they are already being pursued. And they may already have a boyfriend. You'll have better luck with someone who matches you in looks, wealth, and education--or style and smarts. Since you are still getting your sea-legs, pick someone who is a little eager.
[–]Refroedgerator 2 points3 points4 points 4 years ago (1 child) | Copy Link
Unfortunately I dont have girls in my social circle who I could practice with, as most are in relationships. I dont know that I agree that I need to aim lower per say, I like to think Im not overly picky and like mentioned, am in the 6-7 range myself, so above average. Perhaps Im just shooting for women in the wrong social climate and need to look elsewhere, as I tend to ask out women around professional settings as opposed to strictly social ones, so you might be right there.
[–]JanetInSC1234 0 points1 point2 points 4 years ago (0 children) | Copy Link
Well, you could suggest group dates. In other words, "Laura, a few of us are going out after work. You should join us."
[–]CompetitionFair7686 0 points1 point2 points 4 years ago (6 children) | Copy Link
When you say you get rejected? How? What do you propose to them exactly? What exact words do you say? What is your whole conversation like? Write it like a dialogue of a movie script
[–]Refroedgerator 1 point2 points3 points 4 years ago (5 children) | Copy Link
Typically Ill get her number after talking for a bit. Ill text her an idea like "Hey do you want to grab coffee at x place at y time" or something along tthose lines, and then the excuses roll in baby LOL Occasionally Ill get ghosted but very rarely, only once recently. Sorry for not creating an exact dialogue but I ask out enough women that I dont want to pinpoint just one instance
[–]CompetitionFair7686 0 points1 point2 points 4 years ago (4 children) | Copy Link
I’m talking about in person.
How do your conversations, before you ask them out, go exactly phrase by phrase?
How do you get to know them face to face?
You can write it like:
You: Hey my name is tom, nice to meet you
Her: Hi, my name is Sarah
You: You new in this place? Never see. you here before?
Her: Yeah blah blah blah
[–]Refroedgerator 0 points1 point2 points 4 years ago (3 children) | Copy Link
Hmm. Its fuzzy so Im not exactly sure I remember or have a pattern I follow. I typically dont struggle with introducing myself or talking casually at the first meeting. Im sorry this isnt super helpful xd
[–]CompetitionFair7686 -1 points0 points1 point 4 years ago (2 children) | Copy Link
It’s not helpful, because the problem is literally in your dialogues. And if you can’t give examples of how you talk with a girl then all you will get is vague advice which won’t help and you will continue to get rejected. Next time you talk to a girl you should record it, and then transcribe it, so we can look at it. But up to you.
Perhaps, although even if I gave a dialogue it may not translate great over text because of the inability to show emotion and interpersonal interaction via reddit. That being said, I really do appreciate the continued attempt to save my goofy goober ass
[–]Babymonster09 2 points3 points4 points 4 years ago (0 children) | Copy Link
I will tell you something, good looking guys are just good looking UNLESS they have a personality, then they are attractive in my eyes. What I mean by this is that you can be “pretty” or “handsome” but without a nice personality then it’s just pretty packaging, know what I mean? Work on the out stuff but work more on the internal stuff. I will legit prefer to date an “average” or non conventional looking guy with a great personality (and I have) over dating a pretty guy with none (have as well and it Didnt even take off because of this). Best of luck op!
[–]GordonGecko69 6 points7 points8 points 4 years ago (2 children) | Copy Link
I truly f@&king hate this way of thinking. It is by far the most detrimental to your success with women. Every clown who can’t get laid sums a woman’s interest into two things, money and looks. That’s a f@&king cop out. It’s your excuse and your rationalization for why you can’t have luck with women and why if you DO believe you have one or the other of these two traits you question the universe on why you don’t get p@&sy. If you don’t believe me, scroll through the posts in this group and see how many are saying “I don’t have this particular trait so I’ll never get women” or “I have this particular trait so why don’t I get women”. It’s not the trait, it’s YOU!
