Have you experienced mental illness in your dating life?

wtknight · 2024-07-10T22:34:40+00:00

OP, please make a small edit to your post in order to bring up the AutoModerator.

LevelCaterpillar1830 · 2024-07-10T21:27:49+00:00

You sound just as mentally ill as the people you're describing. Maybe the relationships you get into are assortative.

Anyway, have you experienced mental illness in your dating life? Have any interesting stories?

No cases of documented mental illness, or people with formal diagnoses given to them, but I believe so. Anxiety, BPD, OCD and the like seem to be fairly common these days. People are probably more mentally ill than ever, at least where I live.

It sucks that they're also good at concealing it, so the first few days/weeks end up pretty tame, but they quickly spiral into their actual personality and the demons start to come out, since most can't keep the masks up for too long.

I also behave in a way which makes people feel comfortable around me, so I draw out these sides of them much faster (which is efficient; less of a waste of my time, if I find them unbearable).

mlo9109 · 2024-07-10T22:18:31+00:00

My own, because this shit is depressing and destroys your self esteem.

EulenWatcher · 2024-07-10T21:54:14+00:00

Sounds like you need some mental health help yourself. You went through a shitty situation and it doesn't seem you've processed it.

I got an online stalker when I was a teenager. It isn't exactly dating-related, as he is my distant relative. He got in touch with me randomly through social medias and we chatted for a bit. I didn't feel anything off at first - he's a relative; although, we'd never met, but we had people we both knew. He knew my grandma. But then it turned into "you're very mature for your age" and escalated to "I wish I could kidnap you, so no one else could touch or smell you". He found all my online pages, found my online diary, downloaded my photos etc. I told my older cousin and have never heard from the guy again.

It scared me off social medias and posting any pictures for years to come. I'm still uncomfortable with posting any photos.

Throwaway47294746047 · 2024-07-10T21:43:59+00:00

How are you able to so confidently estimate his iq? Saying he was at a below average but fairly normal level to now being borderline disabled.

HomeworkFew2187 · 2024-07-10T21:26:32+00:00

unfortunately in dating mental illnesses have become common. particularly in men.

No-Rough-7390 · 2024-07-10T21:28:53+00:00

A woman I dated a little bit after getting on apps turned out to have clinical depression and a family history of mental illness (didn’t find this out for a couple of months). She was about 6 months out of an LTR where I could kind of surmise that she just got bored, but I was dating non exclusively at the time so I didn’t think it was a big deal. We had a ton of fun in all regards, got along really well, and she worked around my schedule pretty perfectly. She then started to demand most of my time and she took meds around me. Now, I can be a dick and it’s because I have my shit together and worked really hard to do so, so I asked what was up. She told me it was an SSRI and while I’m not a fan, it had no bearing on me or our dating so I didn’t say anything. Well she was also a nurse in school for an RN, and one night she drunkenly confessed to actually taking meds from the hospital that she wasn’t supposed to (I’ve dated nurses before and was kind of skeptical because I know how crazy those are regulated). But my move was going to be to pull away. Well she must have realized she fucked up by telling me and proceeded to kind of do a love bomb event followed by a straight up “I’m not ready for this” ghosting.

Younger me would’ve been fucked up by it, but at that point I realized we had our fun and fortunately I didn’t have to deal with any negative side effects of her behaviors. No idea what happened to her, but I hope she is well.

sprckets21 · 2024-07-10T22:23:39+00:00

Is mental illness and depression just the norm now? My last 2 ltr ended in a hellfire of total insanity that gave me ptsd. My current gf is diagnosed bipolar.

Relationships get so insane. I talked to this one guy and he said all my relationships end great, I’m still friends with my exes. I replied wtf, are you serious, how?

GoldSailfin · 2024-07-10T22:29:54+00:00

Hell yes I have. I had to get a restraining order against him.

jay10033 · 2024-07-10T23:10:25+00:00

How exactly is this an example of mental illness in your dating life? Did you date the friend who tried to fuck you?

