How much have your romantic/physical relationship experiences contributed to your overall happiness?

Joelypoely88 · 2025-11-01T23:42:57+00:00

Probably about 70%. Having a relationship was life-changing, and my depression disappeared.

Patrickstarho · 2025-11-02T01:17:19+00:00

No amount of self love could ever measure up to being intimate with someone else.

reddit_is_geh · 2025-11-02T07:07:37+00:00

I'll admit, when I'm in a relationship, I'm much more driven. Being single you're kind of just wandering and fending for yourself. But when you have someone in your life, you're more motivated to achieve and be productive because it's more than just you who you're fighting for.

It's something I think only men will understand.

attendquoi · 2025-11-01T23:10:52+00:00

Maybe 15%. I generally consider my happiness to be my own responsibility.

Neglius · 2025-11-01T23:27:37+00:00

I’ll answer the third tier since that applies to me. Closest I can say is I have never felt more alive and purposefully driven than when I delusionally thought I had a real chance with my oneitis. That includes typical milestones such as chasing and finishing out my degree as well as my time in service. Everything else since has just been getting by because it’s what’s expected.

MyLastBestChance · 2025-11-01T23:08:29+00:00

In the aggregate, romantic relationships with men have been a net negative. Certainly there were amazing times and good times and I’m absolutely not saying that men are all bad, or that everything that wasn’t good was their fault. It definitely takes two either way.

I am saying that I’ve been far happier and my life has been far better overall without one than with any of them.

Jetpine9 · 2025-11-02T01:20:57+00:00

Now they are just memories (mostly treasured), fading into the background, but they were very important at the time. They are still important in some kind of life satisfaction thing, in as much as past experiences can influence the present (I'm not sure how much that is % wise, but I think it's not insignificant).

sammyb1122 · 2025-11-02T01:25:33+00:00

Big picture - my LTR has contributed hugely to my happiness, but only because it has been mostly stable and happy. It has NOT been easy to build and maintain this though. Sometimes it requires compromising my short term happiness for the long term benefits.

For those of you just looking to lose their v card, or hookups, the actual lived experience of that contributes little or negatively to happiness. It can artificially prop up your self esteem if you're lacking it, but it does not provide happiness at all. But I know most people want to learn this lesson for themselves.

P1anth0 · 2025-11-02T03:31:52+00:00

My husband currently is about 90% of the reason I’m happy because we are about to have our first child. Before that he was like 75% of the reason I was happy. Still quite a bit, because it’s like living with your best friend. However the financial stability has also brought me a lot of happiness. I was working dangerous jobs I no longer have too work at all. We were able to buy a house together which has helped keep our costs of living low enough to have excess.

Obvious_Smoke3633 · 2025-11-02T04:23:39+00:00

All of my romantic relationships have more memorable negatives than positives. I had some fun times for sure. But overall, men would try to financially, physically, and sexually abuse me. Not to mention the negging, lying, cheating, and gaslighting. If my current relationship ends similarly I'm not dating again for a very long time. I've lost my sanity, self esteem, tens of thousands of dollars, had a miscarriage, a few std scares. Not to mention how much time and emotional energy Ive poured into relationships, not worth 2 or 3 years of dick and giggles just for them to blow everything up.

ImNobody265 · 2025-11-02T04:39:22+00:00

Honestly having no experience with date or sex has been a net negative on my general happiness. I feel low all the time and I only felt better when I thought I had a chance with an old friend of mine a couple of years ago. At this point seeing romantic/physical relationships in media or irl just make me feel terrible

Barely-moral · 2025-11-01T23:08:30+00:00

Being in a long term relationship is 100% the cause of me finding meaning in life and no longer wanting to turn off the console and let the game be over.

That being said, my relationship with miss moral contributes only 20% to my overall happiness and that is because I allow it. It could be 0% and I would still be happy.

Yes, I could be happy and lacking in meaning. That would still leave me considering the rope.

mrfoozywooj · 2025-11-02T04:11:29+00:00

Hugely, from a social and household standpoint I have a much more "normal" life nowadays with social events and nice friends.

