How to get a girl out of my league?

heretolearnsth · 2022-04-15T12:09:02+00:00

Start off by not thinking there's a girl who is out of your league

saulisdating · 2022-04-15T15:29:14+00:00

Dude it’s all about how you make women feel when they’re around you.

Forget about leagues, money, status and treat her like an awesome buddy of yours and shoot the shit with her and make her laugh and enjoy your company, sprinkled with a bit of sexual tension.

If you charm her with your personality, she’ll forget about all that other crap.

Also, do not show ANY insecurity about all that other stuff around her or that will turn her off you instantly.

Good luck!

MK2718 · 2022-04-15T12:16:35+00:00

How to Attract Someone out of my League?

It essentially boils down to not deciding for others that you are not good enough. Don’t disqualify yourself prior to even trying. Communicating doubt and worry in relation to thinking that another person is out of your league often creates a self fulfilling prophecy.

KaleidoscopeOk488 · 2022-04-15T11:45:21+00:00

Just go try and just be yourself if it works it works and if not at least you tried and if she’s worried about money then don’t worry about her 🤷🏽‍♀️

nelsne · 2022-04-15T13:57:08+00:00

You'd be blown away how many smoking hot women don't get approached. Many men are like yourself and assume, "She's hot and I'm sure she's taken. This is a waste of time. I could never get a girl like that" However many of these women never get approached for this reason. Flirt with her, you might just get a surprise

GalaxyBrainU · 2022-04-15T14:59:11+00:00

First, focus on believing that you are good enough for any person you set your eyes on. Second, Treat her like a regular person, not like some unattainable goddess who you should thank for gracing her with your presence. If she's as attractive and high status as you say, she probably has enough dudes fawning over her. If you don't put her on a pedestal, aka do things like playful roasting, joking around, and most important don't overcompliment or try to impress her with yourself, you'll stand out. Still treat her with respect though. Don't be an asshole. Also, YouTube "frame control".

yoitsappy · 2022-04-15T17:08:59+00:00

Get into her league

rivetcitymayor · 2022-04-15T17:13:03+00:00

I’m going to go against the grain here and say that leagues definitely exist and as man making more money, status, more confident, lifestyle etc all move you up leagues

Canadian-Seductioner · 2022-04-15T13:09:32+00:00

How do average guys get girls out of their league?

By being above average

How important is the networth of a girl's parents in a relationship?

Inconsequential

What practical steps can I take to win this girl?

Start by thinking of yourself as better than average. Have something to offer her. If you are literally no different from the next guy over, there is no reason she will have to be interested in you.

EARLY20RAG3R · 2022-04-15T14:56:44+00:00

Step 1- No ones out of your league Step 2 - Approach

That sums it up

Muramasaika · 2022-04-15T12:48:34+00:00

Work on ypurself until you start seeing that you're out of her league

CompetitionFair7686 · 2022-04-15T11:59:29+00:00

1 - Stop objectifying women, all this talk about “getting the girl”, like she is some prize to be won. How about you focus on connecting with the girl in an emotional and sexual level, rather than thinking she is an object that you have to win? In other words, how about you start treating women like they are human beings.

2 - Leagues only matter if you choose to take leagues seriously, plenty of guys don’t choose to take it seriously and can get laid with girls hotter than them because they are just fun and confident people to talk with.

3 - Stop putting her in a pedestal and giving her titles such is “my crush”… Not only is it too childish and immature to use the word “crush” to refer to a someone you are attracted to, but you also put her in a category where you are outcome dependant and afraid of losing.

You only put pressure on yourself to earn her approval, and this approval-seeking behaviour only makes you act in unattractive ways which make it impossible for you to connect with her, and get your feelings of attraction reciprocated.

4 - The net worth of a girl’s parents is irrelevant, if she reject you is because she feels nothing for you because you are boring and awkward, not because of her net-worth.

5 - Practical steps to connect with a girl and make her feel something include, teasing, roasting, bantering, joking, flirting, touching, qualifying, escalating… All of which are explained in the Wiki of this subreddit menu.

atomant88 · 2022-04-15T12:25:01+00:00

no one is out of your league if your game is strong. but the rules of game dont change based on who youre trying to pickup. just give her your best shot, same as any other girl

BackFlashy2939 · 2022-04-15T13:15:01+00:00

Don't think of her as out of your league, they're ppl just like you

Watahandrew1 · 2022-04-15T14:17:18+00:00

I'll tell you a secret. It's quite simple. Get on her league.