How many women have you seen throw their lives away over some f@&king broke ass low life or dude who looks like an extra from the walking dead? If money and/or looks were so important this would never happen. And this is a GOOD thing.
Brad Pitt should be the Holy Grail of PUAs. Google his high school pics. He was a tennis playing dork with glasses. He built a persona, moved to Hollywood and took that shit over like a f@&king BOSS.
Work on building an image that is attractive holistically. Men are visual creatures. So WE are the ones who are more focused on looks (even though we’ll f@&k a snake if you hold its head open). Are you interesting? Do you appear to be a sexual being to women? Are you appealing to other women? Why would she want to f@&k you? If being a 7/10 is all you got, good luck with that.
I wasnt bragging about being a 7/10, I only made the point to illustrate my looks aren't an issue according to women; only one part of my post. You seem mad bro, and that for sure aint attractive, especially in giving advice. It makes you come off like you lack the ability to control your emotions. That being said, you make a couple of good points, so Ill give you that
[+]GordonGecko69 -7 points-6 points-5 points 4 years ago (0 children) | Copy Link
Nobody said you are bragging. You have clearly missed the point. Also, understand that you are reading words. They have no emotion. That part you add yourself. Perhaps being over sensitive and overthinking things is what is helping to cause your problems. Don’t take things so seriously. Being confident and relaxed shows you are in control and that alone will improve your chances with women 1000x.
[–]VisionsOfVisions 1 point2 points3 points 4 years ago (4 children) | Copy Link
Your post describes nothing about you. I know your age, gender, attractiveness score of 7/10, and 100% failure rate. You ask generic questions and want to be asked questions in order to provide clarification.
Now, I know this post isn’t your dating profile, but if it reflects 10% of your profile, it’s not looking good…
Other than your 7/10 looks, what are aspects of you that you believe are attractive about you? What aspects of you do you believe are unattractive about you?
[–]Refroedgerator 1 point2 points3 points 4 years ago (3 children) | Copy Link
I dont think in terms of online dating and profiles because I dont use that garbage, but your overall points are fair enough. Speaking with some people now, I think the bad qualities are Im too generic and lack emotion. Good qualities super purpose driven and hard working, can fend for myself, and can make women feel protected. I didnt necessarily put in the effort to sell myself over this post, which is why people are defaulting to my looks, which is my bad. Thanks for pointing that out.
[–]SizzleLumps 1 point2 points3 points 4 years ago (2 children) | Copy Link
Man you need to enjoy yourself. This is the answer you’re looking for, I believe. And I say this because you seem to be treating everything as an exchange, just based on the comments I’m reading.
When you are expecting something from a girl, as in, if you work up to a point where you pique interest and ask to hang out or whatever it is, only to be flaked or rejected, the vibes you’re giving off all point towards neediness. I.e., needing the girl to accept your advances.
It’s so much easier to access and give off good vibes/emotions if you’re simply enjoying yourself. Do you know what I mean? If you’re having fun, the girls will see this, versus you doing what you think you’re supposed to be doing in an effort to court them. They can sense the difference in this energy. Which is more attractive??
My suggestion would be to put yourself in more social situations where you are also able to express yourself in a fun way. Eventually things will click with a gal that likes the fun version of you rather than the needy, “can we see if we’re a match” version. Hope this helps.
Makes sense. Thank you
[–]SizzleLumps 1 point2 points3 points 4 years ago (0 children) | Copy Link
Absolutely :) I want to add one more thing. And people may find this controversial, but you want to be doing these fun things where you also are being a leader. Women like the leaders of the group. Find your strengths, express your confidence and naturally you will be given more attention. It’s a bit of an upward spiraling effect. Makes everything easier, and honestly this is where the road ends for strict physical attractiveness. Go get ‘em
[–]SleepyBeast89 1 point2 points3 points 4 years ago (1 child) | Copy Link
You’re not making them laugh enough.
