Hi seddit, how did you find motivation to go talk to girls when its so much easier to stay in your comfort zone?

mossyben89 · 2017-04-18T18:21:34+00:00

The realization that there is a zero percent chance a girl will just walk up to you and fuck you. But the chance goes up from zero to... something greater than zero if you at least talk to her. It's that simple. If you ever want to have sex, you have to talk to a girl.

failatsomething · 2017-04-18T20:59:28+00:00

You take a look at yourself in the mirror on a Friday night, sitting at home, drunk, taking a break from playing a video game, alone, depressed, and say "enough". You make a conscious effort to change and you shrug off rejection. Tell yourself to man up and stop taking things so hard. Go out and embarrass yourself. Do it over and over and over and over and over until it doesn't mean a thing. In between those rejections you'll kiss girls, fuck them, love them, hate them, forget about them, and go through cycles. It's a new kind of fun.

2017-04-18T21:31:39+00:00

You're on the last day of collage, the girl you wanted to ask out has already left for home, you will never see her again, you will never know if you ever had the chance to be with her, that regret will live with you for the next few years.

Or, you could ask her out and never live with the feeling of "what if?". It's much better to save the anxiety and thoughts asap than to let it eat you up for the next few years trying to justify not talking to her.

AssJustice · 2017-04-18T21:24:50+00:00

Your time is limited man. Wether you decide to make a move or not, the clock is still ticking. Do you want to spend the rest of your life trying to find some motivation, or are you gonna spend the time fucking bitches and living life?

Best advice I can offer is get out of your own head and live life my dude.

joombla00 · 2017-04-18T21:39:51+00:00

Play a little game with yourself. Everyday just talk to 1 girl. Doesn't have to be a pretty girl, doesn't even have to be a girl you want to sleep with. Then keep upping your goals every week.

There's no secret. The more you do it the easier it gets. The first step is always the hardest.

LearnEndlessly · 2017-04-18T19:57:01+00:00

If you never ask the answer is always "NO"

Umbrifer · 2017-04-18T20:12:26+00:00

Because unless you're a rich celebrity, if you want sex you either have to talk to woman sexually or visit prostitutes.

Radicalmattitude1 · 2017-04-19T01:46:29+00:00

When my buddies girlfriend came up to me at the bar one time and said " dude you fucking suck at hitting on girls. Seriously, you need some fucking lessons or something. Get your dick out of your hand and go talk to girls you fucking pussy!"

I got annoyed at her comment and walked up to the nearest group of girls to prove that I actually had game. The girls brutally ignored me and every other girl I opened that night thereafter ignored me/ rejected me.

At the end of the night my buddies gf gave me the biggest "I told you so" look ever.

I vowed from that point forward to forget everything I knew about seduction, become a student of the game and practice until I got good.

Calidore_X · 2017-04-18T21:55:41+00:00

Try r/nofap. It's often very cult like with its talk of super powers. But I have found it to really help with the confidence.

BobSaiyaman · 2017-04-18T18:52:26+00:00

Dude. If you know a girl is into you, then just go up to her and say whatever comes to your mind. She'll probably dig it yo.

Awston · 2017-04-18T23:11:30+00:00

Stop jerking off. You'll get so crazy horny you'll be dying to talk to women just for the chance of release.

I only masturbate about once a week. It keeps me highly motivated to keep talking to women.

purplepilled2 · 2017-04-18T21:38:41+00:00

Gotta rewire your brain to seek out painful moments controllably. Adversity breeds self satiafaction. Forget your comfort zone as something positive, view it as something to be challenged every day. Reinterpert nervousness and excitement

_Jake_The_Snake_ · 2017-04-19T01:57:41+00:00

One day you're going to die.

Xanarxses · 2017-04-18T22:16:40+00:00

As of yet I have not.

There are no miracles that can break it for me.

There's no epiphany or realization that will make me go "whoa that's so true man." leave the house and then approach like a maniac.

