[deleted by user]

Casanova-Quinn · 2021-11-12T23:27:48+00:00

This is the classic "no sex" test. It can happen for a few reasons:

The girl doesn't want to seem or feel like a slut.
She's testing your character. Cool guys don't act thirsty or complain.
She's testing her safety. If she can't trust you, she can't fuck you.

Edit: Also, I'd bet she jumped on you after your last line because that was the final confirmation that you weren't going to make another move. She had to make it happen.

erickacrites · 2021-11-12T21:19:37+00:00

You took on the social risk of letting her know she is wanted and you are very attracted to her and made moves. Then you reassured her that she doesn’t have to do anything she doesn’t want to do. Both of those actions created an explicitly transparent environment that let her relax and feel comfortable. From a woman’s perspective : of course this worked ? Seems obvious to me why it went so smoothly.

palatine09 · 2021-11-13T00:31:57+00:00

‘I don’t usually do this….’

mmmkaaaayyy · 2021-11-12T21:00:08+00:00

bro...... whenever a girl tells you that you are not f***** it's code for we are f******

don't even ask me why. but it is.

Labranth · 2021-11-12T21:16:15+00:00

[permanently deleted]

patriot777cw · 2021-11-12T22:04:29+00:00

basically yes lol you said you didnt want her in her mind and she wants what she cant have lol games

5_7pickup · 2021-11-12T19:19:46+00:00

This is called disqualification. Very classic move in pickup.

You can further disqualified by saying “yeah thats fine, Im saving myself for marriage anyways” when she tells you we aint fucking. Or say “yeah im not ready to lose my virginity yet”

redrussians · 2021-11-12T20:15:21+00:00

I think it's a form of disqualification. But I guess just like all game techniques, they only work if the girl is into you (which she obviously was since you've be sexting and stuff)

I think where PUA goes wrong is they think they can do these things (pushpull, neg, disqualify etc) to actually make a girl attracted lol. LIke imagine going up too a really hot 19 year old in a bar and you're not good looking and a bit fat and old and you neg her about her nails and disqualify and be like 'Sorry, you're too young for me' etc and thinking it's gonna magically make her chase you lol. When in fact she just looks at you like a homeless man and slowly moves away haha

moderndayfez · 2021-11-13T02:48:00+00:00

She wasn't telling you, she was telling herself

Skull_Kid1992 · 2021-11-12T22:14:57+00:00

Theres a few reasons why women do this. The main one being that it gives her all the power when it comes to sex. If she says "were not fucking" shes putting herself in a position of power. so, when you play it cool and end up having sex, she feels its because she was the one that allowed it to happen as she is the one who was essentially in charge of whether or not sex happens when she exclaimed "were not having sex". why do they do this? probably because society makes them feel like sluts if they were to just fuck

YetzirahToAhssiah · 2021-11-12T23:38:18+00:00

But you had to be relaxed and accept it for it to work

Yagametrics · 2021-11-13T05:12:17+00:00

I've been in a similar situation and didn't have sex. Lol.

Edit: and she slept over.

imbobo13 · 2021-11-12T22:40:12+00:00

Hahahah the same thing happened to me with my best friend xD

recyclablebanthas · 2021-11-13T09:33:44+00:00

1

..... she was in a weird mood or something, and she was telling me straight-up "We are not fucking".

Really common situation. Sometimes girls will do this when they aren't quite ready to have sex. Sometimes they just need time to get used to the idea and need to know a guy won't flip out at an inconvenience.

2

I was like "Okay cool" and just left her alone, took it easy, smoked a joint....

I told her that "Good thing you didn't fuck me tonight because I'm pretty high and tired". Not sure what happened but as soon as I said that she suddenly became very animalistic and started a crazy fucking session. Pretty crazy.

And this is pretty common as well.

A lot of guys flip out or lose their cool when a girl is actually calling for a pause and they think it's a rejection.

You played it the best way possible.

One-Hedgehog4722 · 2021-11-13T02:36:01+00:00

I had a similar situation, made multiple attempts n got rejected so I stopped trying, moments later were banging. I think part of it is that you’ve gained their trust by not pushing anything on them, showed that your chill, now they feel safe and probably more attracted.

1990MeWuzBorn · 2021-11-12T22:10:19+00:00

No girl is going to allow herself to be alone with you in a place where sex could occur if she didn’t want to get fucked by you to begin with.

jamesatom25 · 2021-11-13T02:22:17+00:00

This isn't new, this is called a shit test, a concept discovered by the most ancient PUAs

PsychologicalTune439 · 2021-11-13T14:47:42+00:00

I’m guilty of doing this but I’ll explain.

My fiancé wants sex 24/7 and for some reason that I can’t quite explain is the more he tries, the less I am in the mood. But when we aren’t suppose to have sex - whether people are around or when he isn’t trying so hard- that’s when I can’t help myself.

kryzsbeats · 2021-11-13T15:30:13+00:00

To OP saying he’ll use the same “technique” next scenario lol. You can’t just assume the next chick will be that way.

