My son turned 16 two weekends ago. I've been asking him for months if he was interested in getting a learners permit. His answer was always no.

My ex emailed me today at 4:30pm (custody exchange is at 5pm) and said that our son had asked her to take him to get his permit, that he had passed, that she had added him to my insurance and I would need to do the same.

I would never have agreed to him getting a permit without stipulations. The primary being that he would be required to work and pay for his insurance.

It should be noted that he doesn't need a license. We live in a major city. His mom and I both live on a lightrail line. There are plenty of places to work along the lightrail. His school is halfway between our places and within walking distance. He doesn't participate in any activities that require driving him to them.

I called my insurance provider and asked "when my son turns 16 and gets a permit, even if he only lives with me 50% of the time, and I do not allow him to drive, does he have to be on my policy?" They said yes.

So, he shows up at 5 and I tell him to call his mom and have to wait. He's not staying with me anymore. He's welcome to come back when he has a job. I told him that he decided to make adult decisions without my input, and those decisions have financial ramifications for me, so these are the consequences.

He called his mom and left.

I have warned him multiple times that if he plays me off his mom, that he will find himself in the same boat as his mom in my eyes.

Thoughts?