PossibleVariety7927 · 2024-07-11T00:10:44+00:00

Why the fuck are you still dealing with the guy? You’re also crazy.

ej_theraider · 2024-07-10T21:52:31+00:00

🤷🏽‍♂️

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NewPomegranate2898 · 2024-07-10T23:54:01+00:00

[permanently deleted]

Incarnate24 · 2024-07-11T01:40:45+00:00

Yeah I was gonna be FWB with this girl but then found out she had a lot on trauma (SH scars everywhere) and was blowing up my phone about how depressed she was so I ended up just making it a ONS which she was very upset about & accused me of that being my intention all along

Fresh_Truth_8569 · 2024-07-11T02:49:45+00:00

I guess when you are living in the mental institution it’s pretty hard to date. It’s like every guy you meet is crazy or something. My suggestion would be to take your meds and lie down.

-Kalos · 2024-07-11T03:54:37+00:00

I was in a relationship with a woman who had ADHD like me, we just brought out the worst in each other but we're better off friends. And another girl who had debilitating depression which made me pretty depressed myself

MiddleZealousideal89 · 2024-07-11T04:33:23+00:00

Other than my own depression and anxiety, I dated a dude who was bipolar. I dated another dude who I'm pretty sure was bipolar but he didn't want to get checked out to confirm. The first dude was way worse, mostly because he was an asshole on top of being bipolar, the second guy was a great person but I couldn't be with someone who had a problem and refused to address it.

Hoopy223 · 2024-07-11T05:13:42+00:00

I had a friend who went schizophrenic/psychotic and it was nothing like that. He was normal during school but around his teen/adult years he got weirder and more irrational. Lots of drugs and abusive home life didn’t help either. In between bouts of violent craziness and hallucinations he managed to knock up a girl who ran like hell from him after about a year. Now he lives in a group home type of place.

CraftyCooler · 2024-07-11T06:23:20+00:00

Yeah - one girl was probably deep on autism spectrum, she was very good looking, but she was also a hermit barely speaking with anyone, her behaviors were strange like she was buying things for people to like her, she was considering sex like having a coffee, she didn't understood any kind of metaphor or jokes and she was obsessed with football(the right one, not this US rugby). Another girl was a rape victim, her father was an alcoholic and she was molested in childhood. She was extremely possesive - like she wanted me to move into her place after one month so she can have an eye on me all the time and be sure what i'm doing. Girl with extremely low self-esteem due to her looks. She was very tall, bit chubby and had some issue with her leg so she was walking with a slight limp. For me it was not a problem - tbh I was very impressed with her personality and how stylish and overall sophisticated she was, but her insecurities were crazy. She was considering herself total uggo. She wanted to make money to do plastic surgery - and she did, it's hard to recognize her.

RoninOnBananaLeaves · 2024-07-11T07:08:04+00:00

I have no dating life because of my mental illness😂 I have OCd and it was really severe a couple of years ago.

Never even tried, although eill try in the near future as I'm much better now, therapy and medications did work for me🙂

Dense-Tell-6147 · 2024-07-11T18:15:51+00:00

Yes.

I was abused as a child and a teenager, in my first relationships I happen to deal a lot with girls with anorexia, bulimia and personality disorders (mostly bipolar and avoidant). I won’t dive deep in what happened, nor blame anyone, neither I nor them were in our best capacity, I can certainly say it would have been better for both that such relationships didn’t happen in the first place. I then attempted suicide and spent a long time alone rebuilding myself.

I can’t stress that enough: mental issues are not for a partner to treat. If the other person has an illness and is not working or has no intention to work on it, run for your life

SupportRemarkable583 · 2024-07-10T21:43:14+00:00

What dating life?

Ayaka_Simp_ · 2024-07-11T03:13:51+00:00

This is just a rant about your shitty friend. However, yes, I've dated multiple mentally ill women, and the result is always the same: I end up wishing I never met them. My new rule is to instantly disqualify any woman with a history of mental illness. IMO, people with mental illness should not date. They tend to cause more harm than good and need to work on their own problems. Mental illness is one of — if not — the biggest red flags I've encountered in my dating history.

Title	Have you experienced mental illness in your dating life?
Author	asexualgolddigger
Upvotes	0
Comments	63
Date	July 10, 2024 8:35 PM UTC (2 years ago)
Subreddit	Posted in /r/PurplePillDebate
Original Link	https://old.reddit.com/r/PurplePillDebate/comments/1e067es/have_you_experienced_mental_illness_in_your/
Archive Link	https://theredarchive.com/r/PurplePillDebate/have-you-experienced-mental-illness-in-your-dating.1523881 https://theredarchive.com/post/1523881

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