[–]Refroedgerator 0 points1 point2 points 4 years ago (0 children) | Copy Link
You right
[–]KaleWeekly 1 point2 points3 points 4 years ago (1 child) | Copy Link
You must flirt. Flirting is how you avoid the friendzone.
Tru, but I gotta learn how first :(
[–][deleted] 4 years ago (9 children) | Copy Link
[permanently deleted]
[–]SizzleLumps 1 point2 points3 points 4 years ago (8 children) | Copy Link
because you clearly hate yourself. change that. how do you expect someone to love you when you don’t love yourself? give yourself some perspective. if you were a hot girl would you want to fuck a guy who talks badly about himself and probably doesn’t take the best care of himself? get 1% better every day and in a year you will look in the mirror and feel genuinely proud. i’m rooting for you
[–][deleted] 4 years ago (7 children) | Copy Link
[–]SizzleLumps 0 points1 point2 points 4 years ago (0 children) | Copy Link
well, i feel truly sorry for you that you will probably never be happy. it’s no one’s responsibility but your own to help yourself be the best version of yourself. you actively will never reach that when you have the mindset you currently do, and that is actually something in your power to change, whether you believe me or not. it’s a psychological phenomenon called self-fulfilling prophecy
[–]SizzleLumps 0 points1 point2 points 4 years ago (5 children) | Copy Link
not to mention all the content you fill your mind with, all the time you spend in the day thinking like this. obviously it’s no wonder you feel this way. you need help, and therapy. again, it’s your responsibility to seek it. if you think it’s worthless, those thoughts will fulfill what you already believe to be true. yet it’s in your power to take action and do something, getting that help will change the trajectory of your life. up to you man
[–][deleted] 4 years ago (4 children) | Copy Link
that’s not how it works in every situation homie. since you are using your anecdotal experience, i will use mine: i’ve been rejected by plenty of women. i have been rejected by entire groups of people. what has made me overcome it is moving on with myself because i know i have self worth. there are other people in the world to connect with, so i focus on those people that do value me.
it’s the mindset that no one will appreciate you that is preventing you from even beginning to find the people who could enrich your life in the first place. that’s my whole point. if you fixed your mental health you would change your trajectory. but for some reason you are unable to take yourself in hand because “no matter how hard you try you will never be accepted” that’s absolute bullshit. believe what you want, it’s your life.
[–]SizzleLumps 0 points1 point2 points 4 years ago (2 children) | Copy Link
“i don’t because i don’t” great argument man. perfect logic. so sad. your personality also takes a hit when these are the only thoughts in your head. that’s why i say you need help. you don’t want help, ok that’s tough, may as well end it huh
[–][deleted] 4 years ago (1 child) | Copy Link
you don’t believe you are a sexual being. so you won’t be a sexual being. self fulfilled. you are proving my point
[–]angrypuppy35 0 points1 point2 points 4 years ago (6 children) | Copy Link
Is your friend group really going to tell you whether your ugly or below average? Post your pic here and I’ll give you an honest rating.
[–]Refroedgerator 2 points3 points4 points 4 years ago (0 children) | Copy Link
See my reply above to eszibit. In terms of rating me, Ive actually done that via a few subreddits with the general consensus being my looks are not the problem, so you'll have to take my word for it in the context of this post.
[–]CashCarti2323 0 points1 point2 points 4 years ago (4 children) | Copy Link
Can you give me an honest rating please?
[–]angrypuppy35 0 points1 point2 points 4 years ago (1 child) | Copy Link
Sure
[–]grindforthegold 0 points1 point2 points 4 years ago (6 children) | Copy Link
Look man the only way you’ll know if you’re good looking is how women react to you. If they’re giddy and super nice and like giving you signs then you’re good looking. If they’re not they’re either taken or you’re not good looking. You’ll know objectively by how strangers (women) treat you
[–]Refroedgerator 0 points1 point2 points 4 years ago (5 children) | Copy Link
Sure, and Ive alluded to that in my post. Again, Im not trying to debate whether Im good looking or not. Rather, WHY when I get those signs do they do a 180 when I ask them out?
