Something to remember: It may seem obvious, but when it comes to girls, nobody is ever “too busy.” You’re either a priority, or you’re not. It’s that simple.

joenke36 · 2018-11-20T23:52:02+00:00

It's really not that black and white. Sometimes people are busy. Life is unpredictable. If someone cancels a date or is too busy for one at the time, give them a chance to reschedule/suggest another time. They might have a good reason that has nothing to do with you. If they don't make the effort to, it's probably best to move along.

pogoman · 2018-11-21T00:30:57+00:00

You've met her once and got her number and you're not quite a priority. You haven't earned it. Doesn't mean she wouldn't like you under the right circumstances.

darkknightxda · 2018-11-21T00:06:03+00:00

It ain't black and white. Theres this thing called nuance that you're probably missing.

Muhammad-The-Goat · 2018-11-20T23:59:43+00:00

This is bad advice. There are plenty of reasons why a girl might be too busy, and even though it would be nice if they told you exactly why, sometimes it’s not necessarily appropriate. If a girl says she’s busy, just play it cool and tell her to let you know when she’s available. If she actually is trying to curve you, she won’t make a new time. If she’s genuinely busy, she’ll get back to you and try to reschedule.

BlurryEcho · 2018-11-20T23:55:07+00:00

Coming from a guy who’s handle is puzzydestroyer13, I’m going to have to pass on this incel-esque advice. Thanks.

OtherOtie · 2018-11-21T00:15:59+00:00

I kind of agree with this when it comes to texting. I don't understand how someone can be too busy to send a message.

scone70 · 2018-11-21T08:26:15+00:00

Lawyer here. Unexpectedly busy all the fucking time. Not really a matter of priorities but of keeping my job. People can have reasons.

K3wp · 2018-11-21T00:00:52+00:00

This is why abundance is critical.

DragonHeartString · 2018-11-21T15:31:44+00:00

Sometimes "I'm busy" really means "I'm not into you," but a lot of the times it means, "this is 2018, I'm balancing family gatherings, friend functions, a yoga class I teach on the side, and that multi-million dollar project at work and I rarely have time for sleep." Either way the ball is in her court. Just leave it be.

nobody2000 · 2018-11-21T00:35:16+00:00

What? No. I mean "I'm too busy" is a vague response dedicated to distancing yourself from someone, but this talking about absolutes...come on.

I mean, would you apply that to yourself? 90% of the advice in this subreddit has ALWAYS been something to the tune of "don't be a doormat" or avoiding any validation-seeking behavior.

So would you drop what you're doing for a girl you're gaming?

Why would you expect the same the other way around?

Grifos · 2018-11-21T01:07:22+00:00

Wrong.

QNoble · 2018-11-21T00:16:43+00:00

Nah, people get really busy sometimes, dude

legend_kda · 2018-11-21T00:39:02+00:00

That's not true, sometimes people are busy. For example I'm going on a date on Sunday, but I have job training today and tomorrow, and I'm probably working on Thursday. I am a seasonal hire, and I'll be working weekends only. If they schedule me to work on Sunday I'll have to cancel my date, although I really don't want to.

Xagyg_yrag · 2018-11-22T03:36:35+00:00

This is terrible advice. People can be busy.

eitherrideordie · 2018-11-21T11:57:29+00:00

Haha I think people's taking OPs advice a bit too literal? (Though to be fair it is written that way). I think what's he's trying to get more at is if someone likes you then you're important to them too, they are more willing to hang out, or they'll reschedule to when they can, or they may even take time away from other things to make time for you.

If you find someone isn't doing that to you, especially if you've known them for a while, then you're probably not as important or close as you may want to be or think. That's not a bad thing, it happens, life happens, it just means it might be time to move on.

MrSaiyan_333_ · 2018-11-21T00:41:01+00:00

OP is (mostly) right: don't forget that she would have time for Brad Pitt even if she's "too busy" at the moment.

gaylord300 · 2018-11-21T01:02:18+00:00

He's saying it in absolutes because it's true Obviously there can be times when the girl just really couldn't come out. if she really wanted too , she would reschedule. Don't take what he said as a fact. It's more of a guideline.

ModernWolfStrategies · 2018-11-21T05:57:48+00:00

I think it’s really hard to play catch-up in building value when you had maybe a weak first meeting and are only communicating through text.