Bodacious_Dad_Bod · 2022-04-15T15:23:16+00:00

You start first by stop saying the girl is out of your league. Then she becomes in your league.

coldbrew18 · 2022-04-15T17:42:16+00:00

Show an interest in her and her passions. Don’t worry about her money or her parents money.

Chances are good that there are a lot of guys who fail to approach her because they don’t think they’re good enough for her. Show some ambition and she’ll respect you.

Let’s say you get together and you find that she wants to go out to a nice dinner all the time, or she suggests a trip to Cabo or something. Just say “babe, I can’t afford that”. If she helps or changes her plans, she’s worth staying with. If she gets upset, she’s probably not the one for you.

VDKay · 2022-04-15T17:44:25+00:00

Almost every sentence of this post is wrong

mjornir · 2022-04-15T17:45:36+00:00

Fuck your mutual friend’s opinion lol, they’re a hater. shoot your damn shot

lanraebloom · 2022-04-15T17:47:44+00:00

Get out of the mindset of "out of my league". Easier said than done though, i have that same problem with female athletes.

HoosierProud · 2022-04-15T17:50:46+00:00

No girl is out of your league brother. You’re a high value individual who has something unique and great to offer any women. Don’t forget this and don’t undersell yourself.

ResponsibilityKey427 · 2022-04-15T16:59:03+00:00

A lot of unrealistic advice here, there are definitely leagues in the dating world.

One guy has more success than another for a reason.

If you ain’t in her league then you gotta level up

Top-Conversation678 · 2022-04-15T12:17:34+00:00

First of all, if you are not used to hitting on women dont expect to get this girl especially if shes attractive and likely gets hit on by men on the regular, that being said- 1/whya re you calling yourself average or "out of her league" bro give yourself some credit just because a woman looks really good and has money doesnt automatically make her higher value than you i cringed a bit there 2/doesnt matter one bit. 3/ask her out. yes yes no no, many more fish in the sea

maxpossimpible · 2022-04-15T16:35:52+00:00

You can't as you already have the mindset that she is "out of your league". Work for 2 years on that.

EthicalSeduction · 2022-04-15T13:00:06+00:00

The Answer: Figure out what experiences you can give or share with her, that she cares about and really desires. This is worth gold in value!

So personally I volunteer in the kink/BDSM community which is all about safety, trust, connection, and shared experiences. So when I meet someone and we want to possibly play together, we start looking for shared interests that we can explore sexually. But so often the thing we settle on will be something new that both of us really craves to explore with each other. Now this may be my kink/BDSM-example but you can apply the idea to any other part of flirting as well, including how you first express your interest to her and what you all choose to do.

My suggestion in this case is to speak more with the mutual friend first. As you two talk, look for mutual interests, hopes, dreams, etc that your crush may be into. Basically do some research to try and get to know her better.

Some ideas for creating shared experience are:

Movies, theater, escape room
Sporting events, hiking
Go to your local rock climbing gym and try that for the first time. It's okay to suck at it but it's fun and shared and different.
Do you both have dogs? Take them somewhere.
I'm in the IRL kink scene and so we have new couples come out together all the time, and that's a really big new shared, bonding experience.
Talking! Are you able to be interesting enough to talk with that (1) you are safe and fun and (2) super interesting? If so, then that is it's own experience.

Dreams and Desires: Going deeper, see what you can learn either from your mutual friend or your crush about things she really wants in life.

Does she value travel and exploring?
Why is she not dating someone now? Is this actually a hard thing for her? Why is that? (Make it safe for her to be open and honest with you. Earn her trust.)
How "dangerous" is she in bed and should you be scared? :) Does she have any desires to try certain things? (Be willing to share your interests too, as this is a two way conversation and vulnerability matters.)

Basically through talking with both people, do an honest search to figure out cool things you all could do together.

An Additional Thought: When you approach your crush, I suggest being open (if and when it comes up) that you se first caught your eye and that you then talked with your mutual friend because you wanted to know more about her (she will appreciate that you are willing to go for things you want, have time and energy to invest, and that you are attracted to her). In fact you could even add (if it comes up) that your friend said "she is out of your league" (which will be flattering to her) and therefore you really wanted to try and make a good impression. Yes she may be rich or whatever, but you are fun, caring, and can help her experience something she wants.

Creating and sharing experiences is super connecting. It transcends social status and money.

Live-Ad-6309 · 2022-04-15T14:28:59+00:00

There is no such thing as "out of my league" and as long as you think that way, you won't get with them.