Its good to have someone whos family to confide in thatss not your parents also.

ResponsibilityAny217 · 2025-11-02T05:23:12+00:00

I like relationships I think they’re fun/inspiring but I do not find them fulfilling so to me they contribute 20% towards my happiness.

But I wouldn’t describe them like that I would describe them like a shot of happiness. Something that’s worth the value of $20-$50 depending on the relationship.

> What would say was the biggest shaping factor you’ve taken away from your relationships in regards to your personal happiness?

Relationship/love are truly inspiring. They make you think differently see things in a different way etc.

throwaway164_3 · 2025-11-01T23:53:47+00:00

A tremendous amount

Few greater pleasures in life than a hot woman moaning your name in ecstasy as you’re fucking her brains out

Also the sound of satisfaction she makes when you enter her. Watching her breasts swinging and hair spilling all over as you’re pounding into her …. Hearing her completely lose it and be very vocal… Good sex is awesome and life changing

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Reasonable_Mouse789 · 2025-11-02T02:43:35+00:00

I could have everything and still feel empty inside, but fucking around gives some fun stories to tell

Junior_Ad_3086 · 2025-11-02T05:51:18+00:00

maybe 20%? it's hard to quantify honestly but i've never been unhappy because i was single and there was a time in my life where i avoided dating entirely to focus on other things without it really affecting my well-being. relationships require effort and compromise after all.

the biggest factor for me is good, regular sex tbh. if that was taken off the table hypothetically, i'd prefer being single. of course there are other benefits to relationships but i also love the freedom of being able to do whatever i want when i want, not having any extra responsibilities etc.

Objective_Ad_6265 · 2025-11-02T08:41:16+00:00

Past experience doesn't matter, it's removed and healed, it were just mistakes. Current state like 90%. Romantic love is my meaning of life.

MoonriseOverEarth · 2025-11-02T18:23:27+00:00

My first marriage brought me nothing but misery. My second has improved my life by quite a bit.

Artistic_Speech_1965 · 2025-11-03T11:01:50+00:00

Tbh, now I trully understand my relationship is a multiplier. If I am not happy before engaging, it won't make me happier but worse. I need to be happy and good with myself

y2kjanelle · 2025-11-04T00:45:31+00:00

Maybe 30% ish.

BougieHeaux · 2025-11-01T23:40:49+00:00

..quite a bit.

85%

I wholly attribute where I am in life to the relationships I have.

I have a proven support system that will fly across multiple nations if they have to in order to ensure my livelihood, safety, happiness, anything.

My romantic relationships are similar.

65%, perhaps.

Without my romantic partners I likely wouldve been some sort of tragic life story.

...especially in my younger years.

HugeInvestigator6131 · 2025-11-02T06:35:09+00:00

relationships gave me my highest highs and lowest lows, but looking back, the biggest swings came from chasing people who didn’t actually want me

for me, happiness shot up the moment i stopped making romance my scoreboard
it’s wild how much calmer life gets when you see dating as dessert, not the main course

the sharpest lesson i pulled from NoMixedSignals: if your whole mood depends on someone else texting back, you’re not dating, you’re gambling

stack your own life first, then add people who make it better
never the other way around

Rasputin_the_Saint · 2025-11-07T03:40:07+00:00

Being that I'm married, it's pretty good.

Being that I'm married, it kinda sucks I don't get to apply years of social development, wealth and networking to the dating arena.

Title	How much have your romantic/physical relationship experiences contributed to your overall happiness?
Author	Top_Pomelo_7775
Upvotes	16
Comments	88
Date	November 1, 2025 6:44 PM UTC (9 months ago)
Subreddit	Posted in /r/PurplePillDebate
Original Link	https://old.reddit.com/r/PurplePillDebate/comments/1olvkub/how_much_have_your_romanticphysical_relationship/
Archive Link	https://theredarchive.com/r/PurplePillDebate/how-much-have-your-romanticphysical-relationship.1565797 https://theredarchive.com/post/1565797

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