After a recent back and forth with /u/Perfect-Resist5478 in which her arguments were dismantled and completely demolished, I became curious. She was saying that women care more about lying than they care about male height (even though she admits that no woman would turn down a man who lied about being shorter than his actual height). But the more interesting part was when she implied that we have a moral (or ethical) obligation to reveal aspects about our lives in an OLD profile that other people may not like.

So, for example, a fat woman has a moral obligation to mention something about being fat on her profile in case any men out there don't like fat women; and she has an obligation to divulge her exact weight if asked. I totally disagree with this.

I think OLD is basically an amoral endeavor. Neither party owes the other party anything; and especially not information which could eliminate them from consideration. OLD is about tactics, and not morality. For instance, it would be bad tactics for a 5'6" guy to claim he is 6'5". But it might be a tactically smart move for a 5'6" guy to claim he is 5'8". But neither of these lies are immoral or unethical, imho. Not in the context of OLD. The name of the game is to market yourself in the best way possible. It's buyer beware.

And yes, maybe you will waste your time if you go on a date with someone who would have filtered you out automatically if she had known the truth. That again is a tactical decision. There is nothing unethical about wasting your own time if that's how you view it. And you certainly shouldn't be concerned with wasting a stranger's time, when you're both taking the risk to meet each other in person.

Nobody is owed anything in dating. So there are no obligations on either side except those things which protect the consent and autonomy of the other party. You're not obligated to help someone reject you.

Does anyone else think that OLD isn't about morality but more about tactics?