Circumstances also change for women more often then men usually. Sometimes you’ll have a really strong interaction and get a number, but then little do you know but an ex boyfriend creeps back into the picture. Timing can be everything and you don’t always have control over that.

noprideinsomniac95 · 2018-11-21T13:19:46+00:00

A lot of people in this thread are saying sometimes they are too busy to meet someone new. Well honestly it doesn't matter. Either they are really too busy to meet with you, or they're using it as an excuse, either way, you aren't meeting them. So take it at face value and move on.

Yrielll24 · 2018-11-21T15:27:48+00:00

I've dated a girl , it was nice , we've enjoyed being together during one week but since we knew i had to move back to my hometown things got pretty weird (i might have scared her a bit) and now she's telling me she's to busy (19yo). Shit i have to find someone else. Why did she never told me she don't want to start a relationship with me then ? this is really painfull to not have any clue on wether she wan't to see me another time or no.

sadomasochrist · 2018-11-21T00:05:40+00:00

"Fuck yes or fuck no." -Mark Manson

Chichachachi · 2018-11-21T00:06:38+00:00

It's also that you don't have enough value. If you were a person giving her the winnings to the powerball, she'd definitely meet you. But that being said, I don't think it's ever healthy to blame the woman for not being a priority. Move on and keep increasing your own value and fun.

Ervin_A · 2018-11-21T05:06:02+00:00

You’re getting shit on a little in the comments cause this is high-level advice. I agree with your post 100%. And I also agree with what people are arguing against you.

Such paradoxes like this are abundant.

DankensteinPHD · 2018-11-21T02:52:53+00:00

Thats not true. I have plenty of close friends who I don't have as much time to hang with as I'd like - same logic applies here.

kathrynannemarie · 2018-11-21T02:55:04+00:00

But like, this goes both ways? And lives are hard to maneuver. People have interests and hobbies outside of just dating. It’s not my priority, but I could get to know someone and have a paradigm shift

RevealingInsight · 2018-11-21T15:40:33+00:00

Priority resembles how much a person values something. If a person values you over other things, they will find the time to spend with you. He/she could be busy at the moment, however, they will find and set aside time.

VioletOleander731 · 2018-11-21T15:45:11+00:00

Can confirm, if it happens consistently shes probably not interested give her like 3 - 4 chances. If shes really that busy shes not going to have time for a relationship anyways (Spread the times out too though) Try one on the weekend and one during the week, one at night and one in the morning etc. etc. If shes busy for each of them...she's not that interested

theforgetfulbuddha · 2018-11-21T01:10:36+00:00

100%

Spacemage · 2018-11-21T04:58:54+00:00

This is true. Being on the other side of this, I had a relationship with a girl for a short while. We are both in school, and I also work full time. She eventually got mad that I wasn't spending enough time with her, even though she knew I was extremely busy.

I did try to make time to see her on break at class, but in reality it was just too much work. My priority was absolutely school (got an A in my two summer classes which had been the hardest to date at that time.)

I very well could have prioritized her more, and honestly had she not given me shit for being busy I would have. The truth is, I wasn't too busy, it just wasn't worth my time.

Pinklightningzzz · 2018-11-21T04:21:34+00:00

Amen to that. Totally agree

bottledchap · 2018-11-21T08:09:17+00:00

deleted ^{^{^What}} ^{^{^is}} ^{^{^this?}}

IAMTHESmoothOperator · 2018-11-21T08:11:16+00:00

I agree 100%. A girl can make time quite easily. If she's super busy realistically she can always find a way to reschedule. People don't want to live in reality.

Title	Something to remember: It may seem obvious, but when it comes to girls, nobody is ever “too busy.” You’re either a priority, or you’re not. It’s that simple.
Author	puzzydestroyer13
Upvotes	473
Comments	102
Date	November 20, 2018 11:27 PM UTC (7 years ago)
Subreddit	Posted in /r/seduction
Original Link	https://old.reddit.com/r/seduction/comments/9yxm7q/something_to_remember_it_may_seem_obvious_but/
Archive Link	https://theredarchive.com/r/seduction/something-to-remember-it-may-seem-obvious-but-when.1457124 https://theredarchive.com/post/1457124

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