You can't attract someone you don't view as your equal or lesser. The second you pedistalize a woman, you lose your chance. So first off. Remind yourself, it's just a girl. There are 100 000 000 more just like her and more still who are even better. She is not special. She's just attractive.

Once you've done that, you then proceed to flirt with her, human to human. If she's the kind of girl willing to date down on the socio-economic ladder, then that's all it should take. Though I might note, most women don't enter relationships with men who make less than them. At most they'll hook up. But there are exceptions naturally.

tahapiie · 2022-04-15T16:44:56+00:00

That's the neat part, you don't

masmiester · 2022-04-15T13:35:50+00:00

The fact this is being asked means you have already lost.

You need to get good with all / any girls and get experience - then you can improve your league level.

urbeatagain · 2022-04-15T16:25:43+00:00

Tell her you don’t deserve her then she’ll think you’ll worship her forever.

epimpstyle · 2022-04-15T15:32:17+00:00

Do not be fooled by marketing. I can assure you that a girl will choose the best options among her friends to be her bf. If by chance she meets someone who is better than the boys from her circle, maybe that guy will be her bf. Just place side by side a picture of an average-looking guy with a picture of a top model (you will understand what I'm talking about). The image sells dude, she will not destroy her status being with the wrong guy.
You know the answer to this question because every parent wants a wealthy guy for their daughter.
There is nothing special to do, does not exist a magic recipe, just act normal :-)

bigbodi45 · 2022-04-15T13:17:13+00:00

start with understaning no women is out of your leauge. she gotta prove herself to you.

mmmfritz · 2022-04-15T14:33:04+00:00

Why would you want to go out with a girl like this? She didn’t make any money her parents did. Unfortunately there is still a class system in the western world, but hierarchies vary greatly between each other. Hopefully if someone is successful in one domain, they can see the value in another. Or you can just suckle at the teat of capitalism for your whole life and end up dying a resentful and boring prune.

Gigachad4Head · 2022-04-15T14:52:49+00:00

You simply cant, the reason i can tell is that you are out here thinking about leagues based on arbitrary perception of value. Once you she is just a human too instead of a transcendent godlike beeing, you will be able to talk to her as a normal person. Also work on yourself in the meanwhile.

kyle_fall · 2022-04-15T18:41:47+00:00

I'm gonna go against the grain and give you two types of advice:

1) Figure out what you specifically like about this girl so you have a way to find many other women like her so you develop an abundance mentality. IMO you're always starting at a loss if you think this woman is the only one for you and if you fuck it up you've lost something tremendous.

2) Figure out what she's about, what she likes and what her lifestyle is. Is she a posh rich girl that dates business owners and likes to go on a monthly trip? If that doesn't fit your lifestyle it'll be hard to get along with her.

Is she more of a rebel that doesn't really care for materialistic things and has a history of dating bartenders that take her to rock concerts and allow her to live a fun life away from her parent's restrictive authority?

IMO understand a girl's lifestyle and how it compares to yours is the best way to access compatibility(if you would even enjoy having her in your life and vice versa.) and find the ways you would even be able to charm her.

I'd say that the concept of leagues DOES ACTUALLY EXIST but in practice, it has to do more with lifestyle expectations than anything else.

If your lifestyle is smoking weed and watching anime then basically every girl that doesn't live like that is out of your league. If your lifestyle is taking care of yourself and going on fun adventures all the time then basically every girl that would enjoy that is in your league.

wam231 · 2022-04-15T19:54:52+00:00

When I was growing up, I knew this guy who dated a beautiful #10. Him plain, sloppy looking, poor immigrant family. Her rich upper class,, proper, money.huge mansion. None of his friends could believe it, they ended up getting marry. The thing is he had a good rap, was free, easy going, and confident. Their is no one out of your league. Believe she all ready likes you, and talk to her not thinking about the out come. If it doesn't happen you can still walk away with confidence. The girl who told you she out of your league, just maybe she likes you and wants you. Ask she if she'll be your wing girl, on a night out. No is a good indicator she's probably into you.

Title	How to get a girl out of my league?
Author	black-panther444
Upvotes	74
Comments	52
Date	April 15, 2022 11:37 AM UTC (4 years ago)
Subreddit	Posted in /r/seduction
Original Link	https://old.reddit.com/r/seduction/comments/u4636e/how_to_get_a_girl_out_of_my_league/
Archive Link	https://theredarchive.com/r/seduction/how-to-get-a-girl-out-of-my-league.1262025 https://theredarchive.com/post/1262025

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