The next chick may suck you right at the door.

Moments of seduction are a case by case person to person basis lol you can use the same strategy it’s not likely it’ll work if the girl doesn’t give you the same resistance strategy tho.

The “we’re not fucking” is classic shit test. You passed. The next girl might use “I’m not a hoe” then what will you do? She might say “I’m not easy” Then you’ll have to have a conversation of reassurance to her (if you want to have sex that night) so it was good that you acted & were indifferent to the idea of sex.

That’s the realization you should take from this situation. Women know we wanna fuck and when we act like it’s not a big deal if we fuck or not they open themselves up to more possibilities. Simple.

faithinstrangers92 · 2021-11-13T05:33:38+00:00

What is phone sex?
I'd tell her to take a hike tbh, too old for childish shit tests and mind games, even if I sacrifice sex

Bkb1997 · 2021-11-12T19:03:19+00:00

Interesting

venus_fly_boy · 2021-11-13T12:02:02+00:00

Half of you sound like rapist apologists or whiney incels. No means no, always. However, of course that no can change to a yes at any given moment. And of course women need to feel safe before putting themselves in the vulnerable position of being naked w you. If we don’t feel safe, we’ll be tense and on edge during the sexual encounter because we’re not sure whether you will respect our “no”, “that hurts” or “I don’t like that”, should we say it. I don’t know OP or his date but it sounds like she wasn’t sure about having sex with OP because she wasn’t sure whether or not he was a douchebag. OP didn’t pressure her into having sex against her will and assured her that it would be okay if they didn’t have sex at all, ergo OP is hopefully ~not a douchebag~. That’s kinda it, guys. Women are attracted to non-rapists, people who are kind, people who listen, people who don’t talk “game”, “moves” and “strategy” with fellow 13 year olds on the internet. Women are not a monolith, on the most part they’ve all had vastly different experiences. If you want to “get into someone’s pants”, stop viewing people as walking vulvas and start viewing them as human beings lmao. It’s really not difficult. I’ve slept fully clothed in many beds with guys who just didn’t make me feel comfortable enough to have sex with them, I’ve also left early, stopped guys in the middle of sex etc. Honestly, the bare minimum for a sexual experience is knowing that the person you’re fucking treats you with genuine respect, who isn’t just pretending to enjoy your company so he can stick his little dick in the nearest orifice. We see you, dudes.

mwelothebest · 2021-11-13T13:54:45+00:00

You don’t understand how hyped you got me.

Szactrl17 · 2021-11-13T17:28:55+00:00

What you just discovered more likely is just an indecisive woman. Good luck.

HorusCok · 2021-11-15T02:16:42+00:00

When women understand you're not going to chase, beg or coerce, it puts them into unfamiliar territory.

rashnull · 2021-11-13T02:02:58+00:00

No means…it could happen

2021-11-13T02:52:07+00:00

You didn't discover anything.

FeelingRisk89 · 2021-11-13T09:42:31+00:00

No you didn't. She wanted sex and you weren't very willing to lead her to get it on.

This "relationship" will be short-lived.

Aubrey2214 · 2021-11-14T00:39:01+00:00

[email protected] message me on Google chat

2021-11-14T03:05:46+00:00

I just sternly say “Alright, well..you need to get the fuck out.” While pointing to the door. This is after they start to play games about not wanting to. Their reaction through body language then reads, “OH NO WHAT HAVE I DONE!” Then they flip and get SUPER into it. I don’t know man sometimes women get turned on by the weirdest shit.

Ultimately that’s a bandaid solution. The real solution is good chemistry and making bold moves earlier on during the date.

InsideOpening · 2021-11-14T16:52:34+00:00

this took me three rejections and a rape allegation to learn. very powerful. I pulled off the same thing by saying just seeing her tits is worth it we don't even need to have sex.

Equivalent_Ad7389 · 2021-11-20T22:39:06+00:00

A girls number 1 priority is safety. She knows you want sex and intimacy, if she feels you ain't lying about it and just being genuine she will respect that but she will test you about it for sure. Never hide your intentions. You don't want to be friends, make that clear but not in a weird way. Make moves cuz they aint gonna do it until they fully trust you.

Be blunt and a little bit of a dick, push pull but don't over do it or be mean. Speak your mind don't worry about what she thinks, she will sense you trying to be too nice, women are instinctively good at it.

Women use sex to keep their man around. If you confidently approached and been flirting she prob likes you and she knows she's gonna have to give it up at some point or else you'll walk away. And that will drive her insane.

Title	[deleted by user]
Author	[deleted]
Upvotes	703
Comments	102
Date	November 12, 2021 7:01 PM UTC (4 years ago)
Subreddit	Posted in /r/seduction
Original Link	https://old.reddit.com/r/seduction/comments/qsi8in/deleted_by_user/
Archive Link	https://theredarchive.com/r/seduction/deleted-by-user.1272430 https://theredarchive.com/post/1272430

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