[–]grindforthegold -1 points0 points1 point 4 years ago (4 children) | Copy Link
did you kiss them and escalate before asking them out? you should first hold their hand then kiss them then either try to close or at that point ask them out, you shouldn’t be planetonic with a girl at the moment of asking them out
I think your assuming this is in a bar or something. No these are girls I know in a professional setting I see regularly, hence the term "acquaintances". Maybe this is my mistake haha
[–]grindforthegold 0 points1 point2 points 4 years ago (2 children) | Copy Link
so by asking out you mean asking out on a date?
Yes
[–]grindforthegold 0 points1 point2 points 4 years ago (0 children) | Copy Link
ok bro the only advice i can give you is, either flirt more with them or build more rappor before asking them out, or build up your social media etc, OR you can just try to take them on an insta date, without actually asking them on a date. hey wanna keep me company and grab a coffee i’m waiting for my cousin (lie) then you build rappor, flirt (an sample is just non verbal like mirroring movements or smiling a lot at each other or a verbal example can be like why are you looking at me like that i know i’m cute etc - assuming attraction between you two) then from there you can walk around with them let the back of your hands graze and try to hold her hand. if you’re nervous you can say something like “here let’s be friends” and hold her hand (saying one thing but doing another) if she said something be like oh whoops i didn’t even notice or something funny stupid like that
if she’s holding your hand you can probably kiss her at some point and if not you can just at that point ask her to hang out on a date cuz no girl is gonna let you hold their hand unless they’re into you.
Of course you could just indirectly cold approach a random girl and do the same and not be taking any heat or risk for hitting on a girl from work or your social circle but that’s a risk that’s up to you to take
this can build a lot of rapport comfort and romantic tension that can lead the question of a date to be much more fluid that random
[–]Hunterhunt14 0 points1 point2 points 4 years ago (1 child) | Copy Link
My guy most women aren’t gonna tell you how you really look, 7/10 is the number most people will default to because it’s above average while attempting to remain humble about looks. In short they probably lied to you about how you look. Now that aside dating is literally about how you can make the woman feel in that moment. Women aren’t logical creatures they run their logic through their emotions therefore their emotions are their reality. That’s why they say if you can make a girl laugh you can get her, it’s all about controlling her emotions and strategically making her feel certain emotions at certain times. Sounds horrible when put like that but that’s really how it is
[–]Refroedgerator 0 points1 point2 points 4 years ago* (0 children) | Copy Link
On the looks thing, I know which is why, again, I didnt ask directly, I did it through other people who didnt know me and in an environment theyd be more honest. And these are girls who didnt extend the same courtesy to other guys they rated. Additionally, for what its worth, guys tend tkorate me the same or only slightly lower, like 6 minimum, but most agreeing on 7. In terms of looks Im absolutely certain this is not a problem.
And as for the interactions, yeah that seems to be the consensus around here.
[–]NatashOverWorld 0 points1 point2 points 4 years ago (0 children) | Copy Link
If the women in your life can't figure it out, start observing your guy friends in action. A lot of behaviour is via observation and modelling.
[–]Relevant-Spinach294 0 points1 point2 points 4 years ago (0 children) | Copy Link
I usually go for the ol’ toe tickler!
They can never resist it, and now I have so many girlfriends 👯♀️
[–]THAT_LMAO_GUY 0 points1 point2 points 4 years ago (0 children) | Copy Link
You are good enough but not seen as sexual. You need to do more eye contact, teasing, flirting
You need a bigger funnel bro. Everyone gets rejected
[–]JLifts780 0 points1 point2 points 4 years ago (0 children) | Copy Link
Are you making them laugh and creating sexual tension?
You probs the decent guy, but not the hot guy that they wanna fk right away.
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