The female sexual strategy (hypergamy) cannot be understood without reference to the male sexual strategy (polygamy).

So many people in this subreddit have absolutely no understanding of hypergamy. Even guys who claim the be RP here seem to misunderstand it. I’ve seen dozens of instances of people saying “men are hypergamous too because they want to get they best partner they can”. Again, this is a total misunderstanding about what hypergamy means.

Hypergamy is the method of sexual selection in human females while Polygamy is the method of sexual selection in human males. Are there exceptions to this rule? Maybe, but they are few and far between (if they exist) and I’ve never met any. I’ve met more intersex people than I’ve met women who were not hypergamous.

Let’s start with the men to explain why men are NOT hypergamous. The sexual drive of men is ruled by polygamy. In other words, quantity over quality. Do men want a woman who is a “9” instead of a woman who is a “7”? No. In a perfect world where that man could have his deepest desires met, he would take the “9” and the “8” and the “7” and the “6”, all the way until about “4”. In a pinch, a man who is a “8” will take a female “2”. This is polygamy. Also look towards pornography. What images do men look at for sexual release? Is there any man on the planet who looks at only one girl every time he wants to release? No. He imagines a wide variety of women of differing heights, shapes, sizes, complexions, ethnicities, “looks”, etc. That’s how male sexuality works.

Contrast that with hypergamy. Women are NOT polygamous. They are not attracted to a wide variety of men. They are attracted to a very narrow type of man because their sexual drive is ruled by hypergamy. Quality over quantity. Women are only attracted to men whom they perceive as superior to them. Now, what counts as “superior” is a function of that individual woman but it’s heavily influenced by her society. For some woman it’s mostly status, for others it might be money, for others maybe ambition, and for others it could be height or physicality. But usually it’s a combination of all these things. But the point is that the woman must view the man as her superior for her to be sexually aroused. Additionally, woman try to secure the highest status man she can secure. MEN DO NOT DO THIS. Men are not hypergamous.

And finally, there is no value judgement here. There is no right or wrong to either of these evolutionary sexual strategies (even though polygamy has been demonized). This is just the way it works. Don’t kill the messenger.