Circumstance certainly doesn't help either. Night shift sucks dick. And it means I essentially am free at the time few others are.

Not much to approach during these hours.

The1InCharge · 2017-04-18T22:31:46+00:00

For me, it was knowing that I'll never meet anyone otherwise. I wish it was more sophisticated than that, but there it is, in a sentence...

Poklady · 2017-04-19T03:20:18+00:00

Thank you all for the great responses. This has helped a lot

2017-04-18T21:34:42+00:00

There is another way: mind your business do a great job at being a human being be social have hobbies (not videogames or snorting crack)

Then wait... they will not approach like we do, they will make it easier for you to approach.

'Don't try to catch a butterfly - invest into your garden and there will be plenty.' Or something like that... by some smart guy

aznology · 2017-04-18T23:32:02+00:00

If girls aren't in your comfort zone get out of your comfort zone

santereality · 2017-04-19T00:54:13+00:00

I like girls. I feel motivated to engage them on a regular basis because I'm swimming in testosterone. I don't talk to them when I'm walking around campus though, that's weird. I talk to them at parties, at work, on the phone, at bars, and so on.

ImJustSo · 2017-04-19T01:29:21+00:00

Personally, I chose to make being out of my comfort zone the thing that is my comfort zone. I like new experiences and life happens once. If I'm doing something new, even if it's a good experience it's not as comfortable as other good things I'm used to doing. So I make it a point to just try things to find out if they're good or not. So, that new experience is the good thing, whether it turns out good or not.

thesilvermoose · 2017-04-19T02:01:20+00:00

There is so much value in these comments OP - you better start taking some action.

If you don't change, then NOTHING will change!

vikromantik3593 · 2017-04-19T04:27:03+00:00

I realise I have to change to have a more fulfilling life that I've always wanted

Elite-hacks · 2017-04-19T04:45:08+00:00

You gotta realize you got two balls and a dick. What the fuck bro? That means you are a man, don't let you, or anyone else tell you otherwise.

Dweebl · 2017-04-19T04:53:53+00:00

Because just because something's hard doesn't mean you don't do it.

Most of the time that's the thing that's going to give you the best results. The best part of learning to approach is you get comfortable outside your comfort zone.

Delirium4 · 2017-04-19T05:09:18+00:00

You will never score if you don't take a shot

saffer001 · 2017-04-19T17:13:40+00:00

I didn't.

2017-04-19T22:36:24+00:00

Motivation of getting what I want, pushing my limits.

BrettEllisDotNet · 2017-04-19T04:16:30+00:00

You "find" the motivation when the pain of being a lonley, scared, unconfident "man" becomes greater than the perceived "pain" of a few rejections.

dealwithitxo · 2017-04-19T06:38:45+00:00

Girl here: honestly who gives a shit, I've been hit on by randoms countless times and unless they're making me uncomfortable I don't think much of it. I always reject them but that's just me, still props to them having the balls, and even if u get rejected who cares chances are you'll never see them again...

And personally I'd rather have tried than die not knowing!

DaygameCoach · 2017-04-19T01:23:19+00:00

Read all the sidebar help including the part on approach anxiety. Also, "How do I approach?" is a topic for the beginner's board, /r/askseddit.

Hi seddit, how did you find motivation to go talk to girls when its so much easier to stay in your comfort zone?

Comments

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Title	Hi seddit, how did you find motivation to go talk to girls when its so much easier to stay in your comfort zone?
Author	Poklady
Upvotes	105
Comments	107
Date	April 18, 2017 6:06 PM UTC (9 years ago)
Subreddit	Posted in /r/seduction
Original Link	https://old.reddit.com/r/seduction/comments/664jv1/hi_seddit_how_did_you_find_motivation_to_go_talk/
Archive Link	https://theredarchive.com/r/seduction/hi-seddit-how-did-you-find-motivation-to-go-talk.1423522 https://theredarchive.com/post/1423522